To Shell with Gunshots
by Natalie Ryan
Summary: My first fic about a cartoon. The guys are going through some rough time. Warning (some scenes or events could be just too strong for younger age). Time-2006 shortly after they were forced to find another lair, and Leo is again the target of the new villains, but with occasional glimpse to the present 2015. Place-NYC. TMNT currently belongs to Nickelodeon, I do not own it.
1. Trouble

Chapter 1-Trouble

* * *

 _ **So, here is my new fic and it's about a cartoon, the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles, the 2003 version. I haven't seen the previous version from the '90s nor the new TV show from 2012. As you can tell from the story I am a big fan of Leonardo, he is my favorite turtle and I enjoy writing about him and the others as well.**_

 _ **I was addicted to it years ago and now I am again as I rewatch the old episodes. I hope you'll like the story. I'm new in the world of cartoon fics, and I'm still adapting.**_

* * *

 _ **Enjoy.**_

He was dreaming of his previous fights. He was dreaming of the first time they beat the Shredder. The feeling of comfort, no more fear for his brothers or his-their home. The way Master Splinter made the Shredder cut the wooden posts on the barrel full of water and sink to his own end was impressive. He couldn't tell the grudge Splinter had for his Master's death. He never seemed to give away any signs that he actually looked for revenge. But, that was Splinter. You could expect anything from him.

Then, he remembered the day his morning run - a part of his training, was interrupted by the Foot Clan. They chased him all over New York and cornered him, enabling their Master, the Master of destruction to appear after all the damage has been done. Like a real coward, the Shredder always came after the fight was nearly over to give the final blow and put someone away forever.

That day Leonardo felt helpless, and he still felt the rage that invaded his mind and body that day. He was able to fight the Foot ninjas, but when the Elite team of Ninjas came along on the ride was when he felt his life slipping away. When they took his swords and sent him flying through the air he was certain he won't make it. Yet, he made it and he scared all of them. The leader was hurt, they all have been hurt with him. Even Raph, the hothead of the group felt his insides turn out when he saw the shape Leo was in. No matter how hard he tried to hide his feelings that day he truly showed Leonardo how much he loved him.

Of course that wasn't the only time Leo's life was in danger.

He was dreaming of the poisoning while he was in the middle of a fight with Usagi.

He dreamed of the day they finally put a stop to the Shredder. The day all of them were scarred. He remembered the Shredder pushing him hard and Karai's sword stabbing him. That day he lost part of his shell on the upper left side. Whenever he actually remembered about that day he felt that he lost something more than just part of his shell. He lost a part of himself that he wasn't able to get back again.

Well, he managed to come to the level he was before that episode in his life after the time spent with the Ancient One.

…

That's when Leonardo screamed and woke the shell out of his brothers. Raphael was the fastest to come to his room and he tried to wake him up. Soon Donnie and Mikey came by his side to help him get to Leo.

"Leo, wake up bro! You are having a nightmare. It's not real bro, just wake the shell up!" Raphael screamed now.

Leonardo found it tough to open his eyes. His eyelids were heavy on him and he fought the pain behind them. When he finally opened them he couldn't look at anything, it was too bright with the lights on. His head hurt like shell and his whole body hurt too. He felt worse than when fighting the dark forces of their enemies. He could hear Raphael yelling at him, but it was like coming from afar. He closed his eyes.

It was Donnie that checked him on the forehead and jumped when he felt the heat.

"Raph, he is burning up with fever."

"No kidding. Leo don't go all fever on me, not now."

"Come on Leo." Mikey whinnied.

"Donnie you are the one that plays the doctor all the time. What's going on with Leo?"

"I guess it's a cold, I can't really tell Raph. I'll run some analysis in the lab to determine the exact cause. Meanwhile Mikey grab a towel and cold water. The cooler the better. Press the towel on his forehead as many times as needed." Donnie looked at Leo as he walked in his lab and thought, _come on Leo, not you again_.

...

It was Raphael's idea of taking shifts watching over Leonardo. It was three hours since his scream woke them up and Michelangelo was halfway through dreamland when Raph came up with the plan. He sent Mikey to bed, Donnie still in his lab doing analysis, Master Splinter was in his room meditating and Raphael was the one that had the actual nerve to sit up with Leo watching over his oldest of brothers. The way he lay on the bed gave him a peace of some sort, but he knew that Leo wasn't feeling very peaceful right now. He was moaning every once in a while and he was constantly trying to rest his body in the right position.

It was Raphael that helped him with his position, taking Leo's head in his hands and unintentionally sitting on the bed, most of Leo's body covering his legs. Great, now he was the one that felt uncomfortable and it took him ages to adjust to the new position. He was careful not to make Leo more uncomfortable than he already was. With one arm he secured his hold on Leo, with the other pressing the cold towel on his forehead. Suddenly Leo grabbed his arm and no matter how hard Raphael tried to pull it out of his grasp he couldn't. Leo stopped thrashing and moaning after that and Raph let it stay that way.

It felt good to watch out for Leo for a moment instead of Leo watching for him and the others all the time. It was in that position that Donnie found them and smiled. Good old Raphie, mushy and softy. God, it felt good to see him like that, his constant anger completely out of him. Mikey bumped in Donnie's shell and his heart caught up in his throat at the sight.

Damn, Don and Mikey were caught off guard with the sudden change in Raphael. Not that they were surprised. They still remembered the day the Foot almost killed Leo and they were forced to leave New York. In Casey's Grandmother's house while they were looking out for Leo, it was then when Raph showed for the first and last time his true feelings for Leo, he even shed tears.

"Wait till I get the camera and snap a picture of this. Then I'll hang it over the TV set. It's gonna be hi-la-ri-ous!"

"Mikey..." Raphael growled and Michelangelo suddenly felt his older brother slap him on the back of his head.

"How'd you...? You were just there on the bed...?"

"I'm a ninja, remember Bozo?"

"Okay Raph, no need to be that angry with me. Geez, I can't even joke with you anymore."

"Leo's in grave danger and all you can think of is joking with me Mikey?"

Don stepped between the two brothers. "Raph come with me. Mikey stay with Leo. Oh-oh!"

"What now Genius Boy?" Asked Raphael irritated.

"That wound on Leo's left upper arm, where did he get it?"

"Dunno. He was here the whole day yesterday. Oh wait, he did get out."

"It's red and infected. Probably that's the cause for the high temperature. Okay. Mikey you stay with Leo. I'll speed up the analysis. Raph come with me we have to talk. We need to figure out where did he get that wound."

…

Raphael grunted and followed Donatello in his lab. "What's the idea Donnie?"

"First of all you were yelling and that won't make Leo feel any better. Second, you were yelling at Mikey for trying to make a joke on you. You know Mikey, the goofy brother we have that always lightens up the mood? Well it is about time to know that his defense mechanism is smiles and jokes whether you like it or not. He is worried about Leo as much as we are. It's just his ways of showing off his worries about Leo. He talks too much I know, but cut him some slack this time. After Leo gets well you can fight whenever and for whatever reason you like. Now, we have to help Leo." Donnie yelled the last sentence and Raphael backed up a little.

Angry Donatello was never a good sign. His vent rarely went off, but when it did, you didn't want to be the turtle that gets in his way.

"Donnie, let me get this straight, you said talk right? Well, you are talking most of the time, that makes it monologue not a talk."

"Very funny Raph."

Donnie's face was unreadable mask and Raphael could see the effort hidden behind it.

"I get your point Donnie. I know why Mikey does what he does whenever he does it, but all this Leo getting sick all of a sudden and all, makes me feel uneasy. I'm on edge."

"Just try not to kick Mikey's shell for nothing will ya?"

"Okay Genius Boy. By the way, your monitors beeped couple of seconds ago, you should check it out."

"I will. We good?"

"Yeah Donnie, we are all good."

…

Raphael got out of Donnie's lab and went to see Leo. Seeing Mikey holding the cold towel over Leo's head made him feel uneasiness in the pit of his stomach. He regretted treating Mikey like good for nothing just 10 minutes ago, but he was a tough guy and Raphael was the one that will never admit his true feelings to no one except to himself.

"Do you think he'll be better Raph?"

Raphael turned slightly to see worried Michelangelo looking at his direction.

"I don't know Mikey, but he better not bail on us now when we need him the most. Maybe I'm the toughest in strength of all four, but he is the toughest in mind and focusing on the task in hand. He better not..." Raphael was about to say 'not be dead' when he heard Splinter behind him

"Don't Raphael. He is still alive. His spirit is still with us. Leonardo is a fighter. He won't give up on his life and his family, not yet."

"Master Splinter, but how?"

"He needs a real doctor this time." Donnie spoke in low voice behind them "My analysis shows traces of gun powder. From a real gun. Nothing like Triceraton or Federation weaponry. This kind of weapon is a .38 revolver. And I guess Leo was shot by accident while on the topside. The question is how and who shot him?"

"No accidents with us bro." said Michelangelo

"Michelangelo is right. We need to investigate this." Said Splinter

"The better question is" Raphael chimed "where the shell we'll find a doctor for Leo? We're not exactly on the list of wanted patients."

"I'll call April. Maybe she knows someone that will keep its mouth shut." Said Donatello

"They better be or I'll kick Leo's shell for the trouble he is getting us into." Raphael snorted

"Oh boy, Leo you better wake up soon." Said Michelangelo sighing "Or Raphie is going to kick your shell. You know him when he gets all angry on you."

…


	2. The Doctor

Chapter 2-The doctor

He felt fire, it was damn hot in the room where he was. He felt a deep pain in his left arm, he couldn't move. He felt like someone tried to pull his body apart and was about to succeed. Then he heard voices. Familiar voices. They were arguing. They sounded the same as his bros, Raph and Mikey. Then he heard Donnie. He tried to speak, but his throat was dry. He trashed and tried to free himself from the hold someone had on him. He had to escape. He was the one that always had escape route on his mind. He needed to get away from the person that was hurting him. Who was holding him?

Oh, shell.

The fact was, he wasn't held down. It was his body that made the illusion of captivity. The pain was unbearable. He couldn't move. And then no more fire, no more hot room. Darkness. He was swimming in darkness.

...

"Donnie what's wrong?" April said as she poured herself a cup of coffee

"It's Leo. He..." Donatello told April all about Leo's current state and that they needed a doctor.

"Actually there was this girl, a good friend of mine. I think she went to Med school. Let me look for her number and I'll get back to you."

"Thanks April."

Raphael looked at Leo and then turned to the others. "Whoever did this I swear I will kick their shell for what they did to my brother."

"Wait a sec Raph. We don't know who or why. Maybe Leo wasn't the actual target." Donnie said

"If it wasn't meant for Leo then it was meant for somebody else. Somebody else innocent. Look Donnie, I know you and Leo always see the best in people, but let's face the facts will ya? First of all, when someone fires a gun it is for two causes. Either the police shoots some bad guy in an attempt to save someone's life or some bad guy uses it to shoot at another bad guy or innocent people, sometimes even bystanders." Said Raphael

"You are right Raph, but let's just see what Leo has to say after we are through with this."

...

It took Natalie awhile to answer her phone. It was almost 6 in the morning and she was supposed to sleep. It was her day off, and nothing would change that. When she looked at her phone, she saw the identification number. April O'Neill. Right, that girl in highschool, the girl with pink hair.

"Yes April."

"Sorry Natalie did I wake you up?"

"Well yeah, but I sense something's wrong by the tone of your voice so cut to the point quick."

"There's a friend of mine that needs help. He has fever and his brother says it may be a gunshot wound. He can't tell exactly when was he shot, but his state is getting worse by the minute. He always treats his brothers, but this time he doesn't know what to do."

"Can you specify why your friend hasn't checked in a hospital yet?"

"He is not human."

"He what?"

"He is not human. He is a mutant turtle. Actually there are four turtles, Leonardo, Donatello, Raphael and Michelangelo and their Master Splinter, a rat. He raised them and teached them martial arts. They speak, and they live in the sewers. Not exactly the kind of patient a doctor wants."

"Turtle or human, it's a life and it needs to be saved. Give me a number from one of them and explain to me where exactly is their home."

"It's called a lair."

"Okay, give a specifics about the lair and a number from one of them. Alert them that I will be arriving shortly at their lair."

April was surprised by Natalie and how she was able not to be scared from the fact that her future patient wasn't human. She seemed even happy to have to treat the turtle. Yet, April figured that Natalie hadn't heard all of what she said. She was so laid back. Well, she always was... And that's what helped her get through life.

...

A millennia later April called and told them she convinced the doctor to come by their lair. It was a she, and she was one of the most famous trauma surgeons in New York City. Dr. Natalie Akita.

"Akita. Wasn't that a dog race or something?"

"Yes, indeed Michelangelo." Master Splinter said

"She sounds Japanese." Said Raphael

"She is, according to April. She has Japanese ancestry. Her grandparents emigrated in the USA in the late 1960s with their two kids, son and daughter. The daughter of their daughter, Natalie was born in 1985." Said Donnie fascinated by her history

"We'll discuss history later Donnie. Now, the priority is Leo." Said Raphael

"Yeah I know Raph, you don't have to remind me about that every minute. I can see with my own eyes."

"My sons please, don't do this to each other. Don't fight. Your brother needs you and you won't do any good fighting and bickering about everything. What did Miss O'Neill said Donatello?"

"She said that Dr. Akita will call me when she is here. April gave her my number."

"Good."

Donatello kept the towel on Leo's forehead and tried to reduce the high fever. It seemed to go down to 40 degrees Celsius, but it was still high.

"How we didn't see the wound before?" said Donatello more to himself than to the others "We should've seen it before. There was no blood. I guess the bullet entered inside the flesh and stayed there. If Leo was bleeding he didn't tell us and he probably stopped it himself. Thought it wasn't a big deal. Or the bleeding stopped itself so Leo didn't actually knew he was shot. So much possibilities. I'll try and figure out something. You guys stay with Leo."

"We've got this Genius." Said Raphael as he took Donnie's place.

After Raphael yelled at Mikey half an hour ago, the youngest turtle was quiet and still. _It was so un-Michelangelo_ thought Raphael as he stared at Leo. He often called him fearless and bossy, but Leo wasn't that. All Leo was trying to do was look out for their shells. He was the leader, and it was his job to make sure his brothers were safe. That's why he felt so safe, 'cause he knew that his older brother was looking out for him and the others.

It was Leonardo that knew how to put Raphael in place when he was angry. Raphael was fighting Leonardo since they were little, but Leo never seemed to care that his brother questioned him whenever he felt like it. Instead Leo was always there to give him advice and be there for him for a talk, or even a fight if he needed that to keep him out of trouble. Leonardo took every word and every punch. All he did was to move on and never look back.

The fact was that Raphael did all of that as to distance himself. Bonding was never Raphael's field and he felt something heavy on his chest, like someone tried to rip his chest apart and take out his heart.

Maybe bonding wasn't his field, but right now Raphael was more than determined to work on his relationship with Leonardo. And with the others, too.

...

Dr. Natalie Akita was a tall, well built girl with dark black hair that went shoulder-length and dark brown eyes. You could see by the way she moved that she was full of confidence. Almost 90% of her wardrobe was in all shades of blue. It was her favorite color and at the same time it was the symbol of peace and serenity.

She was determined to help all kinds of living creatures continue their life if possible and if that meant a turtle suffering a gunshot wound, then so be it. April didn't tell her much. She just said gunshot, sewers, lair, rat, 4 turtles, mutants. Not much, but it was enough.

The fact was that Natalie always wanted to meet new people. But, not any people. Special people. She wanted to explore her surrounding. She hadn't had any real friends in her life. The one she had, were friends that just used her when they needed her. After that they could be gone for months without a phone call. Natalie's friends were the characters from the books she read, and the characters from the TV shows she watched.

Her Grandfather once told her, before he passed away that in her life, she had the ability to bring peace in people's lives and make them realize they are all good in nature, some more than others. It was in her destiny to help people, that's why she became a doctor.

Every life counts and every life matters was her motto.

He was a wise man, her Grandfather.

...

Natalie inhaled deeply and opened the nearest manhole she noticed. She quietly entered in the sewers and followed the path April told her about. She soon arrived at the former pump station - now lair. She took out the cell phone and called a certain turtle Donatello.

"Hello."

"Donatello?"

"Yes."

"Here Dr. Akita. I'm in front of the door of your lair. Let me in."

"Got it."

Donnie punched the alarm code, activated the safe system, the bypass system and unlocked the front door which took roughly 5 minutes. It was a pain in the shell to wait 5 minutes to get in and 5 minutes to get out, but after Karai found their old lair and destroyed it, Donatello couldn't risk any chances so he made it tough for them to get in and out.

If it was tough for them, then it would be tough for the bad guys just in case they decided to bother their peaceful life underground.

Dr. Akita certainly never saw anything like this before in her life.

"Cool. Man, whoever did this is a freaking genius." She said, amped as she took in her surroundings.

"Thanks." Said Donnie "And welcome to our home."

"Thank you. I suppose you are Donatello?"

"Yep. Nice to meet you."

"Same here. So you did all the wiring and security systems and all?"

"That would be me. The turtle that always likes to explore. And invent."

"He is the geek in the family. Always with a new project." Another green turtle joined them, followed by the third.

"I'm Raphael."

"And I'm Michelangelo."

"And I Miss Akita am Splinter." A large grey rat came to the door. Their Master as April called him. He bowed to her. She bowed back.

"Nice to meet you guys. I suppose that the turtle on the bed right over there is Leonardo right?"

"Yes. That's Leo."

Natalie immediately went to the bed and tended the lying turtle. He moaned and thrashed. She injected him with a tranquilizer and she patted him on the cheek. She was so gentle with him. She sensed four pairs of eyes watching her closely.

...

Natalie tended the wound on Leonardo's arm and while she did that she tried to engage a conversation.

"Whoever gave you the names is awesome. Those were definitely one of the greatest guys in the history of painting and sculpturing."

"That would be me, Miss Akita."

"Oh, please call me Nat or Natalie. Miss makes me feel old."

"Alright then what seems to be the problem Natalie?"

"The wound is infected, but I think we discovered it on time. I should be able to tell you more after I make some additional tests and operate him."

"Operate? What do you mean by that?" Asked Raphael

"I mean surgery Raphael. If you want your brother back of course." Natalie said with a calm voice.

"And how do you think you could manage to transport a mutated turtle in the morning rush hour to your hospital _Nat_?" Raphael snapped back

"It's easy. We put some clothes on him, then I'll drive him to the hospital, and you should let me work my magic." Said Natalie with a smile.

"She is nice." Donnie muttered while picking some clothes for Leo.

"I'll go with you." Raphael said, determined.

"It's dangerous for you outside right now. Imagine the chaos if someone sees a turtle that talks in the waiting room."

"I'm coming. That's it!"

"Raphael! Enough. You've heard her."

"But Sensei..."

"Sensei?"

"Yeah, he is our Sensei, our Master, our father. He taught us to the secrets of martial arts. He still does that."

"Oh, yeah April mentioned you were a Master to the turtles. Sensei." Natalie saluted Splinter and continued wrapping the wound on Leonardo's arm.

"I saw some Katana down there. Leonardo's huh?"

"How'd you...?"

"They suit Leonardo's spirit perfectly. He is a natural born leader, his body and mind are connected into one and his inner strength is what makes him the best at what he does. He is all about training, punctuality and he is tough when it comes to preparation about a battle. He always knows how to lift your spirits up when you are down, and these scars show that he was in great pains somewhere I'd say three or four years ago. He is kind and gentle turtle always helping others, always with advice prepared. He loves meditating, I guess, and he is in a constant battle to get his brothers on the right road."

"Astute observation Natalie." Splinter was stunned.

"I always find it fun when I read people Master."

"Yeah? Well tell me, how well can you read me Natalie?" Raph all but exploded.

"Raphael. Favors sai, a mighty weapon for a guy like you. You are always the guy that wants to throw the first punch, when is needed and when not. You are a hothead. You always react on impulse and think of the consequences later. You favor your left side and you are worried a great deal about your brothers, but you are hard when it comes to feelings. You are the toughest in strength from all four, while Leonardo is the toughest in mind. Your blood is always on a boiling degree. Always angry and filled with grudge. You want to kick something right now I can feel it. But, you better not. Or Donatello will be mad. He was the one that decorated this place and I don't think you want to step on his nerve right now. He is the hardest of all to get mad about something, but when he does get mad, then you better run and don't look back. You think of Leonardo as fearless and I think you are right to a certain point. Michelangelo irritates you with his goofiness, but you like that. You love them all Raphael."

"I... I don't know what to say." Raphael ran out of words.

"You don't have to say anything Raphael. I know you are too much a tough turtle to admit I was right."

She smiled at him. Before Raph had a chance to speak Natalie said that she was ready to go.

"After everything is over I'll call Donatello and we'll figure it out about you guys coming to the hospital. I promise to take good care of your brother. You guys maybe aren't human, but I really really like you. Care to tell me some story sometimes Sensei? Over dinner maybe?"

"Of course my daughter."

...

Raphael helped Natalie to export Leo from the lair to her car.

"Please take care of my brother."

"I'll protect him with my life."

"How come that you are not afraid from us Nat? You come to the home of 4 turtles and a rat, mutants, and you don't say a word? Most people would've freaked out by now, but not you. You are as calm as you were when you came here."

"I've seen far worse in life Raphael to be scared from you and your family. Plus you seem like a nice bunch of guys... turtles and a rat, and you care for each other. It's all that matters. You can't see that much in the people anymore nowadays."

"Right. And Natalie? Call me Raph."


	3. Safe

Chapter 3-Safe

It was the longest day in the turtles' life. They impatiently awaited the phone call from Dr. Akita. But, the phone was dead for two hours now.

Raphael was pacing up and down the lair.

Master Splinter was meditating with a thought that the meditation could actually help him to connect with Leonardo's spirit and tell him not to give up. _"It's not your time my son. It's not your time. Come back to us."_ He kept saying

Michelangelo was reading his comic books over and over again. He was flipping the pages and reread the words he knew by heart like the alphabet.

Donatello spent his time in the lab analyzing and trying to find the sense in the current situation. Why Leo? Why the oldest of them had to be on the other side of the stick always? Why?

...

Natalie brought Leonardo in the hospital. She took him gently in her arms, careful not to touch his wounded arm. She realized that he wasn't that heavy. She felt like she was holding a child. Like she was holding the child she once had and it was taken from her by force two years ago.

She ordered the interns not to be disturbed. She ordered a quick CAT scan and x-ray on Leonardo, a blood test and a preparation of an OR. She promised Raphael that she'll take care of his brother and she was doing that. She reserved a room under an alias, so he won't be disturbed. No one will never notice that a mutated turtle was a patient in their hospital. Well almost no one.

...

"It's almost 5 p.m. What the shell she is waiting for? She should've called by now." Raphael yelled and startled Michelangelo that was taking a nap, since he hadn't slept much the previous night.

"Patience Raphael. Patience, my son. Natalie said that she would call us as soon as she is finished. Look on the bright side my son."

Raphael retreated to his room, determined as soon as everybody was in their beds to go outside and find that hospital and see with his own eyes that Leo was alive and breathing.

It was like someone read his mind, 'cause at that moment Donnie's shell cell rang. He came quickly out of his lab, almost tripping over the table in an attempt to answer the call. "Yes?"

...

The CAT scan and x-ray on Leonardo showed no sign of bullet fragments, nor of damage of the internal organs. Natalie prepared the OR. She prepared Leonardo too. She took out the temporary bandage off of Leo's wound. The wound was swollen and red. She carefully cleaned the wound and closed it with 8 stitches.

The temperature was still high, but she believed that it will drop in the next couple of hours. She heavily sedated Leonardo, hoping that he will sleep through the night. He needed rest, but she was afraid that after he wakes up, Leonardo will have tough time to recover to his previous state. She didn't know how long he was shot before his brothers noticed, and there was certain amount of time between the discovery and her arrival to the lair. It was a miracle he was still alive.

Any human would've died from blood loss. But, Leonardo wasn't any human. He was a mutant. So far so good.

He would be exhausted, she thought as she took out her cell phone before returning it in her pocket. She decided to be sure about Leonardo before she gave false hope to the guys.

So, she stood by his bedside, taking his right hand in hers, recalling an event that happened not so long ago. The loss of her child. Her only child and her husband.

...

It was a warm day in June. Natalie just finished her shift in the afternoon. She was going home. She took the bus home and ran like crazy from the bus stop close to her home, when she realized that in 20 minutes her husband will leave for the airport. He had an important meeting in Los Angeles and he needed to go away for a week. She begged her supervisor to let her at least to say goodbye to him, but he was a stubborn man and she worked all morning.

When she came home, she found his suitcase by the stairs, but he wasn't home. She figured out that he was in the bathroom or with their daughter in her room. She checked out the whole house, but they weren't home. Her husband and her daughter weren't home. She panicked, kept calling her husband on his cell, but no one answered. Finally he came back together with their little girl.

"Where were you? I've been calling you like crazy."

"Well our little chipmunk wanted to have some ice cream with Daddy before Daddy went to LA, isn't that right Lea?"

"Yes, Daddy is telling the truth Mommy."

"I see what you did you two. An alliance against me. Let me see... Okay, I forgive you."

She smiled and hugged them. She was so afraid something happened to them that she actually believed they were taken or worse, that they were dead. Her fears came true not long after that.

They were by the door, Darren (her husband) put his suitcase in the trunk of the cab. Darren leaned on to kiss Lea goodbye. Then he kissed Natalie on the cheek. Right before he entered in the cab, a bunch of ninjas surrounded them. They wore a weird looking emblem on their clothes and they fought hard. Her husband (that also knew martial arts) fought them as fast as he could. Natalie tried to protect their daughter, but she was taken away from her hands. She fought the ninjas too, but one of the ninjas cut her with his sword. She fell on the ground and watched as her husband was beaten down by the ninjas. After they were all down (including her little daughter) the Shredder came to sight.

Apparently he was behind the attack on her family. He killed Darren and Lea in front of her eyes. She survived the lethal blow of the Shredder. Before that day Natalie never actually believed that the Shredder existed. She heard that he killed her Master, the one that lead her into the world of martial arts, but she never believed he was real. For Natalie the Shredder was like an urban legend. Yet, he felt so real, his laugh taunting her.

She never forgot his laugh, nor his voice that plagued her nightmares.

...

No matter how much she thought of that day and what happened, she always blamed herself for what happened to her family. If she was strong enough maybe she would've saved them.

After that day Natalie Akita found her consolation in training martial arts, learning the importance of connecting the mind with the body (that she knew, but forgot!) and she let herself be more prepared if someone tried to attack her. She couldn't let herself to be helpless if she found herself in life or death situation. The death of her husband and daughter teached her a lesson. Everything that's beautiful, lasts shortly.

After that day Natalie took nothing for granted. She lived the life to the fullest, and enjoyed everything that happened to her. Because today you are, tomorrow you are just history. If you travel out of space and come back the same day, you will see that you came back to another day, another year. It's because the time is different in different universes. In space may be only a day, but on Earth it could be years. The important thing was, no matter what happens to you, you have to rise and shine and show the world you are not defeated. Not by a million years.

Natalie never found out the reason behind the attack. She learned all she could about Oroku Saki (a.k.a. the Shredder) and the dark forces of the Foot Clan, the ninjas that attacked her family that day, the ones that wore that strange emblem on their clothes.

She prepared herself for what was yet to come. She thought that he would come back. Because if you read books then you'll see, the bad guy always comes back. Always.

Natalie was scared from herself now when she recalled those days after the loss of her family. She was ready to kill, what an irony, her profession was to save lives.

She was ready to kill, to kill the scum that killed her family, almost killed her.

But, she was happy that someone put a stop on Oroku Saki's rein. She witnessed what happened in his home almost a year ago, and she was sure that he was dead on his track, because he never came back. The hurt was finally over.

She couldn't have known that the very same turtles and their Master were the ones that suffered a great deal in his hands before they defeated the Shredder.

She couldn't have known the grudge Leonardo held in himself for what happened. That he felt like he let his brothers down when they needed him the most. That he felt like he was a failure, good for nothing, all training was gone when the Shredder pushed him and Karai stabbed him.

All that she knew so far was that for some reason the blue clad turtle that lay in the bed was shot and almost died, and it was her faith to save his life.

For the stories that were yet to come.

...

Natalie watched Leonardo sleeping, and by the solo act of holding his hand she felt immense comfort. She felt safe. After her husband died, the first person (absolutely not human!) she felt safe, was Leonardo. It was like he was the brother she never had and she wished for while she was a little kid.

She checked his vitals and temperature. It finally dropped to 37,5 degrees Celsius. Leonardo was out of the woods. She called Donatello.

"Yes?"

"Donatello it's me, Natalie. Leonardo is fine. I was able to patch the wound. His temperature dropped. If he continues this way, he could go home in couple of days."

"That's great Natalie. When can we see him?"

"Let me clear the path for you. I'll call you back."

...

"What did she say Braniac?" Raphael asked

"Leo is okay. We can go and see him, but first she needs to clear the path for us."

"That Natalie knows how to keep her promises." Said Raphael

"I told you she was nice."

"That girl has suffered the loss of a family, I can feel that my sons. That's why I'm sure she'll make everything in her power to save your brother. She wants this family back together."

"You always had a thing of knowing people's secrets before they even spoke Sensei."

"When you come to my age, you will know how to that too Raphael. Now, let's go and see Leonardo."

...

Natalie was engaged in a mission to make Leonardo's stay in the hospital invisible. She thoroughly planned her every moves, choosing the people she trusted the most to keep her secret. But someone once said "Three can keep a secret if two of them are dead."

In this case Natalie had to lean on her gut and trust the people she thought would never say a word to the outside world of their strange patient. Because they were screwed big time.

In this world where the people constantly searched in others what they couldn't find in themselves, and constantly kept an open tab on other people's lives, Natalie couldn't risk unknown people to know about Leonardo's existence.

"Listen Lucy, you are my personal assistant. I trust you with my life and with my secrets. There is an important patient in room 307. What I need you to do is keep away everyone out of his room. I assigned couple of nurses to help him and give him his medicine, but no other person except them, you and I will ever know that he is here. Also I want you to know that no matter what hour it is, his family is allowed to see him. For everything that's out of the ordinary you will call me, no one else. Are we clear?"

"Yes ma'am, Dr. Akita."

"Good." She took out her cell and called Donatello

"Guys, all clear."


	4. Talk

Chapter 4-Talk

Donatello put the Battle shell in gear and drove fast through the busy streets of New York City. Splinter was holding his seat like it was lifeline and it took all of his will and courage not to throw up inside the vehicle.

"Hey Donnie why don't you slow down a little. Master Splinter is feeling sick from your driving!" Raphael yelled when he saw what was happening "Besides your driving like you are on Formula 1 Championship won't get us faster at the hospital. Leo won't go anywhere."

"Yeah Donnie. It could get us 6 feet deep if you understand what I mean. If we talk about fast driving, Raph is the one that always gets off on speed, but even he has a point now." Michelangelo said.

"Donatello, my son listen to your brothers." Said Splinter through clenched teeth

"Sorry Sensei. It's just..."

"No worries Donatello. I understand that you are worried for your brother. But I'll feel better if you take away your leg from the gas pedal for a moment."

"Okay Sensei."

The rest of the drive everyone was quiet.

Donatello killed the lights and parked the Battle shell couple of blocks away from the hospital. He called Natalie to tell her that they arrived. They preferred the windows instead of the front door.

Too much risk, besides it was hospital and they couldn't risk a patient to see them and have a heart attack.

"Which floor?"

"Third. Room 307."

"There isn't any number on the windows you know."

"Okay, I'll just stick my head out of the window."

Soon Natalie waved at their direction. The three turtles and their Master climbed to the window in no time.

"Welcome to my world guys."

It was good to see Leonardo alive and breathing. Mikey was jumping from happiness, Donnie ran after him chuckling, happy for his brother.

Splinter spoke "Kids, don't mind their behavior."

"I don't mind. I hadn't felt this good for a long time."

"Thanks Nat." Said Raphael and hugged her. Natalie hugged him back, and she was surprised at the sudden expression of Raphael's feelings.

"You didn't see that coming from a hothead and impulsive teenage mutant ninja turtle did you Nat?"

"Now, you are reading my mind. I have to add that ability of yours in my list of things you do best."

"Oh, you keep a list, huh?"

"Nope, but I might as well do that one day."

"And I'll have to break into your home to steal it."

"And how do you think you can pull that off without setting the alarm on?"

"If I ever learned something sharing the same home as Donnie, there is how to turn off the alarms. You know, we ninjas need to be invisible when saving lives and stuff. The art of stealth. After I shut the alarm off, then (Raphael took out his sai and twirled it in his hand) I'll just pick the lock and home, sweet home."

"Detailed plan. Remind me why shouldn't I call the police in this instant?" Natalie smirked devilishly and got Raph's crooked smile in response

"You are too good of a person to send poor ol' Raphie in jail Nat."

"You are probably right. You don't mind?"

Raphael was surprised to see Natalie showing at his sai.

"One thing you need to learn about Raph, Natalie is never ever ask him to give you his weapons." Said Michelangelo, now sitting in a chair, Donnie next to him.

"Then I'll just have to take them."

"No need. Here." Raphael gave her both sais "But be careful, you can cut yourself..."

Raphael stopped in mid-sentence. "…with them." Natalie took the sais in her hands and twirled them like a pro. Everyone looked at her, amazed at the doctor they had met just today, but they felt safe with her like they knew each other since forever.

Even April was afraid when she first met them, Casey more angry than freaked out, but Natalie wasn't scared at all when she first saw them. She treated them like equal, not a feeling that was common in people for they thought they wore costumes.

"Wow, Nat where did you learn to...?"

"My Master taught me the art of ninjitsu. He also taught me how to use certain types of weapons."

"I don't wanna know which weapons." Said Donatello.

"There is enough time for us to discuss weapons and ninja training Donatello, but I'm afraid that will have to wait. We are here on Leonardo's behalf and I think that we need to make sure he is fully healed. Now if you'll excuse me I want to go home and get some rest. I'll be back in the morning. Now that I know my patient has a good people to watch over him, I can sleep better tonight."

"Bye Natalie. See you tomorrow." Said Donnie

"Bye guys."

"She is something isn't she?" Raphael said looking at the door where Natalie disappeared in the hall.

"Yes she is, my son. She is a very special person."

With that Raphael went at Leo's bedside watching his brother sleeping. It brought him peace 'cause he knew that Leo was now safe. Only if he knew who shot him...

Splinter sensed the boiling rage in Raphael and put his hand on his shoulder. "Remember son, patience is the clue. Be patient. We'll find out who did this to Leonardo. But now, let's just sit tight and look after him."

Another mind reader. _Great, just what I needed._

Guess I'm not the only one, Raphael thought. He slowly drifted to sleep.

...

 _-_ _The_ _next morning-_

"Wake up sleepy head." Raphael said as he shook Michelangelo that lay spread eagle on the couch.

"5 more minutes please..." Mikey pleaded with his brother.

"Mikey it's almost 6 a.m. We need to get out of here before anyone enters and sees us. We can come back later."

Mikey rubbed his eyes and looked at the worried face of his older brother. "Leo?"

"He's still out. Have been all night."

The door suddenly opened itself and Raphael jumped, prepared yo fight, but, it was Natalie who entered in the room. Raphael let out the breath that he wasn't aware he was holding in.

"Morning guys."

"Morning." They all answered in unison.

"Master Splinter." She bowed at him.

"Natalie..." He bowed back.

"Let's see how's our boy."

Natalie went all pro, checking his vitals.

Temperature was normal, his blood pressure was 130/80 and his heart beating was 65 bits per second.

"It seems like everything is all right. The swelling in the wound is fading slowly. He should be up in couple of hours."

Their previous conversation about leaving the hospital was left behind, because they were eager to see Leo open his eyes. They all wanted to know if Leo saw who shot him, and if he was aware of that even happening.

The waiting has begun.


	5. Somebody's watching

Chapter 5-Somwbody's watching

He slowly opened his eyes and saw his brothers, his father and an unknown woman at his bedside. She wore a white mantel over a navy blue dress, with a stethoscope over her neck. He concluded that she was a doctor. She had a warm smile spread over her face and for a moment he was having trouble to focus on his surroundings. He looked at all of them, but he couldn't figure our where he was, or why everybody looked so relieved.

"Where am I?"

"In a hospital."

"What happened?"

"You've been shot."

He looked more confused now than before. "I was shot? But, how?"

"We were hoping you may help us with that information Leo." Said Raph, slightly disappointed

Leo sensed the change in his brother and tried to get up. But as soon as he moved, his left arm screamed with pain and he felt slightly dizzy and nauseated.

"Take it easy Leonardo." He heard the doctor saying.

"What's your name?" He asked, all business now.

"Natalie. Natalie Akita. Nice to meet you Leonardo."

Leo shook her hand, and looked at her with his piercing eyes, like he was trying to get to the center of her soul. She seemed a nice person, but Leonardo wasn't convinced.

Natalie could feel the hostility radiating from Leonardo.

"She is okay Leo." Donatello said, behind Natalie, placing his hand on her shoulder "She saved your life. She is not an enemy. She is a friend."

Leonardo still looked like he wasn't here with his mind.

"Leo, listen we had no other choice than to bring you here. This time Donnie wasn't an option. Donnie is an engineer not a doctor, although he knows how to treat a wound if it's not serious. Even if he tried to operate the wound who guaranteed us that he was going to succeed? You could've died Leo. Natalie saved your life. Don't look at her like she is sent to end your life. She is here for you. We are here for you." Said Raphael.

It seemed like Leonardo was on another planet.

Raphael wasn't sure that his brother even registered their words. He hated when Leo went all quiet and distant which is what happened a lot lately. Even after he came back from Japan, even after all his talks with the Ancient One, there was still a little flame left where the old fire was burning, and Raphael hated that. He hated to see another incarnation of himself in his brother. The least his family needed was another Raphael.

Like one wasn't enough.

For a few moments no one spoke or made a sound. Suddenly someone knocked on the door and April's and Casey's heads popped up.

"Hi guys." Said April

"Hi April. Casey." Said Donatello.

"Hi Nat. It's been a long time." April said and exchanged a hug with Natalie.

"Too long." She replied.

Leonardo was watching the interaction between the two women, silently, but still his face expression hadn't changed. No one could convince Leonardo that Natalie was a friend.

After all what happened with Karai, he couldn't risk believing in someone like he once believed her. Look at where it got them. He wasn't aware that he was clutching his hand over the place where she stabbed him with his Katana, albeit unintentionally.

Natalie saw the look in his eye and wondered what happened with Leonardo that made him so wary with people. He seemingly enjoyed April and Casey being present in the room, but for some reason she suddenly felt like an outsider.

"I'll grab something to eat. You stay with Leonardo." Said Natalie and took off.

She couldn't understand why Leonardo was giving her cold feet when she made sure he lived. Yet, he reminded her of herself after her husband and daughter were killed. She was wary of new people. She still was, although there was something else in Leonardo. She could see it in his eyes. He was struggling. He wasn't sure which was right, and which was wrong. Was she who she said she was or she was just another mercenary sent to wipe them off of Earth's face? She could see the circles spinning in his head.

...

Leonardo's inner instinct told him that there was trouble in the hospital, but after witnessing April's and Natalie's hug he wasn't so sure that Natalie was the threat. But, he was stubborn as shell, and he wouldn't admit he wasn't right in his first assessment, so easily.

Someone very wise and astute once told him not to rely on the first impression, because sometimes you have to get to know someone as to actually know him. _"You know me, but you don't know my story."_ He always remembered those words. Never judge the book by its cover.

Donatello briefed him earlier that day about what happened and why they brought him in the hospital. He told him everything that happened in the last 24 hours. After couple of hours of talking (Leonardo mostly listening) the turtles and their Master went home to get some rest, and so did April and Casey. Leonardo was left all alone. All he could do was think over and over again of past events.

A pair of eyes was watching him from the half closed door. "Soon. Soon it will be your end." The feminine voice was saying with a slight chuckle.

At that moment a cold wind entered in his room through the open window and sent shivers through his spine. Leonardo snapped his eyes open, aware that someone was watching him. He felt cold, and it wasn't from the wind...


	6. sometimes Turtles Can be Wrong

Chapter 6-Sometimes turtles can be wrong

The next few days went well. Leo's wound was healing properly. But, sadly his behaviour hadn't changed.

It was Wednesday, and after his last check up, Natalie believed that Leonardo will be ready to go home. His attitude towards her hadn't changed and he spoke with her exclusively when she checked on his wound, or when she brought him food.

But, that afternoon happened something that told Leonardo for sure that Natalie was a friendly person and that she was okay.

"If your last check up is completely okay you'll be able to go home."

"Finally." Leonardo growled.

Natalie checked the wound one more time and she noticed something she hadn't seen before. She saw that Leonardo's shell was parched on the left side. Suddenly she sensed Leo's gaze leveled at her.

"What?"

"I just noticed something. Your shell's been broken and repaired."

"Yes it was."

"Actually a piece is missing…" she spoke more to herself than to him.

Leonardo twitched at the sudden mentioning of his shell and Natalie asked herself what was that happened that broke his shell.

"You want to tell me what happened?"

"No." Leonardo stated with great confidence.

Suddenly he became very agitated and took her by the arm. He squeezed her arm very tight and Natalie almost screamed. She locked her eyes with Leonardo's. His look was fierce and determined.

"Let me go, it hurts."

"Who are you Natalie?" He growled

"I'm a doctor. Which, by the way saved your life."

"I don't believe you." He sent daggers her way. He took her by surprise when he did that sudden move with her arm.

"I don't give a damn if you believe me or not. Now, let me go!" Natalie yelled and managed to pull her arm out of his deadly grip.

Leonardo was very weak when he was brought in the hospital, but he was gaining his strength step by step. Even at 80% recovery, the force with which Leonardo held Natalie's arm was enormous and when she pulled her arm a piece of her mantel fabric was torn. It revealed an ugly scar that covered Natalie's left arm.

She noticed the look of awe on Leonardo's face and she immediately knew that he wasn't himself when he did what he did couple of minutes ago.

"I'm so sorry Natalie. I don't know what got into me. I didn't mean to..."

"It's okay, I know." She said tears glistening in her eyes.

She saw recognition in his eyes and she quietly sat in the chair next to his bed. Leonardo nodded in approval.

For a few moments neither of them spoke.

Leonardo broke the silence. "I know the creature that leaves... left those exact kind of scars."

"You... But how?"

"I was the one that lead my family when we finally defeated him. Let's just say that he hurt my family too much, beginning with my Master's Master."

"He killed my family. The Shredder. He killed my husband and my daughter. I survived."

"I'm sorry."

Natalie somehow felt that Leonardo was sorry for more than just her tragedy.

"I'm sorry I treated you like the enemy, but I once believed a woman, that was raised by the Shredder. I believed she had honor, that she was truthful to what she felt was the right thing to do, but it turned out to be another lie. She betrayed me, so easily. That's why I reacted that way when I first saw you."

"You are talking about Karai right?"

"Yes. How do you know about her?"

"Let's just say that I've got information that she is the one that leads the Foot clan now, after the Shredder's demise."

Absentmindedly Leonardo clutched his hand on the spot where she stabbed him.

"Whenever you feel uncomfortable you clutch your hands on your belly." Leonardo looked at her questionably "I've seen you doing that multiple times. Something bad, huh?"

"Yes. It was almost a year ago. We were on the ship that the Shredder built from the Triceraton technology that was left on Earth after their invasion. We climbed on the ship right after it took off and we tried to stop the Shredder from invading the planet of the Utroms. But that's a story for another day. We fought with the Shredder and Karai. My brothers and Master Splinter were busy with the Shredder. I was fighting with Karai. Suddenly she slipped over the edge. I gave her a hand."

"It was your honor that told you to save her. It would've been wrong if you just left her to die."

"If Raphael hears you talking about honor and the Bushido code..."

"We sorted that out." Natalie said with a smirk.

"So you are something like an angel right? Coming to the rescue of one turtle, but you end up healing all of the others?"

"You could say that."

"Right after I saved her from the mortal fall she took my sword. The Shredder kicked me viciously. That blow sent me right in Karai's way. She held my sword forward and the sword hit me right here. I still feel the pain whenever I remember that day."

"Sorry to hear that."

"I was so mad after we were saved by the Utroms and the reign of the Shredder, the evil Utrom by the name of Ch'rell that took the identity and body of Oroku Saki was finally over. I started to look more like Raphael than myself. I was mad because I thought that I failed my family. I always thought that I could've done something more. We were all injured, and I blamed myself for what happened to them, what happened to me. I trained when I shouldn't have done that. I pushed myself hard, and I almost went over the edge. I wasn't thinking straight. I was like raging bull. And then one day after the hundredth complaint Raph made about my behavior Master Splinter sent me in Japan. There I learned that I did all things possible to protect my family. There was no other way for the things to happen. I was there for like two months when the Ancient One, the Master of my Master's Master..."

Natalie's brow furrowed.

"... told me that my family was in danger. That's when I learned that our old lair has been destroyed and that Karai was behind the attack."

Leonardo stopped talking and took Natalie's hand in his hands and squeezed it reassuringly.

"I want you to know that I'm sorry I acted like an ass before. I don't know what else to do to show you I really regret the way I treated you. I believe in you now, and know that you are not the enemy. Whenever you have the need to talk to me, I'll be there for you. I'm in a great debt with you. I don't know if I would be able to repay your kindness and patience."

"Promise me that you'll always be Leonardo. Don't you ever change, no matter what. You have a gentle personality, you are kind and wise. You know well with people, and you know how to keep your cools, anyway. You are also bossy, stubborn, fearless, brave, disciplined, thoughtful, rational, patient and caring turtle. I know what are you going to say, that I don't know you very long and most of what I said it's nonsense, but believe me Leonardo I do know what I'm saying and it's the truth. You are all of the above and much more. Just looking at you gives me peace and strength. If anyone is in a debt, then that's me. You helped me realize things I hadn't realized before, without knowing that you were helping me and for that I will be eternally grateful. There's no problem that hasn't been solved in life, except death Leonardo. We just have to find a way to solve it. I believe that you can overcome what's in your head that makes you angry, by yourself or with the help of others. If you need a talk, just call okay?"

"Okay."

"Now, if you'll excuse me I have to go and see my other patients, but I'll be back to you soon. Then we can call the others."

"Deal."

Leo smiled for the first time after he'd been admitted to the hospital. He finally was able to relax in the company of the doctor he was so afraid to even speak.

Her words touched him and Leonardo felt a tear slipping from his eye after she left. It was strange, how complete strangers that hadn't known each other for so long, it felt like they've known each other their whole life. The tragedy that both of them survived opened Leonardo's eyes. But the danger was lurking from near and Leonardo could feel it. It was close, in the hospital.

He needed to get out of there as soon as possible.


	7. Something's wrong

Chapter 7-Something is wrong

We all come to this world with a mission. We are individuals. We live alone, but sometimes we act in groups. We are born alone, we live the life with our soulmate and create a family, and die, again alone.

No matter what, we are all important cells of the society. If it isn't for us then the world can't function. We people, are the ones that trace the path to the stars. We people, are the ones that make the difference. Because we people, are destined to find our mission in this world. Some people's mission is greater than the other's. But, greater or smaller mission, we all have one.

.And we have to carry it out till our last breath, till our eyes close for one last journey... To Heaven or Hell.

That was what Natalie was thinking about when she finished with her check up on the other patients before finally coming back to Leonardo. The conversation she had with the turtle gave her the encouragement she needed. She was more determined in herself now than she ever was in her life. And all because of few words, sentences that were spoken by a mutated turtle.

She promised that she would call his brothers and tell them about his state and that they could take him home that exact night, but what she found when she entered in his room shocked her.

Leonardo was lying on the bed, sleeping and it seemed like he was heavily sedated. She noticed a mark on his right arm where the vein crossed his elbow. She sensed presence beside her that was like the wind. She felt cold and fear overwhelmed her. It sent shivers throughout her body.

She turned behind her just to see her personal assistant smiling weird. That's right, her smile was weird.

"He was agitated Ms. Akita. He talked about leaving the hospital and he claimed that he needs to get to his brothers before they were hurt. He claimed they were in danger. He screamed and scared few other patients. I had to give him a mild sedative. He should be able to come through by the end of this night."

Natalie doubted what Lucy was telling her to be true, but she nodded and dismissed her.

Natalie had an ability to double check everything even when it was safe. That's what she did with the room after Lucy left. She checked every inch of the room and besides the steady rhythm of Leonardo's breathing there was no other sound in the room. Complete silence. It was quiet, maybe two quiet.

...

Two meters ahead of where her feet were placed in the moment there was a syringe that was previously filled with a very potent tranquilizer, the amount of it was enormous and it could put a horse in a deep sleep, one way sleep. But, the person that injected that tranquilizer in Leonardo's vein knew that already. She craved for the small victory. She did this for her Master, for her boss. She did this for the man that took her under his wing when everybody ditched her. And teached her the basics on how to live a life without honor.

But she forgot small teeny tiny thingy. The syringe fell from the tray when she heard footsteps near the room where Leonardo was placed and she lost eyes of it.

...

Natalie casted one final look on Leonardo and she decided to call Donatello and explain the strange situation.

"What do you say Donnie?"

"At this point I don't know anything Nat. We will come by later and see what we can do then."

"Okay."

Soon after the phone call Natalie was called in the OR, a car crash with three perons injured severely. She was as far as she could be from Leonardo. It was like someone really wanted her to stay out of their way. Even the destiny

...

Lucy wasn't that good of a person as Natalie thought. Just when she overheard the conversation that the turtles were ready to be headed for the hospital tonight, she called Hun and alerted him that Leonardo was going to be all alone for a very short time.

It was the opportunity her boss was waiting, since the turtles attacked the convoy with the stolen weapons. He was planning on revenge, but waited for the turtles to get on their feet after Karai destroyed their lair. Leonardo was the perfect victim, plus he was the leader. If he wanted to make something out of his revenge he had to go to the leader first. _If you want to weaken the team, always take out the leader first._

"Say farewell to your brothers Leonardo. Tonight it will be your last day on Earth." Said Hun as he prepared a small team of three Purple Dragons.

He was well aware of the state Leonardo was in (he was the one that ordered Lucy to sedate him) and he couldn't let this opportunity go away that easily. But, other than revenge, Hun had another reason why he chose Leonardo first.

A week ago Leonardo witnessed the meeting that happened between him and one of the few men left from the underground that kept the business of illegal arms dealing under wraps in front of NYPD's noses. Worse, he now knew his name.

Mr. Grey. He always wore grey costumes. It was that why he was called Mr. Grey. He was in his mid forties and ran this business till he was 23, right after his father was killed in a shootout. He preferred to keep his work on the down low and found few secret channels that provided him with the opportunities he craved for an illegal business. Of course on the outside everything was clean as a whistle. No one knew his real identity and it stayed that way for a very long time. Until last week. Working with the Purple Dragons, he knew he made the worst mistake in his life, but the benefit was mutual.

...

Leonardo never felt what was going out around him. He was heavily sedated and out for almost three hours. Lucy turned off the cameras long enough for Hun and his team to enter in the hospital, get the job done and get out. Without being noticed, of course. Hun took Leonardo in his arms careful not to damage the turtle too much. He and his associate needed him in a great shape for what they had in store for him. The plan went well and 10 minutes later everything was back to normal.

...

Donatello was busy with a new project in his lab and he hadn't noticed that it was almost 9 a.m. when he got out of it.

"What's up guys?"

"I don't know. Natalie isn't answering on her cell phone." Said Raphael

"She works in a hospital remember Raph? She can't pick up her phone whenever she likes."

"Even after 29 missed calls?"

"How many? Raph she'll think of the worse when she sees her phone log. Have you tried Leo?"

"Yes. He doesn't answer his phone too."

"That's strange. Let me call him."

Donatello tried, but no one picked up. He went to his computer and when he looked at his tracker he saw something that scared him. The signal from Leo's shell cell wasn't coming from the hospital, but from a warehouse.

"Hey guys we have a problem."

"Oh-oh." Mikey said

"What kind of problem Donnie?"

"Good news is that Natalie's cell phone is still in the hospital which means she is probably there. Bad news is that Leo's shell cell isn't in the hospital anymore."

"How's that possible?"

"I don't know. I suggest we go to the hospital as we planned and try to make sense out of this situation."

Two heads nodded in agreement to what Donatello said, and ran to the Battle shell, unaware of their Master watching them from above where his room was.

He felt something was wrong. Splinter hated being right about bad things.


	8. There is always worse

Chapter 8-There is always worse

* * *

 _ **Since the timeline of this story is after they defeated the Shredder, and after Karai destroyed their lair, this story takes place somewhere in the spring/summer of 2006. As you may know, Criminal Minds star**_ _ **t**_ _ **ed in 2005 and it was**_ _ **at**_ _ **its first season that year, that's why I reference CM as the series that just started and I compared Don with Garcia.**_

 _ **As for the route to the place where Leo**_ _ **was**_ _ **held, I used Google maps because I don't live in NY, and I certainly don't know how the streets go**_ _ **in their particular order**_ _ **, and I needed it in order to write this chapter. I found warehouses and I compared the locations and I found that two of them were owned by the same company which was used as an example for the purposes of my story. Next chapter will have more of what happened with Leo while his family and friends were trying to find him.**_

 _ **Enjoy.**_

* * *

…

Donatello drove like crazy through town. When he finally parked the truck both Raph and Mikey were looking sick, with a shade or two greener. But they agreed with their brother's driving. They were worried too.

They waited for a couple of minutes before they entered in the hospital through the well known path. When they entered, they found an empty bed. That's when Natalie entered in the room.

"Hey Leonardo you awake?"

She stopped when she saw the empty bed. Then she saw the turtles.

"Guys where is Leonardo?"

"We were going to ask you the same question Natalie." Said Raphael.

"I had an emergency call. When I left Leonardo was asleep. We talked a little, but when I came back he was sedated."

"Who sedated him?"

"Me."

"And who are you, Miss?"

"I'm Lucy. I'm Ms. Akita's assistant. Leonardo was agitated and I gave him a sedative so he can sleep and rest."

"And who exactly said you should do that without your superior's orders Miss?" Asked Raphael.

"I assessed the situation and acted on it immediately."

Raphael didn't believe her, nor did Natalie.

"God, I should've never left him alone." Said Natalie.

"You are a doctor Nat. You were doing your job. One of us should've stayed with him at all times." Said Donatello

"Still. He was my responsibility. How did this happen?" Natalie said and turned her back to the turtles.

She shed silent tears. She never felt like this before she met Leonardo. She cared for him, and now he was gone, taken from her. Just like her family.

She shouldn't let this happen. She became emotionaly attached to Leonardo and look where it got her.

At the corner of the room Lucy was smiling inside from the scene that unfolded in front of her eyes. Natalie and the turtles asking where Leonardo was, what happened to him. And the only one that knew where he was, was in front of their noses. What fools, she thought.

"It's like a curse. Everyone that I know goes away. Or is taken from me."

"Don't beat yourself up Nat." Said Mikey

"We'll find him. He couldn't have gotten far." Said Raph, placing a hand on her shoulder.

"His shell cell signal is not moving." Donnie said.

"He didn't exactly flew over the hospital." Said Raphael in angry voice.

"It can't be. I gave him a sedative that put him to sleep." Said Lucy "Even if he wanted to leave the hospital without your knowledge, he couldn't have gotten far."

"But, how the shell he managed to get to the industrial part of New York if he...?"

Natalie sensed the fear in Raphael's voice.

"The only logical explanation is that someone took him. Not by his will." Said Natalie, voicing Raphael's thoughts.

"And the only way to find out that is to trace that signal." Said Donatello.

"This is all my fault. If he gets hurt, I won't forgive myself."

"It's not your fault. Whoever took him, would've taken him even with you in the room. There are plenty of bad guys that want to take us out and they won't stop at anything to get what they want." Said Raphael.

"Raph is right Natalie." Said Donatello.

"He was taken while on my watch and I'm coming with you. I need to help him." Said Natalie.

"No way. Whoever has our brother is sure as shell dangerous. I don't wanna risk your life. Besides you don't have a weapon with you. Almost every guy we fight has weapons. You can get yourself killed" Said Raphael.

"You have a spare double Katana?" Natalie asked with a crooked smile.

"Yep, in the Battle shell." Chimed Donnie, catching up on the glint in Natalie's eyes.

"Then I'm not weaponless." She said and took the lead.

"Man, Katana? You sure you met Leo for the first time when you came to our lair?" Asked Michelangelo which earned him a slap on the head by Raphael.

"Ow!"

"Sure Michelangelo. Besides I trained martial arts when I was just a little girl, like I told you before. I still do train sometimes. It was a long time ago that I had a chance to hold a Katana as perfect as the one Leonardo carries. And I had a nice Master, till he died however."

"What was his name?" Asked Donatello, always curious.

Natalie's answer froze them in place.

"Hamato Yoshi."

"Whaaa...?"

"She can tell us everything later Raph. Now we have to get to Leo before the ones that have him hurt him more than he already is." Donatello interrupted Raphael.

"Lucy you can go home now. I'll call you if I need you." Said Natalie.

"Okay Ms. Akita. Good night and good luck."

"Good night and thanks."

It was like the universe made a conspiracy against their conversation about martial arts and weapons. Every time they started taking about it, something popped up.

...

Right after the three turtles and Natalie left the hospital, Lucy dialed Hun's number and told him that they were headed to the place where Hun was with a bunch of Purple Dragons. Everything was pre-planned and so far the plan was working. Hun was grateful to know he had the head start.

At first they brought the turtle there, but then their plan changed. Mr. Grey called and told him the new plan. Leonardo was long gone, but his shell cell sealed the deal. Now the four member (3+1) crew was headed into a trap.

...

Donatello pressed the gas pedal and the Battle shell roared with life. They followed the signal of the shell cell that wasn't moving for over two hours now. The address was an abandoned warehouse for almost 5 years. It was located in the industrial part of New York City. Don killed the lights and parked the vehicle on the back of the warehouse.

"Are you sure this is the right address Don?" Asked Raphael.

"Yes. The tracker says that the place from where the shell cell signal is coming from is this particular warehouse on 10th Street."

"Damn, this warehouse is big." Said Mikey.

"Yup. But, I don't know. It's too obvious. The warehouse is in plain sight. Something isn't right. It's almost like they wanted us here." Said Donatello.

And he hadn't the slightest idea that what he said was right.

"It's worth the try." Said Natalie.

They snuck behind the far wall on the right side which was their entry card. The left side was closed from the outside with a chain link fence. The windows were tinted, some of them broken, but you actually had to get in, if you wanted to see what was in there. There were two exit doors, but only one way in. Through the front door.

Donatello was trying to come up with a plan. Usually Leo was the guy that always had a plan on his mind, but he was the one they were after so the others had to do the thinking.

Raphael, the hothead wanted to get through the front door and kick serious butt, but Michelangelo stopped him.

"Raph, don't." He said.

"Argh, I hate when you sound like Leo, Mikey."

Mikey just smiled and was happy that for once Raphael was actually listening and not acting on his own.

Natalie scanned the surroundings and was thinking of a way in. Together with Don's calculations of probability and their chances of escape they came up with a plan. A simple plan with plenty to go wrong.

Natalie and Raphael went on the left side and Donatello and Michelangelo on the right. They opened the front door carefully and snuck in without anybody seeing them. They split up. The warehouse was full of debris, empty boxes and smelled like no one entered in it for a very long time.

Then they saw Hun and 15 Purple Dragons thugs with baseball bats and metal pipes in their hands. It was then when Raphael jumped from the shadows. He thrusted one of his sai into Hun's left arm and he screamed in pain. _When did they turned 15? They were 3 just few minutes ago._

"You Freak!"

"Yeah, it's me, your worst nightmare. I came here to take my brother back you animal."

"Your brother isn't here Freak!"

"Then where is he?"

"Someplace where you can't find him."

"Yo Raph, on your six!" Natalie yelled.

Raphael was able to duck the blow from a baseball bat and send the Purple Dragon wielding it, half across the warehouse.

Mikey had three Purple Dragons on the floor and had trouble fighting the fourth when one of Donnie's shuriken run into his flesh and he dropped to his feet, screaming.

"Thanks Don."

"You are welcome Mikey."

Donatello took out half dozen of Purple Dragons while Natalie took out five.

They all watched as Raphael was fighting with Hun that even badly wounded, was still on his feet. They came to help him just when Hun kicked Raph in the stomach and he dropped on the floor like a sack full of potatoes. He stifled a scream, biting his lip, trying to stay conscious, overwhelming pain coursing through his entire body like a lightning bolt. The blow took the air out of his lungs. A spasm passed through his stomach that took the bile up in his throat.

Hun was almost on top of Raph and took him by his throat. Raph looked at him with his unfocused eyes and Natalie was scared for him. Donatello and Michelangelo froze in place when they looked at Hun holding their brother.

Natalie had a brief flashback of the day the Shredder killed her family. Hun was there, too. The blonde moving mountain that held Raphael in his hands, was there. He watched and didn't do a thing to prevent what happened to her family. She yelled and suddenly swiped the Katana over Hun sending him momentarily on the floor at the same time Raphael made a loud thump on the floor where he landed for the second time and she saw Donnie helping him to get on his feet.

"Who are you?" Hun asked the woman with curly black hair that held Katana swords in her hands.

"Your worst nightmare."

"You even sound the same as that Freak!" Said Hun.

Natalie was unaware that she said the same thing that Raph said when he first started fighting Hun. Obviously he forgot about her. But she remembered.

She charged him with her right hand. She was lefty, but she favored her right side in battle. She sliced through Hun's already hurt left hand. But, he was still standing. He swung with his other hand and sent Natalie flying across the warehouse. She landed on some of the cardboard boxes, the swords still clutched in her hands, tightly. Hun, thinking that he eliminated the woman attacked the turtles. They all took turns fighting him, even Raphael that had trouble breathing and a sprained ankle from the fall. Hun's strength expired slowly and he wasn't able to duck the blows that came his way. He was attacking them with all the strength that was left in him, but it wasn't enough to stop them from fighting him.

It seemed like the fight was endless, both sides held their grounds.

Just when Hun thought that he may actually have a chance to win this one and beat the turtles, something that his former Master, the Shredder wasn't able to do, Natalie came from behind him, kicking and slashing. She yelled, and even screamed some words that made the turtles to get back and retreat from the one-on-one fight that unfolded in front of their eyes.

"You son of a bitch! You were there, you Freak! You were there and you didn't move a finger to help my family. You watched, you son of a bitch! You watched! I won't let you get away so easily. You hurt my family or my friends and you'll pay for it. Now face the consequences!"

Natalie Akita was on a whole different level, her eyes had deadly look in them. The turtles were slightly scared.

...

By the time Natalie was finished, she was panting and was shaking badly. She hadn't noticed that she was crying, the hot tears falling on her shirt. Three turtles were watching what unfolded in front of them and they didn't say a word. The gentle doctor that saved their brother, killed the man that was responsible for Leonardo's kidnapping. The only connection they had whatsoever with finding him was now dead, lying on the ground motionless. The man responsible for so many troubled days and nights was now finished for good. But, they were happy they got out of there alive.

Natalie found a barrel full of water and cleaned the blood that covered the swords. She regretted that she bloodied the swords that belonged to Leonardo. She sheathed the swords and got out of the warehouse, more running than walking. A thought coursed through her mind as to why a warehouse that was abandoned for five years had a barrel full of water that looked fresh. But, she dismissed it, thinking that she was probably overreacting.

...

She sensed a presence. Donatello stood next to her.

"Thank you."

"For what?"

"For saving our shells. If it weren't for you, he might've killed us."

"I couldn't let him get to you. When the Shredder killed my family, he was there, you know. He watched the whole thing and didn't say a thing. He practically let them do everything they wanted to. I couldn't let him kill you. I don't want to lose my second family. My new friends."

Don was overwhelmed by Natalie's words. He looked in her dark brown eyes, the color of chocolate, and saw all of the pent up emotions in them. He didn't dare to ask about her family's death.

"I'm well aware that I ruined the only possible lead to Leonardo. I'm sorry."

"You did the right thing Natalie. All you did was defending yourself and us, and you did great. Someone needed to put a stop on Hun and the Purple Dragons. I'm sorry that it had to be you."

"I'm a doctor, I should save lives, and I just took one. What kind of person am I Donatello?"

"A good one."

"Why do you say that?"

"Because if you didn't give a damn about what you just did I was going to say that you were willing to kill anytime. But, your reaction, the fact that you question your actions, and you have regrets, tells me that you are a good person. Rational person. You are not like them. You are so much better than them."

Donatello hugged her.

"Hey Donnie!" Raphael yelled from inside the warehouse.

"What Raph?"

"You have to see this!"

"What's that?"

"Hun's cell phone. It might help us discover where Leo is."

"You are right Raph. Now let's get out of here before someone shows up."

"They'll pay for what they did." Spit Raphael.

He favored his right leg and limped heavily. He was on the verge of tears, this situation taking the best of him, but he managed to calm down.

"Hey Raph, we'll find him."

"I'm not so sure now."

"Never lose hope. Here give me a hand."

Natalie helped him to get to the Battle shell.

"Now let me see that ankle of yours." Natalie looked at it and with only one twist she made it right.

"Ow, that hurts!" Yelled Raph through greeted teeth.

"It hurts, but it's effective. Here, your ankle is fixed. And you are welcome."

The rest of the drive to the lair was spent in silence, everyone with their own thoughts.

...

This time Mikey drove the Battle shell while the rest of the crew was out back. Donatello called April and requested her help. Her previous work at "Stocktronics" alongside Stockman was proving to be worth in many cases through the years. She helped him hack into Shredder's lair couple of years back, and she provided tech knowledge to Don, that improved his skills on everyday basis. Now it was the right time to use them again.

The one thing Don needed to complete this action, was a software that will help him to go through the phone logs and messages and find out if possibly Hun had help while taking Leonardo or if the location is written out there somewhere and waiting for them to be discovered.

...

"Hey April."

"Hey Don. I'm so sorry for what happened guys."

"Thank you April. Did you get your laptop and the cable I requested?"

"Yup. It took me awhile to find the one you needed. Now all we have to do is to download the software and then connect the cell with the system."

While they waited for the software to download itself, Donatello made a fresh pot of coffee. It seemed like they would be up for the whole night and they needed something to help them stay awake.

Natalie came to the room, her hair loose and dirty from the fight she went into. Her shirt was torn at few places and she looked like she could use a shower. Earlier that night on their way back she called her supervisor and told him that she will take few days off. The events from the past couple of hours told her that it was time for her to take a break from her job. She witnessed the harshness with which her new friends were treated and that opened her eyes. Nearly death experience gave her the strength she needed to face her fears.

Raphael went to his room and closed the door. His leg was getting better. He didn't say a word on their way back.

She spent 10 minutes convincing Mikey to go to bed and rest. He didn't want to in case they found where Leo was, but she played on the Leonardo card, as to what would Leo say about going in a battle unprepared. The longer she knew the turtles, the better Natalie understood that all her predicaments were right about them. Sadly, she found similarities with herself, and with her late daughter. Lately she thought of her kid most of the time.

...

"Hey Nat, want some coffee?"

"Yes." She said yawning.

"Maybe you should take a nap."

"I'm fine Donatello!" She snapped "Sorry Don. It's just..."

"It's okay Nat. Really."

"Okay."

Natalie sipped from the coffee and tried to relax. She never saw April approaching her.

"Hey Nat, how you've been?"

"Well I've seen better days, but I think I'll survive."

"Don told me what happened. If you need a talk sometimes, just call."

"Thanks April."

"What happened to us?"

"What do you mean?"

"We were best friends. Where did we do wrong?"

"Our paths parted April. But, I'll be more than happy to get back to the old days."

"Me too. Maybe this is the chance that both of us were waiting for."

"Maybe." April squeezed Natalie's shoulder. "You can find spare clothes in the guest room which is right over there on the left. When I do a sleepover I want to have some clothes here, that's why I brought some of them here, to my second home. You can take a shower and get some rest."

"After what happened tonight, I don't think that I'll be able to sleep April. But, thanks for the talk. It's good to know that I'm not alone."

"You are welcome."

After the hot shower and the second cup of coffee Natalie felt better and went to the kitchen in an attempt to eat something. She realized she hadn't eaten since breakfast. She came back to the living room to help Donnie and April anyway she could.

...

They hadn't had the heart to tell Splinter what happened. But the old rat knew something was wrong and came to the living room. When he spoke he startled all three of them.

"Where is Leonardo my son?"

"Um, Master Splinter, Leo... Um, Leo... Leo was taken."

"What do you mean taken?"

"He was taken by Hun and the Purple Dragons, but when we went to take him back he wasn't there. Now we are looking for clues as to who has Leo and where he is."

"Donatello, I thought you said that the Purple Dragons had him."

"Yeah, well it's not like we can ask them where Leo is held. They took off. As for Hun, he can't talk right now. He is dead."

"Dead?"

"Sensei, please sit down, I will explain everything to you."

Splinter couldn't believe his ears, the good doctor that saved his eldest son, now killed to save his other three sons. He knew that killing wasn't a noble and honored thing to do, but in this case it was self defense and it was the right thing that had to be done in order to a catastrophe to be prevented.

"I'm sorry to hear that you had to do that Ms. Akita. You stood up for my sons, and I am grateful for that. Not many people would've done what you did. Not many people stood up for us against our enemies in the past except Ms. O'Neill and Mr. Jones. To them we are freaks, tengu, demons. You on the other hand don't mind taking to mutated rat and turtles."

"Thank you Sensei. It's been an honor to fight along with your sons that are extremely skilled ninjas. You should be proud of them. It's all my fault that Leonardo was taken and I'll do everything that's in my power to help the guys in their rescue mission."

"The enemy is very powerful Ms. Akita. If they wanted to take my son, they would've done it either way. You don't need to feel guilty. Let me tell you the story of Leonardo, when he first met Oroku Saki, a.k.a. the Shredder. He made my son believe that he was the good guy and tried to convince him to work alongside him. My son came to me for advice. I told him the story of my Master Yoshi's demise. The next thing I know is that my sons are out there fighting with him. I told them not to do that, but they went against my orders, like they always did. Acting on their sheer thought that they could actually go against the Shredder." Splinter smiled sadly. "Maybe they didn't understand the part where I said 'armor' and 'steel' I guess." He chuckled now, but his throat burned with the worry about Leonardo and the tears stuck there. But, he couldn't show weakness now. "Since then the Shredder was determined to eradicate us. We were thorn in his sight for a long time."

"I have to tell you Sensei, that it was a great honor to know Master Yoshi."

"You knew him?"

"Yes. He was my Master. He taught me the secrets of Martial arts. Whenever I went to Japan, while I was little he would teach me new things. After he came to NYC to serve as a Guardian, we didn't see each other too much, but I found my own ways to keep learning new things."

"After this is over I want you to tell me everything Ms. Akita."

"Of course Sensei. And thank you for the story."

Donatello interrupted their conversation when he spoke one of his thoughts aloud "I still don't get how they knew where Leo was? I mean it's not like we announced that our brother is in a hospital."

"Yeah. It's like they knew where he was, they used Leonardo's current state and the fact that I've been busy to complete their plan. It's like they almost knew what was happening at every moment. Like they had a man on the inside the whole time."

"You know, you could be right."

April interrupted their conversation with the announcement that the software was downloaded.

"I'm coming!" Said Donatello

He took Hun's phone and plugged the cable to it then inserted the cable in the laptop through the USB port. He quickly opened up the phone logs. Like he expected, they were coded numbers and names. It took him awhile to get to all of the names and the number matching them. None of them seemed suspicious and Don let them go, but there were two numbers that he couldn't crack and it bugged him. By the time he finished with the numbers it was 3 a.m. He sensed that his brothers and father were all looking at him, waiting for good news. April left earlier to get Casey down there. The turtles needed all the help they could get and they needed a strategy as for when they were going to save Leo.

...

It was painstakingly long waiting, but finally Don got hold on information about the owner on one of the two remaining phone numbers. It belonged to certain Travis Jensen. He had an interesting past and Don made a mental note to himself to check on him later when he finished with the messages. He was yawning and trying to hold his eyes open.

"Hey Donnie why don't you go and get some rest. I can lend you some help with your investigation."

"No, I'm fine. It's just this damn phone number. I can't crack the code and get to the owner's name!"

"Can I?" Natalie asked

"Go ahead!" Said Donatello, almost angry.

"Donnie maybe you should listen to Natalie. Go and get some sleep. If there is anything new we'll wake you up." Said Raphael.

"Yeah Donnie. Please." Mikey pleaded with his older brother.

"Okay. I'll go."

It was tough to convince Donatello to take some rest, but he listened, for Leo's sake.

...

Natalie was typing on the keyboard in an attempt to find something in the messages that Hun sent and received in the last week and counting. So far nothing came up. Other than the regular fights that the Purple Dragons had in their loft and the regular calls between Hun and some of his associates nothing came up. Then Natalie remembered the phone number Don told her about. She opened the phone log and looked at it. It was marked in red. When she saw the sequence of numbers she almost dropped the laptop out of her hands. She recognized the number. She knew that number very well.

…

It was 12 p.m. and it was very hot outside. It was Friday and the forecast said that this weekend the temperature would pop up to 40 degrees Celsius. It was strange for that to happen in New York City. Natalie was in the car, blue Chevrolet Malibu, unmarked. April was on the passenger seat and Casey was on the backseat. They were in the car for over two hours on a stakeout.

On the other side of the street in a reverse position the Battle shell was parked. Donatello on the driver's seat, Raphael on the passenger's seat, Splinter and Mikey on the back. They grew restless and they were hungry for action. They were disguised, as it was a daylight and they couldn't risk to be seen in public.

Finally the door of the apartment building opened up and the person they were waiting for came out. Natalie stepped out of the car.

She wore tight black jeans, a blue T-shirt and blue snickers. She put on her sunglasses. Her hair was loose.

Natalie took big steps towards the building. Lucy didn't see it coming. The place was crowded, so Lucy didn't stand a chance against Natalie that held a gun to her back and forced her to enter in the Malibu. There Casey cuffed Lucy. Natalie put the Malibu in gear and drove towards the train station, the Battle shell following them close behind. When they arrived, Natalie pulled the Malibu to the parking lot and took Lucy to the Battle shell, April and Casey following.

"Why are you doing this to me?"

"Why? You dare to ask why you traitor?!"

"What are you taking about? I don't understand Ms. Akita."

"Stop pretending, will ya?" Raph yelled "We know you helped Hun to kidnap our brother. The sooner you tell us where he is, the better for you."

"I don't know where he is. I found out he was missing at the same time you did."

"Don't lie to me Lucy." Natalie growled "Or should I say Melinda."

"Now, where is my brother?" Raphael growled

It was like he and Natalie were playing "The Good Cop and The Bad Cop".

"You have no right to do this. As soon as I get out of here I'll call the police."

"No way. And what exactly are you going to say to NYPD Lucy?"

"That you kidnapped me and that you tried to kill me."

"And you think they'll believe you? Haha, three turtles and a rat, they'll think that you are crazy."

"I will tell them that you took me against my will. You are human after all."

"And you will risk your future? 'Cause I can easily call them right now and tell them about you. Who you really are. Your real identity. That you are Melinda Swanson, wanted for attempt of murder on her own father at the age of 12. 15 years is a long time to hide Luce, but the charge is still there. One call and you go to jail. Just think about it."

"Your brother deserved what he got." She said to Raphael.

"Where is he?!" Insisted Raph "What happened to him?"

"I won't tell you."

"Hun is dead Lucy. No one's out there to help ya. You have no way out. Save yourself and tell us where Leonardo is."

"What? How? But he was alive just yesterday."

"Well, he is not anymore."

"He was like my father. He found me and took me under his wing after I tried to kill the bastard. I served him. He taught me everything I know. He supported me. He loved me."

"Yeah, well last night I had the chance to meet his bad side and I didn't liked it at all Lucy."

She didn't reveal her past to Lucy.

"He worked for the Shredder for God's sake. How could you serve to such a monster?"

"Fuck you!" Lucy yelled.

"Tell us where is Leonardo?!"

"Never!"

"Okay. Donnie call the police."

"Got it."

Donatello dialed the number, but stopped halfway through when Lucy started talking.

"He is in a warehouse in Staten Island, on Forest Avenue. I'll give you the address and everything, but don't call the police."

There was something in Lucy that was disturbing, but Natalie couldn't determine what it was. Lucy scribbled something on a paper and gave it to Natalie.

"May I go now?"

"Sure, and never come back. I don't tolerate betrayal Lucy. I trusted you and you used my kindness. That's the one thing I cannot forgive."

"It's been nice working with you Ms. Akita." Lucy just smiled and left the Battle shell.

"She is a freak." Said Raphael "She is plain nuts. You see the way she is talking like she owns New York City or something? In one moment she is pleading, in the other she is denying. And did you see that devilish smile? She creeps me out. She is like a sociopath and psychopath in one."

"You are not the only one with those thoughts Raph. I can't believe we worked side by side for two years. I trusted her. And she did this to me. I'm glad she's gone. (Pause) God knows what happened to Leonardo. He is missing more than 12 hours."

"18 hours exactly." Said Donatello "I checked the shell cell signal. Started moving at 6 p.m. yesterday and then stopped at the warehouse where it moved for some time and then stayed still for two more hours before we arrived."

"Lucy must've told Hun that we were on their way." Said Raph "That's how they knew we were coming and they set a trap."

"But I think that they transfered Leo way before we even found out he was missing. Think about it, you have a man on the inside, you go in, you grab Leo, you get out. You have a plan, but something tells you that it could fail. And what do you do? You take his shell cell to mask his location and you take Leo someplace else."

"Mikey you'd do a great investigator." Said Natalie.

"Well, the movies did their job." Mikey chuckled.

"The only thing, though, is I don't think that something told him to change the plan. I think that it was indeed someone that told him what to do. I think someone else has Leo. Someone powerful that pulls the strings." Said Donnie.

"A partner? But why? What did Leo do to make them so angry that they'd do everything to get him?" Asked Raphael.

"I was thinking about that and the only thing that could explain all the chaos is that the kidnapping is directly connected to why Leonardo was shot in the first place."

"Now you lost me." Said Raphael.

"Think about it this way Raph. Leonardo gets out of the lair, goes topside, gets shot and he ends up in the one hospital in NYC that Lucy works in, a man on the inside for Hun and the Purple Dragons. Like they already knew he'd be brought there. They couldn't risk to track him down to the lair, so they needed him out of his comfort zone. Leonardo must've seen something during that night that made them nuts and they started a pre-planned hunt on him."

"I see now where this is going."

"Leonardo said that he does not have recollections of that night, I'm assuming that is because he has retrograde amnesia. I saw a bump on his head when you brought him and that means that he hit his head hard shortly before he was brought in the hospital which caused a concussion, and it wiped some of the memories from that night."

"But if the memories are there why doesn't Leo remember any of them?"

"It takes time to regain the memories that were once lost Donatello. I have just the right way to find out what exactly Leonardo did that night, but I need him to participate. My theory was sadly confirmed with a tiny little detail that I noticed last night in the warehouse."

"What is that?" Asked Raphael.

"Remember the barrel full of fresh water?"

Raphael nodded.

"Well, like Donnie said, the warehouse was abandoned for five years. The smell inside was like no one entered in it for a long time. Yet, we find a water full barrel, fresh water, in a warehouse that no one even knew it existed. What does that tell you?"

"That this thing really stinks."

"They must've used the water for waterboarding. It's an effective way of torture and if they thought that Leonardo saw or even heard something compromising, this whole thing was worth the try and all the effort in getting him alive."

She wasn't far from the truth.

Splinter interrupted their conversation. "Enough talking, let's go to the lair and make a plan. We need to save Leonardo."

Donatello started the engine.

...

As soon as Lucy stepped out of the vehicle two NYPD officers placed cuffs on her hands.

"Melinda Swanson, you are under arrest... Everything that you say can and will be used against you in a court of law. You have right to an attorney..."

...

As they drove to the lair, Natalie replayed all of the events that happened this morning in her head.

...

 _-Earlier that day-_

She was shocked. She was looking at the numbers on the screen and she was shocked. Something that the turtles would call it shell-shocked in their own terms. The rage and anger were evident on her face and it took her a long time before she noticed that Raphael was staring at her.

"Hey Nat something's up?"

"Yes." She almost whispered "Something really bad. And I'm gonna kill her."

"Whoa, whoa, whoa, wait a minute. Who are you going to kill and why?"

"Lucy, my assistant. See this phone number that Donnie couldn't crack the cipher. Well I know that number very well. It belongs to Lucy."

Raphael sank in the couch as did Natalie. She breathed heavily, and her heart was beating so loud that she thought that Raphael could listen it. She wasn't aware that she started crying, she wasn't sure why, but she felt Raph whispering something in her ear before she snuggled in the crook under his chin. Raphael was very gentle with her and she asked herself about misjudging him the first time she saw him. He was a hothead and angry turtle, alright, but he had gentle and caring side that no one knew nothing about since it was always hidden in the shadows. The next thing she remembered was when she woke up from a deep sleep.

For that time Donatello did a research on Lucy Stevenson and she wasn't what she said she was, at all.

...

"What's the time?"

"It's 8 a.m." Donatello answered.

"Come on we have to go."

"Where?"

"I have an idea about how to find out where Leonardo is."

"And what's that idea?"

"I'll explain it to you on the way. Grab Mikey, Raph and Master Splinter. I'll call April and Casey. I need you all on this."

Donatello looked like a huge question mark, but he obeyed and the next moment they were headed to the hospital. April and Casey were already there waiting for them.

Couple of nurses said 'hi' to Natalie as she was quickly walking to the room that Leonardo occupied just yesterday. She entered in the room. She took out a pair of latex gloves on her hands. She carefully searched the room, and she found what she was looking for. A syringe with traces of the tranquilizer that was injected in Leonardo.

"And now lady and gentleman, turtles, and rat, I think I have the last piece of the puzzle that will help us in our search."

She told Donatello to drive to her apartment. She never told them about her address before. She quickly changed in a more comfort clothes and brought a gun with her.

"What is that?"

"It's Glock 9 mil caliber, semi automatic gun Raph. It will help us in our plan. I bought it couple of years ago when... you know what happened."

Raph nodded.

No one said a word.

"So, here is our plan. April you were my patient. You were shot by a stray bullet and you were brought to the hospital on my watch. You've been staying for over a week and just when you were about to be given a clean bill, you were heavily sedated by Lucy, my assistant. You want to press charges, and you want her to be caught. You are a high profile client, and you don't want your name to be dragged through the system. That's why you'll stay anonymous. Casey is your alleged husband. You are only providing them info about a very dangerous woman, that you heard taking about her past, and that her real name was Melinda, and that's why you think that she tried to kill you. And we have the proof." She nodded towards the syringe. "With the data Donnie discovered and that are very helpful, I think that she has no other choice than to collaborate."

"What about the rest of the plan?" Asked Mikey.

"Well, let's just hope that the police will help us. About the outcome, we can just pray it would be what we want it to be."

"This plan is full of risks Ms. Akita. Are you sure you want to do it this way?"

"I have to do it this way Sensei. If she senses that we are on her trail she could easily escape and we lose Leonardo. But, if we catch her unprepared she will sing like a hummingbird."

Natalie was hoping that her plan would work. Otherwise it would be just a waste of time.

...

It wasn't difficult to convince a certain Officer Ramirez to call a detective in the precinct. A very beautiful and strong young man approached them. He was in his late twenties, or early thirties. He was tall, and had blonde hair and blue eyes. Natalie was charmed by his look, but she needed to focus and she snapped back to reality. She told him her plan, and about the attempt of murder. He said that he'll help them with anything. He gave her keys from an unmarked car and his blessings, as Natalie was headed for a dangerous adventure. She was going to lure the wanted criminal and deliver it to the NYPD on a silver tray.

At the same time she'll get all the time she needed before the criminal's arrest to extract information from her. Her self esteem grew up from 0 to 100 in only one day. The determination that she inherited from her father was evident.

"Here goes nothing." She said as she entered in the Malibu and drove away.

...

They arrived at the lair and as soon as they passed the threshold, Donatello went to his lab where his computer was placed. He inserted the address in the search engine and was gathering info about it. The turtles, Splinter and their human friends sat down in the living room trying not to go stir crazy about Leonardo's whereabouts.

From experience his family knew that Leonardo was always the turtle that suffered the most. Both physically and mentally. That's why they were worried of what they will find when they finally get a hold on him. Will he be alive? Will he be the old Leonardo? Who has him? Why?

So many questions, but no answers.

...

Natalie knew how much Donatello pushed himself when he couldn't find anything and she felt sorry she couldn't help him. She still felt guilty for Leonardo's disappearance. She decided to go into the lab.

"Hey Don, I brought you a cup of coffee."

"Thanks Nat."

"Um... Donnie can I ask you something?"

"Sure."

"Can I stay here and try to help ya? I don't know what to do and I can feel Raphael's growing impatience. Pardon me, but I don't want to be his punching bag."

"Okay. You can stay."

"With your determination and your work you look like Garcia you know."

"Like who?"

"There is this new show called Criminal Minds, on CBS. It's its first season. They have Technical Analyst, and her name is Penelope Garcia. You remind me of her."

Donatello smiled at her compliment as he continued to work.

After couple of hours restless work Donatello had something to start with. "So the warehouse that's placed on Forest Avenue on Staten Island is property of a company called "Mr. Grey Inc.", but I can't find any paperwork that will confirm that the company is legit as it says it is. The warehouse is pretty big and we need a plan if we want to knock on their door. We need to make sure the plan is safe before we go on a suicide mission."

Everyone looked like they've seen a ghost when he said "suicide mission". Donatello printed the schematics of the warehouse and started explaining every part of it like he was already there. But, he was the genius working with schematics and probabilities, so for Don this was a routine.

"Is there any connection between this warehouse and the one we went in last night?"

"That's a good question Nat." Donatello typed on the keyboard some more and he could feel Natalie, Raphael and Michelangelo breathing in his neck. Splinter and the others were in the living room.

"No way."

"What's up Donnie?"

"Raph, I think that indeed there is a connection."

"Explain yourself in English, Braniac or else..."

"Raph..." Mikey stopped Raphael, before the hothead used good ol' Donnie as his punching bag.

"The warehouse we went in last night is owned by the same company that owns the warehouse in Staten Island. But the funny part is that the company that allegedly owns both warehouses is run by Travis Jensen."

"And that has something to do with Leo, how exactly?"

"Raph, one of the numbers in Hun's contacts was written under the name of Mr. Grey. I managed to find out that it was a cover for the real owner's name which is by the way Travis Jensen. Hun called Mr. Grey many times last week and guess when one of their deals happened?"

"When?"

"Last Tuesday."

"You are kidding me. The day that Leonardo..."

"Exactly Nat."

"So who is this Jensen character?"

"He is one of the most dangerous man in NYC. And when I say dangerous, I mean dangerous. He is in the arms dealing business since his father died, but he practices his business on the down low. My best guess is that Mr. Grey is the alias he uses so no one knows that's really him under the wraps. No one from his associates lived long enough to tell the story of his real identity. On the other side, the media and the whole NYC know him like the charity donor, an upstanding citizen. All lies."

"What if this is all about the deal that went down in the Tuesday and Leo saw them?" Asked Mikey.

"Then we pray and hope that Leo is alive Mikey. According to this data, Jensen gets off on watching his men while they torture his victims. Let's hope that we are not too late."

"Was there any contact between him and Hun yesterday?" Asked Natalie.

"Yes. An incoming call shortly after Hun kidnapped Leo. I guess that's when they took Leo to Staten Island, and we went straight into a trap."

"I guess that Hun didn't plan this alone."

"I guess not." Said Donatello.

All of them returned to the living room where they proceeded with the plan. No one was able to concentrate on the task in hand after what Donatello told them about Travis Jensen, but they were determined not to give up. They made up a plan and a strategy.

Most of the time Natalie and Donatello were talking and the other were listening. In many ways the doctor reminded them of their missing brother. They were headed in the lion's den, but there was no other way of how to save Leo.

The rest was God's will.

...

After Donatello with the help of Natalie thought of a plan of approach to where they held Leo, the guys were ready for departure. Donnie started the Battle shell and drove through the city.

They caught the first glimpse of the sundown while they passed the busy streets of New York City. Leo was missing for a little more than a day now. They weren't even sure he was alive. But they hoped. Hope was the only thing left for them.

Donnie turned right on 5th Avenue then left to East 64th Street. He continued straight then right on York Avenue, and left to East 63rd Street. He drove straight on Franklin Delano Roosevelt Drive. He passed through the United Nations Tunnel then he got out on Battery Park Underpass. He took a U turn and continued straight through the High L. Carey Tunnel, and then through the Brooklyn Battery Tunnel. He took the I-278 West, i.e. the Gowanus Express Way that took him to Verrazano-Narrows Bridge, their way to the place in Staten Island where Leonardo was held.

Almost 40 minutes after they left the lair they noticed the bridge showing all its glory in the evening. Donatello felt the adrenaline rushing through his veins. He sped up.

...

It took Donatello almost half an hour to pass the bridge, cars coming and going both ways, since there was a road blockade and all vehicles were re-routed. But as soon as they left the traffic behind them, the rest of the way to their target was easy. Verazzano-Narrows Bridge split up, and Donatello drove straight on Narrows Road North that led them to Clove Road. The drive was 10 minutes long. Donatello slowed down and turned left on Forest Avenue.

Almost hour and a half after they left their home they saw it. There like a shadow in the night the warehouse was waiting for their arrival.


	9. To Hell and Back

Chapter 9-To Hell and Back

 _ **I hit a major writer's block with this chapter, but I figured it out and I think it will be like I want it to be.**_

 _ **First a warning: not recommended for persons under the age of 18 because I think that there are some scenes that underage people shouldn't read.**_ _ **And beware of the language.**_

 _ **Second, the scene with Leonardo being buried alive was inspired by Criminal Minds episode "Scared to death" (season 3 episode 3) and NCIS Los Angeles episode "Little Angels**_ _ **"**_ _ **(season 2 episode 5). In the first referenced episode, the UnSub killed his victims by their worst fears. The last victim that was saved by the BAU had a fear of being buried alive. Second referenced episode: the daughter of a NAVY Commander was kidnapped and was buried alive for over 9 hours. The kidnapper(s) put a live feed online where you could see the girl struggling for air. The NCIS eventually found her.**_

 _ **I hope I didn't scare you off too much with the things that will happen next.**_

 _ **-Present day, June 2015-**_

Leonardo drove the same car that Natalie drove on that day when she came to the lair and took him to the hospital. It was one of the many things that were hers that he kept after her death. He stopped the car in front of the graveyard. He pushed a button that told the guard someone was about to enter. He still felt awkward after all that happened to him, but he managed to overcome the panic he had every time he had to go there. It was a way of repaying the debt to Natalie, for all that she did for him.

Leonardo drove inside the gate as the door slowly opened. He came here regularly every Sunday. It was Sunday when Natalie said the last goodbye. So, every Sunday like a clockwork Leo would drive to the cemetery and talk to Natalie. Sometimes even her family would come. They weren't afraid from the four big turtles and rat. They accepted them like Natalie did. Plus Leo enjoyed their time together. He teached the boys the basics of martial arts whenever he had a chance, just like Splinter did the same with him and his brothers. He always talked about their mother to them, so they would never forget that beautiful, caring and passionate for life woman that changed his life and the life of his brothers.

Now 9 years later, he still remembered what he went through in the hands of Travis Jensen. The torture, the rape, the humiliation. He wanted to die in that moment. But, Natalie Akita, the good doctor as he used to call her helped him realize that he was making a huge mistake by wishing his death to come when it wasn't his time. She told him something that Leonardo still remembers. She said _"When you want to die so bad Leonardo think of the people that are sick and are one step close to the death. The only thing they want is to get well and live. Don't you ever forget that_ _._ _"_ After that she hugged him. She was one of those people.

Her unofficial second husband, the detective that helped them with their search for him 9 years ago was seated on the car's backseat along with his little boys. The boys had Natalie's facial features and her hair, but their father's eyes. Natalie told Raph about her disease and her romantic involvement with the detective after they rescued him. She also confessed that she felt like she betrayed Darren and their life together when she started dating the detective, but after two years of solitude and grudge after her family's death she let go of that and allowed herself to enjoy life. She found out that she was pregnant shortly after they all went to Staten Island to get Leo back. Died six months after she gave birth to Leonardo and Raphael. Twins.

As Leonardo walked down the lane that led to Natalie's grave, he remembered that day when his family and friends came to the rescue. He still remembered the pleading words of the full of fear Leonardo that was trapped in that warehouse where unthinkable things were done to him. He was lucky that he survived. But, he wasn't the same. Nothing was the same again. He hated to be touched, he hated the cemetery and he hated closed space. He had the state what others called claustrophobia - fear from closed space (an elevator; room without windows etc.).

He stared at the trees and into the sky. The sun was shining.

"Hey Leonardo what's up?" Asked Thomas.

"I was thinking..."

"About what?"

"About that one time when I was kidnapped by Travis Jensen... And you know the rest."

"You want to talk about it?"

"It's been a long time since I talked about it... I don't know."

"Don't worry Uncle Leonardo we can go to the car if you want some time alone." Said one of the boys.

Leo was surprised at the maturity of the boys.

"Yes, you can do that Raphael. Your Uncle Leo and I have some important thing to discuss."

"Sure thing." Both kids walked away.

"Smart boys. You taught them well Tom." Said Leo.

"Yeah… I guess." Tom sighed, feeling the thoughts of the mutant turtle beside hm. He sighed. "I wish Natalie to have called me earlier." Said Thomas.

"I guess she wasn't sure how'd you take the current situation. We weren't exactly the type of people you were dealing with on daily basis."

"Yeah, but still. I'm sorry you had to go through all that hell Leo."

"Yeah, me too. From time to time I can still feel the earth in my mouth."

"That picture will be saved forever in my mind."

As the boys raced to the car, Leonardo started talking about that time in his life that changed everything afterwards.

...

 _ **2006**_ __

Leonardo felt cold as he was taken in the back of the black SUV. He could hear voices over his head, but wasn't able to open his eyes. The voice was familiar, but didn't belong to his brothers, father or their human friends. He was in a dark place, he could feel that. He felt a hand in his belt and soon his shell cell was snatched from it. Another cell phone chirped and the familiar voice picked up. After couple of minutes of "yes" and "okay" talk he hung up. That's when Leonardo recognized the voice. It was Hun.

...

He was in the building for an hour now and the sedative that Lucy gave him was fading. Leonardo had trouble opening his eyes, but as soon as he did, he saw that it wasn't a dream. He was indeed taken and it was Hun who had him. Leonardo groaned, he felt a stab of pain in his left arm. The stitches were ripped off. Damn. His hands were tied behind his shell. Hun came over him and took him by his throat.

"So, you are awake Freak. It was about time. I'm starting to lose my patience."

Leonardo stared blankly at him.

"And now let's talk business."

"What... business…?"

"You know damn well what."

"No, I don't."

"Oh yes you do, Freak! Last Tuesday, five blocks from Central Park."

"I don't know what are you talking about."

"Listen, just tell me what you saw and we'll make it easy for you."

Leo was stunned. What happened in the Tuesday? Why he couldn't remember? He decided it was better if he kept his mouth shut. Hun looked at the turtle that was seated on the floor. He yanked him on his feet and took him to the barrel full of fresh water.

"Tell me what you saw!"

"I didn't see anything."

"This is your last chance. Don't you lie to me!"

Leo didn't say a word.

"Okay. Your choice."

Hun forced Leo's head underwater. Leo remembered the underwater training he once had with Splinter and tried to hold the air as long as he could. After five minutes Hun pulled his head out of the barrel. Leo took few ragged breaths.

"You wanna talk now Freak?"

No answer.

"Fine!" Hun growled.

He submerged Leo's head in the water again. This time Leo couldn't hold his breath for long and after three minutes he couldn't breathe. He felt how the water entered in his mouth. When Hun took him out he was having trouble breathing and he almost dropped dead on his feet. He tried to inhale through his nose and exhale through his mouth. His lungs burned at the effort and he coughed few times. This time Hun was more than pissed off.

"Just tell me what you know and save yourself Leonardo."

Leo looked him in the eye. Hun took Leonardo in his big hands and this time he put Leonardo in the water with his whole body, not just his head. Leo kicked and tried to free himself, but Hun's strong hands held him down. Big splashes of water covered the moving mountain as Leo tried to get out of the water, but Hun didn't give a damn about it. He forced the turtle further underwater, he kept pushing him when Leonardo stopped moving all of a sudden.

...

Hun was worried because the turtle stopped moving. He pulled him out of the barrel. He wasn't breathing. He checked his pulse, but it wasn't there. He leaned his head on Leonardo's chest, but he couldn't hear his heartbeats. He tried to perform CPR. Shortly afterwards Leonardo started coughing and vomited the water he swallowed. He took small breaths. He shivered uncontrollably. Hun punched him in an attempt to stop him from doing that, but that didn't do anything good. Leo's nose started bleeding and he tasted blood in his mouth. It was like he swallowed a metal object. Hun kicked him once more, this time in the shell. The kicks came like a rain and soon Leo hurt all over his body. He had trouble keeping his eyes open. He let the unconsciousness to come over him. The last thought before he blacked out was of his family.

...

Hun looked at his wrist watch. It was 8:49 p.m. and he was past the deadline to deliver the turtle. He knew that the boss will be mad, since he was all about punctuality, but better late than never. They planned on having Leonardo in the warehouse on 10th Street, but Mr. Grey called and ordered him to transfer the mutant in a warehouse on Staten Island. In between Hun was allowed to play a little with their guest, as he put it and then exactly in 8:30 he was supposed to send the turtle on his way. Hun took the unconscious turtle in his arms and put it in the trunk of the big SUV. He sent few Purple Dragons to accompany him, while he and 15 of his thugs stayed there just in case if the others decided they want their brother back. He had his revenge, but it wasn't enough. He wanted them dead. He wanted Leonardo dead. As he looked at the car leaving, he hadn't the slightest idea that it would be his last day on Earth.

...

Leonardo awoke on his way to Staten Island. At first he didn't realize where he was, but as soon as he saw he was in a trunk, fear overwhelmed him. Just from the thought that he was closed in a tiny space, he felt panic. He tried to take even breaths and think of something else, but it wasn't working.

"Calm down... Calm down..." He kept saying, while trying to think of what happened. Hun kidnapped him after he was knocked out by Natalie's assistant. Then he was brought in that warehouse where Hun water boarded him and tried to extract information from him. Information that Leonardo hadn't known. Or he knew? Then he remembered about something Hun said. Tuesday, five blocks from Central Park. He was supposed to go at April's in the Tuesday and then he came back home. The Tuesday was the day he got shot, but he doubted that had something to do with this. Leo couldn't find the answers to his questions plus he had an enormous headache. He felt like a bus hit him with full force. Leo was one of the strongest living things on Earth, but this time he wasn't. He feared for his life. He feared for the lives of his brothers. What if they were taken too? What will happen to them? He feared that he failed them. He feared that because of his weakness they could die. But, at this point Leonardo wasn't sure in anything or anyone. He didn't even believe in his own shadow.

"It's all my fault." He muttered while he tried to adjust his body in a position that it won't hurt. His mind worked with 1000 thoughts per second. He needed to get out of there as soon as possible. With a bit of prayer and some supernatural strength that came to him at that moment, Leonardo managed to loosen up the rope that tied his wrists. He freed himself and waited in the darkness. It was now or never.

...

The vehicle stopped. Just when the Purple Dragon that drove the car opened the trunk, Leo kicked him with full force. Leo's kick got him in the junk and the man fell on the ground screaming from the pain. Leo was outnumbered, he knew that, but that didn't prevent him from trying to escape. He ran across the yard, but as soon as he came to the entrance of the warehouse he was tackled by one of Mr. Grey's men. He took out a taser out of his pocket and electroshocked Leonardo. The burning pain was more than enough and Leo stopped fighting. This time they used cuffs instead of rope. He was yanked on his feet and he saw a man in a grey suit approaching him. The man looked kinda familiar, but he couldn't remember from where. The look in his green-grey eyes was disturbing. There was something in his demeanor that set off the alarm bells in Leonardo's head.

"Welcome to your private hell, turtle." He said in a hoarse voice.

Leo tried to back up, but the strong hand of Mr. Grey caught him by the throat.

"No one lived long enough to tell tales about me Mr. Leonardo." Said the man "You shouldn't have been where you were last Tuesday. You ruined everything. I think you have a reminder of that night." He squeezed Leo's left arm at the place where the gsw was. Leo gritted his teeth at the searing pain.

So, it was true. The shooting (which he didn't remember) and his kidnapping were connected indeed. Mr. Grey choked Leo long enough. Just when he saw that the turtle was about to black out he let go of his throat. Leonardo welcomed the air that entered in his lungs.

Then Grey's hand trailed off on Leo's body. Leo, who for all that time kept his eyes closed, now snapped them open. He watched with horror, while the man touched him like he owned him. He didn't like what was happening and it took all of his courage and bravery not to scream or beg. The touching stopped and the man in the grey suit ordered his men to take Leo in the building.

...

The warehouse was big and it would take him ages to get out of there, thought Leo as he was brought inside. There were cells and a dining hall, and a bathroom, and an office. Almost like a private prison. Leonardo was taken in a room that wasn't very big. The man that tackled him, uncuffed his hands and put a shackle on each hand. Then he connected a chain to each shackle. The other man shackled his legs to the ground and left the room. The man that stayed pulled the chain hard and Leonardo was abruptly forced to his feet. He was left there, hanging. He couldn't move his body, let alone escape. But, he wouldn't give them the pleasure of watching him fell apart. He would fight, till his last breath.

…

Leo was hanging for couple of hours now, and no one entered in the room where he was left. His body hurt more than before and he fought the unconsciousness. He felt nauseated and slightly dizzy. His breathing was shallow and he didn't know how long could he make it before he was left to die by himself. Then the door opened. Leo managed to lift his head and look at the man that came in. He brought a can full of water and a sponge with him. In the other hand he had cattle prod. Leonardo felt a lump forming in his throat.

"What... are... you... going... to... do... with... that...?" It took a lot of effort for Leo to speak.

"Y tu que crees que voy a hacer?" Leonardo didn't understand what he said. "Let me translate what I said. I said, what do you think I would do?" Said the man with raspy voice and skin that revealed he was Latino, Mexican probably. Long way from home.

"Why... is... what...?" Leo tried to come up with a full sentence.

The man laughed.

"Why is your boss so interested in me? Why does he think that I know something?"

"Because you do know something very important turtle. No me digas que no recuerdas."

"I don't."

"You understand Spanish after all." The man said "Let's see if you can remember with the help of this."

Suddenly, the man took the can with the water and poured the whole amount of water on the helpless turtle. Leo squirmed and tried to free himself, but without success. The Mexican strapped the sponge in front of the cattle prod and put it on Leo's chest. He activated the cattle prod and the first electroshock coursed through Leonardo's body. He bit his lower lip. The pain was overwhelming. The Mexican stopped and took Leo's face in his hand.

"Tell me what you saw and I can stop this now."

"How many times do I have to tell you that I don't know what are you talking about?!"

The Mexican looked in the eyes of Leonardo. It looked like the turtle was telling the truth, but he was there that night and was certain that the turtle saw what they did. He heard their names, knew their plans with the weapons, possibly even the date when the new shipment was supposed to arrive and they couldn't risk him or his brothers preventing their business deals. He continued with the electro shocks until he sensed a presence.

"Rojas, an update." The big boss entered in the room.

"He says that he hadn't heard or seen anything Mr. Grey." Said the Mexican.

"Keep going." Grey sat on a chair in the corner of the room watching his prey as he struggled.

Just as Rojas sent another wave of electroshocks Leonardo screamed. He couldn't stand the pain anymore. It was a painful and piercing scream. His whole body was burning and it hurt to just breathe. An evil smile crossed Mr. Grey when he heard the scream that escaped from Leo's mouth. He was always looking forward to his victims screaming and begging. The screams were music for his ears. Oh, what he did to them...

Leo felt something hot and slick run through his mouth and onto his neck. His nose was bleeding. Again. Rojas sent another wave of electroshocks when he heard his boss.

"Stop. It's enough for now. I need him alive to tell me what he knows."

Rojas listened to Mr. Grey. He knew that his boss was right. If he electroshocked him once more, the turtle could've died. Mr. Grey always knew when to draw the line. Rojas took the empty can and the cattle prod with him and left the room after his boss. Leonardo sank into the welcoming blackness.

...

 _ **Later**_

"Remind me why are we doing this Rojas?"

"The boss was clear, he said we transfer the turtle in the other room and leave him there."

"Unchained?"

"Pardon me Jonas, but I think that he can't go anywhere in this condition. He will be locked up, plus this warehouse has maximum security. No one can get in and out without being caught by the silent alarms." Rojas smiled.

"Okay."

Jonas listened to Rojas and both of them took Leonardo to other room that was much bigger. They left Leo lying on the floor. They closed the door and locked twice. Then Rojas put padlocks on three places. Their guest was secured.

...

Leo woke up and found himself on the cold floor. He shivered and he felt waves of cold and warm coursing through his body. "Fever." He murmured as he tried to lift himself from the floor. But, the only thing he managed to do was to fall back to the floor. "Oooompf." He said as he made a loud thump on the floor. "Why are you doing this to me?!" He screamed, but no one answered him. That's when he realized that this room had sound isolation. Leo sank furthermore on the floor.

...

It was like someone was watching him, because at that moment he heard the bolt turning twice and a man entered in the room.

"Here eat!" One of the men said, as he brought food to Leo.

Leo hadn't wanted to eat, the look of the bowl made him feel nauseated. He heard the door being locked again. His stomach had hurt from all the beatings, the hunger and the electroshocks. Every part of his body hurt. He tried to even his breathing, but it hurt every time he tried to control it. He felt a sharp pain in his chest every now and then. He was afraid of what the electroshocks would do to his body. He put his hand on his plastron on the place where his heart was. His heart beats were as irregular as much as his breathing was ragged.

After few minutes he looked at the food again. He hadn't eaten since breakfast and his stomach growled at the thought of food. He took the bowl and took a spoonfull from whatever was inside. But then it clicked to him. What if the food was poisoned? What if they wanted to kill him this way? Leonardo was determined to escape, and if that meant to stay hungry for the time being, then so be it. He couldn't let them get what they want and then celebrate their success of breaking his spirit. He didn't know how much time he was there. And he didn't know how much time he will stay.

He adjusted himself on the wall and tried to meditate. It always helped, but now it was very painful to meditate in lotus position. Instead he just tried to relax, to clear his head from all the thoughts he had, and take deep breaths (which was difficult considering his current state).

...

He lay on the ground stretching his body that was hurt too much and he let the darkness take him. It wasn't long before the guards came for him now that he was awake. He was glad that at least he could meditate a little. He was forced to his feet. He could barely walk, the dizziness in his head still present. If it wasn't for the two guards that held him on either side he was going to hit the floor. He was brought to the torture room again. This time there wasn't any electroshocks, but what Mr. Grey had planned for him was equally scary.

"Welcome back Mr. Leonardo. Slept well?"

Leo tried to contain his anger, but the treatment he got and the tone of the voice of his captor made him feel like he never felt before.

"What the fuck is going on?" He almost sounded like Raph when he said that. He figured out that Raph would take this fairly well. His brother cursing. Priceless.

"Watch your mouth turtle!"

"What's wrong with you all? You are all asking fucking questions that I don't know the fucking answer to."

"If that's what you say..."

"I'm saying that I don't know what fucking thing happened last Tuesday, and I don't know what is it you fucking monsters want me to tell you!"

Suddenly a woman appeared out of the blue. "I see you caught him honey."

"Everything for you, my love." The man in the grey suit kissed the woman in the red velvet dress. "It was him that scared you right?"

"Yes. That monster was watching me, no, he was staring at me while you were doing your job with the big guy."

"Don't worry my darling, I'll teach him a lesson."

With that Mr. Grey ordered to his men to tie Leonardo to the post that was installed special for him. Leonardo fought, but he was subdued and was tied up to the post. He felt his anger bubble up at what just happened. _"Why don't I remember what happened last Tuesday?"_ he asked himself.

Mr. Grey and the woman entered in the room. Mr. Grey gave a sign to the man that brought a large hose with him. Leo's eyes opened even more when he realized what they were goingg to do. At that, the man holding the hose released the vent and cold water covered Leonardo. He tried to breathe, but he couldn't. He screamed from the cold water that penetrated deep in his body and in his bones. This whole situation reminded him of the numerous times when Mikey showered and left only cold water. One time Leo was really pissed off, but seeing the happy face of his brother made him retreat and let the matter drop just with a single warning for the next time. Smile floated on his lips at that memory, and that made Mr. Grey to say "Stop."

Travis Jensen got up from where he was seated and took Leonardo's head in his hands. "What's so funny Mr. Turtle?"

"Nothing." Leo answered.

"People don't smile just because Leonardo." Spit Jensen.

"Oh yes, they do."

Jensen screamed "Aaaargh!" before he kicked Leonardo viciously in the lower abdomen. "This is making me angry Leonardo. All your attitude and talking. I'm at the end of my patience!"

"Fuck your patience! And fuck you!" Here, he said it. Oh, Raph would so enjoy my language, thought Leonardo, the smile still on his face.

"Is that so?"

"Yes."

Jensen took out a pocket knife. Just when Leonardo thought that he was going to end his life, Jensen cut the rope that held Leo in place and took him by the right arm. Leo struggled in his captor's grip, but that only made Jensen angrier. He threw him on the floor and kicked him in the legs. The blinding pain in his legs made Leo to stay where he was, barely breathing.

"I've never seen something that stubborn in my whole life. You just don't understand when it's time to stop fighting me isn't it Leonardo?" Jensen asked with a troubled voice.

The face of Leonardo was unreadable mask, but his eyes were what betrayed his fear. From the corner where he was seated he could see the woman in the red dress watching the show her husband or lover directed, but she didn't do a thing to stop him from doing it. She was equally frightening.

"You think I'm stupid? You think I don't know that you were the one that ruined my deal with Hun and the Purple Dragons? You think I don't know you are the one that scared my wife? You think that I don't know you found out about my true identity and was going to tell the police? I know you know about the deal that was about to happen these days. I'm not naive Leonardo. So stop pretending like you don't know anything about this 'cause I know you do. I thought that you had honor. Your Bushido training was for nothing."

"Don't mention the Bushido Code you sick son of a bitch. If you knew something about honor, which you clearly don't, then you would have known that a true warrior, a true ninja never attacks his opponent just to defeat him and brag about it. He fights till the end, until only one man is standing. He fights for his honor only and only if he has to. And a warrior that goes by the Bushido Code never ever attacks a warrior that has been wounded in a fight. So don't talk about Bushido 'cause you don't know a shit about it and do me a favor and shut the fuck up!"

"You think I will listen to you you little dumbshit? All you do since I first met you is causing me problems. You were staring at my wife and almost blew up my cover. And you will pay for everything you did and you didn't do, but planned on doing."

"What the hell are you talking about?"

"You wanted to fuck my wife didn't you?"

"You are definitely out of your mind!" Leo screamed.

"Hun told me about you and your family. You are one of a kind, and you can't fuck your brothers so you were trying to take my wife from me. You lived a life of a loner for a long time. You wanted something on the side, didn't you? Admit it!"

"If I was interested in doing what you say I did, I wouldn't do it with your wife, asshole."

That earned him a punch in the right cheek. The heat of the hit was paralyzing. Leonardo was shaking violently and couldn't stop. He felt Jensen's hands on his shoulders. He yanked him on his feet and ordered the man to chain him like they did to him the first time he was brought in this room.

"Now, you'll pay for your sins." Jensen said in low voice.

As soon as Leonardo was chained and on his feet, Jensen ordered the men to shackle each leg separately. With that Leonardo's legs were wide spread and one soft spot on his body was left vulnerable. Leo felt shivers up his spine when he caught up with the plans of his captor. It didn't take him long to understand what Jensen planned on doing with him. He should've seen this coming. The way Jensen moved his hands possessively over his body when he first met him said it all, but Leonardo misunderstood the meaning of the silent signs. The man with green-grey eyes was a pervert that got off on torturing his victims. He could feel him touching him all over his body. It was making him feel sick. He closed his eyes and tried to think of happier times, but with the constant touching and murmurs of pleasure that came from Jensen's mouth he wasn't able to concentrate.

"I never tried to make out with someone other than people before. I guess this will be my first. Screw you would be the ultimate high my friend."

"I'm not your friend!"

"You will be, after this. No one have ever lived long enough to tell these kind of tales Mr. Leonardo. No one. And you time will come. But, first, we have to party a little, what do you think?"

Leonardo's blood froze when he heard that. He opened his eyes and looked into the eyes of his captor. He pleaded silently with his eyes. And Hamato Leonardo never pleaded. "Don't!" Leonardo yelled, but it was too late. Jensen placed his hand in between Leo's legs. Everything after that was a blur, 'cause Jensen squeezed him so hard that Leo screamed like a wounded animal left to die in the forest, and he lost his senses about time and space. He was panting by the time Jensen adjusted himself and penetrated inside his captive so hard that at the end when he reached his climax, the turtle was already unconscious.

"I'll be back." He whispered so only Leonardo could hear it. He left him there, blood running down his legs, half dead. For the whole time, his wife watched the act of rape. Jensen came to her side and kissed her deeply. "My first sex with an animal that talks and fights like hell. Not bad. Not bad at all." He murmured. He took his wife by the hand and they left the room.

After that he enjoyed the overheated body of his young wife.

...

It was almost noon when Leonardo awoke. He lost a lot of blood and that made the things even harder. He could hardly focus his sight and he felt pain whenever he tried to move. His whole body hurt. He lifted his head, but he regretted the move. His head was spinning like a Ferris wheel. He lowered his head and put it between his knees. He took even breaths and tried to calm his heart beats. And then the events from few hours before came back to him like a boomerang. Leonardo's cries of anguish could be heard only inside in his room because of the sound isolation. He cried himself out. Then he decided that he would fight till the end, but he won't let that man touch him once more.

He forced himself on his feet. He wasn't ready yet, but he needed to move and not stay at one place. He paced up and down the room. It was a large room and that gave him enough space to exercise. He knew that if Master Splinter was there he would chastise him for not letting his body heal, but as always Leo would dismiss the words full of worry. "I miss you Sensei." He said "I miss everyone of you." Suddenly he felt a stabbing pain in between his legs like someone kicked him in the junk. He fell on the floor screaming from pain. He let the pain subside. Everything was so painful, but this time Leonardo decided that the pain won't stop him. He lay on the floor, waiting for the guards to come and take him, but no one came.

He already made a plan in his head of how he would escape. His captor wasn't as careful as he thought he was, and this time he hadn't tied him up like he did the previous times. That gave Leonardo the advantage he needed. Maybe Leonardo hadn't much physical strength left, but he had the strength of his mind and spirit. He just expected it to be enough so he could beat the bastard. He got up again and paced up and down the room. "To shell with the pain! And to shell with gunshots!" He screamed.

...

Travis Jensen watched the live feed from the room the turtle was in and he could tell that his captive was planning something. He was on his feet, but you could see that the painful movements took its toll on Leonardo. At one moment he fell on the floor, but as quickly as he fell, he got up and continued walking. What was he trying to do, Jensen asked himself when someone triggered the silent alarms in the yard.

...

It's been a few hours since Leonardo woke up when he heard a noise. He heard the sounds of a fight going on outside. He tried to look through the window, but it was placed too high. Could it be his brothers? Was his stay at that awful place over? Just when he thought everything will be fine, five men entered in his room. They approached him and tried to put cuffs on his wrists. But, Leonardo surprised them.

He swung his right arm at the first guard and knocked him out immediately. He jumped on top of the second guard with a vicious kick on the back, took the third guard by the collar and pushed him into the wall. The fourth guard tried to stop him with the taser, but Leonardo ducked and managed to take the taser and put the fourth guard down with it. The fifth guard looked like he had some skills. He kicked Leo in the side, but Leo didn't even let out a sound nor he fell. The man charged him again this time he aimed on Leonardo's shell, as he was facing the floor. Leo turned around in the split of the second and he took the man by the leg and dragged him, then he hit him with full force on the face. He made sure that everyone was out before he searched them for weapons. He hadn't had his Katana swords with him and that irritated him. But, the goal justifies the means, and if that meant that he had to use a gun or taser, so be it.

He got out of the room in a search for exit. What he encountered was Jensen with an army behind him.

"You thought that I would let you escape so easily?"

"Nope. But, I had to try." Leo smiled.

Jensen hit him square on the chest.

"Ooompfff!" Leo said and fell on the floor.

…

Donatello killed the lights and parked the Battle shell on the back of the warehouse. He stayed in the vehicle observing the surroundings. It looked like there were no guards in the back yard. Strange. Raphael got out and searched the perimeter.

"4 people on the front, but I don't know how many are inside."

"So, how are we gonna do it?" Asked Donnie.

"We'll do it this way. Casey you and Mikey go on the back, me and Raph on the front. And you Master Splinter take Donnie and cover our backs."

Natalie took the gun she used just few hours before to intimidate Lucy and Leo's spare Katanas. She somehow knew that these guys won't fight honorably and she needed all weapons available.

"This is the first time someone pairs me with you Mike." Said Casey.

"Natalie is almost like Leo. If she says I should go with you, I'll go with you."

"I don't have nothing against that. It's just, weird you know."

"Well, everything is weird."

"Shhh. Quiet guys." Said Natalie. After a brief pause she said "We are ready guys, let's roll."

Everyone took their place. They approached the warehouse. Donnie brought a chain cutter and he used it on the front door. They were officially in.

...

One of the guards heard the noise and came close to the gate. He double checked the surroundings. Nothing. Just when he turned around an invisible hand took him by the neck and pulled him in the darkness.

"One down." Said Natalie as she made sure the man won't move.

Casey and Mike took out two more, while Donnie took out the fourth guard. Their entrance was clean now. But they triggered the silent alarm.

...

Jensen now heard the noise that came from the outside. His guards were down. He called all of his men that were there that night and started giving orders.

"Make sure the turtle is safe here."

Few men listened to his order and went to the room where they kept Leonardo. The rest of the men went with Jensen.

...

Raphael put his hand on his chest.

"What's wrong Raph?"

"I don't know. Probably from the stress."

Natalie wasn't convinced in that, but she continued with the plan indeed. "Yeah. Let's go."

They entered in the warehouse. What they saw froze them in place. Leo was held by one of Jensen's men while Jensen trained his gun at Leo's head.

"Hey Jensen!" Natalie screamed.

Jensen turned around to see where the voice came from. "Who are you?"

"Just a nice lady that will shove your balls up your mouth."

"Wow, you have some vocabulary."

"The street is a subject that they don't teach you in school Travis. Now let the turtle go and we can talk."

"I won't let him go."

"You don't stand a chance Jensen. Now let Leonardo go and we can finish this off right here and right now."

Leonardo, Jensen's men, the turtles, Splinter and Casey looked in awe as Natalie approached to Jensen.

"You know what she did to Hun dude?" Mikey asked "She helped him get on the other side. If you don't want to experience the same you better let our brother go."

Natalie smiled. _Mikey, you one goofy turtle._

"You are crazier than I thought."

"We are all crazy. Some more than the others." Said Raphael.

"What makes you think I won't shoot Leonardo right here?"

"I know for sure that you won't." Natalie managed to free Leonardo from the hold that two men had on him with a swipe of the Katana blades. She then stood in front of him in order to protect him from Jensen.

Jensen as he saw what was happening retreated with few of his men. The other men stayed and fought the turtles, Splinter and Casey.

"Now this is a party!" Casey screamed as he bashed a baseball bat in one of the men. Leo slumped on the floor completely exhausted from the beating he just endured. Natalie checked his vitals. Although his breathing was ragged and his pupils were dilated, Leonardo was alive and that was all that mattered now.

...

Donatello twirled his Bo at the nearest man and sent him flying to the other end of the warehouse. Mikey trained his 'chucks at the wrists of one of the guards and kicked them with his legs straight in the chest. Then he continued with the next man that came to him. Raph stabbed one of the men with his sai. This screamed from the pain. "That was for my brother you idiot." He said. Splinter used his walking stick as a weapon and managed to beat up few thugs when suddenly one of the men pulled out a gun and aimed at Master Splinter. Natalie was fighting too in order to protect Leonardo. She managed to defeat the last of the men that threatened her when she saw the one that pulled the gun.

"Stay here Leonardo." She said. Leo smiled in response.

She reacted on instinct. She dropped the Katana. She took out the gun from behind where she put it. She aimed at the man and fired. The gunshot echoed in the warehouse. The man with the gun fell on the floor. The turtles and Casey looked at Natalie that had that deadly look again.

"Making the mistake once is okay. But making the same mistake twice is a choice." Said Natalie as she placed the gun under her shirt.

"Thank you Ms. Akita. You saved my life."

"You are welcome Master Splinter. I'm sure you would've done the same thing for me."

"Hey where is Leo?" Asked Raph when he realized that his older brother wasn't there with them.

"He is here." Said Jensen.

…

The horror on Raph's face couldn't be described with words. He feared for his brother the whole time and the fact that the psycho that had him for over a day, had a hold on his brother again, hadn't helped to calm his temper. He twirled his sai and was ready to attack when he heard Leo's hoarse voice.

"Raph don't."

"But, Leo, he..."

"Please..."

Raphael was worried as shell. His older brother never pleaded. His looked horrified.

"What he'd do to you?" No response "Leo?"

Leo lowered his gaze ashamed of his brother. He fought the tears, but he couldn't. Raph looked at Leo, helpless in the hands of Jensen.

"What did you do to him?"

"None of your damn business!" Jensen growled "But I can tell you that your brother enjoyed everything that happened to him."

"You sick son of a bitch, when I lay my hands on you… Fuck you Jensen! Let go of my brother."

"Now that would be a shame. He has a potential you know. And you speak the same language."

"What do you mean?"

"Foul language. You curse a lot."

"Leo?" Raphael silently asked his brother and got a weak smile in return. _That's my brother_ _,_ thought Raph.

Jensen raised a knife on Leo's throat.

"Put the knife down Jensen!" Said Natalie as she trained the gun on him "Put it down or I'll shoot you myself."

"Go ahead do it." Said Raphael

"And risk to blow your brother's head? I don't think so. I make you a deal. You put your gun down and let us go."

"Never!" Natalie replied.

"Your choice then."

"Boss we are ready." Said Rojas.

Right after that Jensen took out a hand grenade and threw it at the rescue team. In the split of the second Natalie yelled "Down!" All of them went down when the grenade exploded.

Natalie and Raph were the first that got up and running through the front door. The car left the warehouse.

"Oh shell. Leo!" Raph said.

Natalie took out her cell phone and dialed a number.

"What are you doing Nat?"

"Calling for reinforcements."

Raphael hadn't said a thing, but he went to check on his brothers, Master Splinter and Casey.

"You okay?"

"My ears are buzzing but I'll be fine." Said Donatello.

"I'm okay my son. What happened?"

"They took Leo and left with a car."

"That was one shell of a psycho." Said Mikey.

"Yeah I know bro. Case you okay?"

"Yep, I'll live. Now let's get outta here and bust Jensen's ass for taking Leo from us."

"I agree."

"Where is Ms. Akita Raphael?"

"She is talking on the phone."

"With who?"

"She didn't say. She just said that she was calling for reinforcements."

"And I did. Detective Hayden. We better get going if we want to stop Jensen before he disappears completely. The car went that way."

Donatello drove the Battle shell, while Natalie sat on the passenger's seat. The others were in the back. Natalie's cell rang.

"Yeah?"

"The plates you asked me to run through the system... The car belongs to Travis Jensen. Natalie what's going on?"

"I will tell you everything when it's time. Can you hack through the GPS unit in the car?"

"I have to talk with our tech, but I think it could be."

"When?"

"I don't know. He is probably at home now, it's almost 7:30 p.m. and he's been working straight two days without rest. I have to call him and ask him to get back to work."

"Shit." Natalie turned and faced Donatello. "Listen Tom, we don't have much time. I have a plan hot to hack into the GPS. I'll give you an address and you have to meet me there. Do not ask any questions. Are you with me?"

"Of course I am Natalie. I bet the thing is super serious huh? You never get this agitated for nothing."

"Yes it has to do with the patient with the complaint. Only the problem is, my redhead friend wasn't the patient that got almost killed."

...

"What is she doing?" Asked Raphael from the Battle shell.

"Trusting her instincts my son." Said Splinter.

...

"What are you talking about Natalie?"

"My patient was kidnapped and he is in that fucking car and we need to find him before Jensen kills him and we lose him forever! Do you understand?"

"Yes I do. Where do we meet?"

"Central Park, half an hour. Send me all the information you've got on Jensen and his car, specifically the data about the GPS. And Thomas?"

"Yes?"

"Be careful."

"Who were you talking to Nat?" Mikey asked.

"He is the detective from this morning. The one that helped us with the arrest."

"And you think that he will keep our secret?"

"Yes. He is a man of the law, and he is trustworthy. I believe that he'll help us. He wants Jensen out of the picture as much as we do."

"Why?"

"Jensen killed his sister. Tortured her, raped her and killed her."

"Shell. Jensen leaves bloody trail wherever he goes."

"Yes he does Raph. And we need to stop him. I don't care if we have to kill him, but we need to stop his reign or else many more people will suffer." Natalie paused for a minute, gathering her thoughts. "Casey call April and tell her to meet us at Central Park in 30."

"On it."

"Don pull over."

"Why?"

"Just pull over."

Donatello stopped the Battle shell. "Raph, you drive. Don I need you to hack in the GPS system that's inside of Jensen's car. We find the car, we find Leonardo."

"I'll try."

Natalie felt tired and slight dizzy, but now wasn't the time for showing weakness. Now was the time to save her friend.

...

"Where are you taking me?"

"Oh, you'll love it Leonardo. Just wait."

Soon after they departed they switched cars. They left the one they were driving close to the warehouse on the 10th and they continued with the other car to their final destination.

Jensen had pre-planned everything, but he never thought that tonight would be the night when he gets to fulfill his plan. After a good half an hour driving through town and another half an hour in the outskirts of New York they arrived at their destination. Jensen's private graveyard in one of the many forests in NYC. A big hole in the ground was dug a couple of days ago. After Rojas killed the lights of the car, he helped Jensen to take Leonardo out of the car. The turtle was badly hurt, but he still tried to free himself.

"Well you can't escape this now." Said Rojas as he dragged Leonardo.

"This is your final destination Leonardo." Said Jensen with an evil smile.

"What have you planned for me now prick?"

"Your burial."

Rojas then threw Leonardo in the hole in the ground as Jensen took out a shovel and started filling the makeshift grave with earth.

Leonardo panicked. His hands and legs were tied tightly and he couldn't move. The earth was filling his nose and mouth and soon he couldn't breathe..

"Please... Don't do that..."

"I'm not listening!"

Jensen continued to throw earth in the hole. Soon Leo couldn't be seen on the surface anymore.

"Leave him now. And let's get going." Said Jensen He and Rojas left the fresh grave with the victim inside.

...

Raphael stopped the vehicle just in front of detective Thomas Hayden and April. All of them got out of the Battle shell.

"Now, it will be the right time to explain everything to me Natalie and who are your friends here."

Natalie explained everything to Thomas to the last detail. How they went and almost had Leonardo, but he was taken again. And how it was important for Leonardo to be found.

"That fucking bastard!"

"Calm down Tom."

"That man tortured my sister, raped her and buried her alive. And you want me to calm down? Every minute he has Leonardo in his hands..."

Everybody looked at him with eyes wide open in horror. The silence was painful.

"Guys, I've hacked into the GPS. According to the coordinates the car isn't moving and currently the location where the car is, is two blocks east of the 10th Street." Said Donnie.

"Wasn't that warehouse located on the 10th?"

"Yes."

"Why Jensen would go there?"

"I don't know. But, either way we have to go and see if he is really there."

All of them entered in the Battle shell and headed to the 10th street. It was close to 10 p.m. and the time was running out for Leonardo.

...

"Why are you smiling Rojas?"

"The turtles will be surprised when they find the car and we are not there."

"There is something more. I can feel it now."

"I installed a bomb in the car. Under the driver's seat."

"That will teach them a lesson. Buen trabajo Rojas."

"Gracias Jefe."

"Is there something more you want to tell me?"

"No."

"Good."

...

Donatello parked the car few blocks from where the car was. Don, Natalie, Thomas and Raphael went to check the area while the others stayed in the Battle shell. Donatello spotted the black sedan that Jensen and Rojas escaped with. It was empty. His heart ached in despair.

"They must have switched cars." He said "I'm gonna check the GPS unit either way."

Donatello opened the car door and sat on the driver's seat. He punched the screen few times before he noticed something that was out of the ordinary.

"I've got you."

"What's up Donnie?" Asked Raph.

"I think I may now where is Leo."

"Where?"

"Let me explain the process of discovery will ya?"

"Yes please."

"Listen, Jensen is a pro. Why would he leave an address on the GPS?"

"That's right. He would have deleted it." Said Thomas.

"Yes, I bet he does that all the time. But what if Rojas, the guy that helped Jensen, was sent somewhere and he didn't know the place and activated the GPS, but forgot to delete the GPS data and the address stayed memorized."

"I see where this is going."

"And whoever took this car visited the place a lot this past week. To be exact the first time it was visited was last Wednesday night."

"You gotta be kidding me." Said Natalie.

"Correct me if I'm wrong, but from what I understood last Tuesday night was the night that Leonardo was shot. Wednesday was the day he was brought to the hospital." Thomas said Natalie nodded.

"So this means that Jensen planned this since the very first moment?" Asked Raphael.

"It looks like he did." Said Don.

"Donatello tell us the address."

When Donatello repeated what he read on the GPS it took Thomas a lot of effort not to fall down.

"Thomas are you alright?" Natalie asked.

"Yes, but we need to get to that place now. It's of an essence to get there before..."

"Before what detective?" Raphael growled.

"Before Leonardo dies from suffocation. That same place is where that bastard, where Jensen buried my sister alive and left her to die. Couple of stray tourists found a hand dangling from the makeshift grave in the middle of the forest and reported the case when they were found. The police, including me went to see the crime scene. We came to the place just when the coroner took the body out of the ground. It didn't take me long to recognize the engagement ring on my sister's hand. I told the police officers that the body belonged to my sister. But, they needed an official confirmation. I went down town to the Coroner's office and confirmed what I said earlier. After my boss told me how she died and what happened to her before, he pulled me out of the investigation."

"I'm sorry man." Said Raph "And I agree with you. Let's get going."

Natalie looked as Donatello put his left leg on the ground and it was about to get up when she shrieked "Donnie stay put!"

Raph, Don and Tom looked at her waiting for an explanation.

"There is a bomb under the seat. Unless you want to be blown up to turtle pieces don't get up."

"Okay." He gulped.

Donatello was very scared. Not only he couldn't move, but he wasn't supposed to do anything that will trigger the explosion. With other words he was supposed to sit still in a position, until they did something to prevent the bomb from exploding.

"This day just keeps getting better." Muttered Raph. "Leo is out there, kidnapped by a sociopath, Donnie is sitting on a bomb. And I'm tired of being pulled around the city."

"Raph calm down. We need to focus now. If we want to save Donnie we need to focus."

"Yeah, right. You sound just like Master Splinter."

"She is right my son. You need to focus and not let the anger to consume you. You saw what the anger and the grudge did to me. Do not let your heart to be ruled by anger. Calm down."

"We'll figure this out Raph." Natalie gave him a shoulder squeeze. "I need to look up closely to the bomb." She hissed when she bent over, but she wouldn't let the others now. It wasn't time for showing pain.

"What do you see Nat?" Asked Don.

"I see wires that are connected to a mechanism. There is a timer that says we have less than three minutes to try to deactivate the bomb, or we are all dead."

"Let's try with the wires first."

"Yup." Natalie said as she proceeded.

There were numerous wires: red, blue, yellow, white, black and green. It was a tough decision, but Natalie needed to chose which one to cut.

"Cut the yellow one." said Donatello.

"I should cut the blue one. Aside that is my favorite color, but I think the blue wire is the one."

"Or maybe you should cut the red one." Said Raph.

"Guys you are not making it easier on her." Said Thomas.

"I have a better idea how to stop this bomb. If I make one wrong move I can make the bomb go off any second. I need a bobby pin."

"Where the shell you will find one?" Asked Raph.

"Ms. O'Neill." Said Splinter.

"Yes, Master Splinter is right April has bobby pin in her hair. Go Raph and tell her to give you one bobby pin."

"On it."

Natalie looked at the timer 1:59. "God help us." She said.

Half a minute later, Raph was back. Natalie took the bobby pin and straightened it. She finally managed to place the bobby pin between the seat and the pressure point.

"Okay, guys I need you to go in the Battle shell. All of you."

"What about you Nat?"

"I'll stay with Donatello."

"If you stay I'll stay." Said Raph.

"Me too." Said Splinter.

"Me three." Said Thomas.

"It's pointless to convince you guys, but please listen to me."

Reluctantly all of them left one by one with heavy steps.

"It's now or never Donnie."

"I'm scared Natalie."

"I know Don, I'm scared too. Listen, when we'll do it on three. When I say three you get up and run as fast as you can. Okay?" Donnie nodded. Natalie hugged him and then took him by the hand. "One..." Pause. "Two..." Pause. "Three! Run Donnie!"

Donatello got up and together with Natalie sprinted as they left the car behind them. Few moments later the car exploded.

...

"That was close." Commented Donnie on their way back to the Battle shell.

"And I proclaim myself as a part of a non-existing bomb squad." Natalie said.

"You sure as shell watch a lot of movies." Chimed in Raph.

"Guilty as charged."

"NYPD could use your expertise young lady." Said Thomas. Natalie smiled and as she continued to walk she sensed an elbow in her left arm. Raph.

"Hey Nat, you up to something with this guy?"

"What are you saying?"

"You seem a little bit drawn to him. In a different kind of way. Like you love him."

"Since when are you an expert in that field Hamato Raphael?"

"I've been watching Casey look at April the way you two look each other. You don't have to be a pro to see that they are in love. And so are you."

"I prefer to discuss this matter with you after this is over."

"So there is something?"

"No comment."

Raph laughed while he accompanied Natalie to the vehicle. Donatello and Thomas exchanged looks. Thomas asked him with silent signs "What's going on?" Donatello shrugged his shoulders implying that he didn't know.

As soon as they reached the vehicle, Donatello started the engine. The address wasn't far from here, but they were already two and a half hours behind Jensen. "Hang on Leo." Donnie said to himself as he drove through the streets of New York City that were full of traffic activity. The day was very warm, hot even and now the temperature showed almost 105. It was the longest night in their lives.

...

At the other end of the city Juan Rojas drove the black Cadillac Escalade through the dark streets of NY. He and his boss were ready to leave New York and go to Mexico, and from there in South America where Jensen could continue with his business of illegal arms dealing. His position here was compromised and they couldn't risk all of their work to be thrown in the ocean if the police knocked on their door. Rojas was thinking of the day he joined his boss.

Jensen was in a routine visit in Mexico when Rojas was almost killed. Jensen saved his life and managed to transport him through the bridge that connected Chiuaua State, Mexico and El Paso, Texas. Since then Rojas became the second in command to Jensen. He witnessed the things Jensen did to his victims. Almost ten years he served to the man that changed the lives of people that he hardly even knew. All of that just to fulfill his needs to watch them struggle, to torture them and then kill them slow and with maximum pain.

Almost all of his victims died buried alive and in 99% of the cases Jensen raped his victims, men, women and recently the list included a mutated turtle.

Sometimes Rojas asked himself why he did that? Why he stayed with the man that was so vicious? Why Jensen used him for his pervert games? And how could possibly be someone that would love an animal like he was? Jensen's wife was also a witness to some of his performances and she wasn't a little bit disturbed by what she was seeing. Her husband, her love, torturing people for pleasure. The answer of all questions, Rojas believed, it was in the promise he gave to that man. The day Jensen saved his life he promised to his new Master, to his Boss that he will protect him with his life if needed. And he always did that.

But, the piece of conscience that was left in Juan Rojas told him that Jensen crossed the line last night when they brought the turtle in the warehouse in Staten Island. Since he tackled the turtle on his way to the entrance he felt something, an aura that hung around the blue clad turtle that was screaming innocence. That innocence and the turtle's honor were taken in that cell in that damn warehouse. And Rojas couldn't do a thing to stop him. If he faced his boss, if he just said a word about what he thought then he would've been dead by now. He kept his mouth shut and an innocent being was scarred for life because of that.

There was this philosophy that was known for the people that worked for Travis Jensen aka the Grey Man. No one lives long enough to tell his true identity. And your opinion matters to the boss only when it's connected to the business in hand and when he thinks that your knowledge and opinion will do some good. The rest of the time your opinion didn't matter. You weren't even allowed to think different from Jensen. Rojas, with the years learned the price one must pay in order to save his opinion for himself.

He was witness of how the Shredder, aka Oroku Saki killed a man that wanted to get out of the business and that told his opinion to Jensen. Straight into his face. A day after he signed his death sentence, the Shredder, together with his Foot Clan and Elite Ninjas attacked the man. His name was Darren Williamson. And there was a collateral damage. His daughter was killed in the attack and his wife was wounded, but alive. She was a trauma surgeon in one of the hospitals in NYC and she hadn't the slightest idea that the man that ordered her husband's murder was the one that hurt her new friend.

Destiny's twisted game, karma, universal conspiracy, whatever you like to call it, that same woman appeared in the life of Travis Jensen twice. Once when her family was killed, and the second time, this night. But, he hadn't the slightest idea who she was. And that weapon in the hands of Rojas was very powerful. He understood that the chance to redeem himself for what he's done had finally come. He decided that it was time for him to pay for his sins, even if that meant his death. He couldn't watch anymore how Jensen sacrificed people for bizarre reasons. For God's sake he killed people that looked at him from the wrong angle.

Rojas took a deep breath thinking of an idea that was very dangerous, but if he succeeded then everything was going to be restored to its previous order and the chaos was going to be stopped once and for all. Jensen was the king of the chaos and if the king was removed from his place in the kingdom and his power was cut off, then all he could do was to admit that he has been defeated or die in vain for trying to hold his place at the table and believe that he can't be defeated.

With a determination that he never felt before Juan Rojas turned the black Escalade for 360 degrees.

"What are you doing Rojas?!" Jensen screamed.

"I'll explain everything to you boss. But, we need to get back."

"Why?!"

Rojas looked at the green-grey eyes of his boss and smiled internally. Oh man, you have no idea what's waiting for you.

...

Earlier that day, Rojas visited the place where he spent days digging a hole in the ground, just another grave that was going to be a witness for the horrendous way of dying by being buried alive. Rojas was used to this task. Around him were hundreds of graves that were well hidden in the depth of the woods. Like he always did, after he finished digging, he came back at the warehouse, he deleted all previously visited locations. All by one. He left the location of the last grave memorized.

While Rojas remembered that, he prayed that the turtles and whoever was with them survived the explosion and saw the GPS unit. 'Cause if they didn't then he was screwed big time. He was leading his boss into a trap that was going to end his reign once and for all.

 _I should've trusted Leonardo_ , he thought while he explained to Jensen why they were going back. He expected Jensen to explode, but he didn't. Yet, he was pissed off. You could see that by only looking in his mean eyes. They arrived.

...

Donatello parked the vehicle in front of the woods. It was impossible for him to enter further in it without being seen or to risk a flat tire. So everyone, with flashlights in hand and their weapons firmly _glued_ to them, headed to the place where their brother, son and friend was. The road was rough, with indentations and rocks, but they managed to find the place.

"The coordinates say that the exact place of the grave should be right here." Said Donatello.

"Yes, and I think that I found it." Said Mikey as he trained his flashlight on the fresh grave. "And there is shovel so I suggest we better start digging."

Raphael took the shovel and started digging. His heart was beating like crazy and he could hear his heartbeats in his ears. After few minutes of digging they saw a piece of fabric, blue fabric. Raph and the others started digging hands first as they uncovered the head of Leonardo. Carefully they removed the earth from around him and gently lifted his limp body.

Then they heard footsteps.

…

 _ **Sorry for the cliffhanger. I already have an idea for chapter 10, but I have to work on it, so I don't know when I will be able to update.**_


	10. It's over

Chapter 10-It's over

Jensen sensed that something was wrong. Rojas was gone for more than 10 minutes. He said he would come back in five, Jensen said to himself, as he watched his surroundings very carefully. He looked at his wrist watch. It was a 7 minutes past 10. The only thing that could be heard was the ticking of the watch's mechanism. Something wasn't right and Jensen started to have a feeling that he was going into a trap. He waited for five more minutes and then he got out of the car. He was going to end this by himself.

...

Leo's fragile body was covered with welts and bruises. He had burn marks on his plastron where the cattle prod penetrated into his body and his wrists and ankles were red, swollen and infected. His left leg was at an odd angle and Natalie concluded that his leg was broken. The stitches on his left arm were thorn and the wound was infected again. Leo had high fever and his breathing was shallow. Everyone noticed the trail of dried blood that ran across Leo's legs and you didn't have to be a doctor to know where it came from. It was a miracle how Leo managed to survive, but now the important thing was to get him out of here and treat his wounds properly.

They heard the footsteps clearly and prepared themselves. They saw the Latino man approaching them. Natalie took out the gun and aimed at him.

"What are you doing here?"

"I came here in peace. I won't hurt you."

"And why should we trust you?"

"I want to redeem myself for what I've done. And I want to confess everything about the crimes of my boss, Travis Jensen. He did some horrible things (he looked at Leo) and I want you to help me with my plan."

"Your plan?"

"I have Jensen in the car." They all looked at him suspiciously. "I know it all looks sketchy, but let me convince you that my intentions are honest. I'm tired of covering the mess that Jensen makes."

"How come that a hardcore criminal like you changed your mind?"

"While I was driving away from town I started to think of all those years I spent while helping Travis Jensen. He was in the business way before I came to the picture, but I know bastante para que el pudre en la carcel."

"Spill it."

"What happened to your friend isn't right. I should've prevented that, but I didn't. I'm sorry he had to go through that. I'm sorry I had to do some of the horrible things myself."

"What he'd do to our brother? And why?" Raphael asked.

"He tortured him and... raped him."

Thomas gasped at the known pattern and you could see tears glistening in his eyes. Raphael braced himself tighter as to control his anger. He felt Mikey's hand on his shoulder. He smiled inwardly because of his brother. No matter what Mikey was always there to help Raph and to give him some comfort.

"Thanks Mikey." Mikey nodded. Raphael turned and looked into his baby brother. His eyes were filled with tears.

From all four of them Michelangelo was the one turtle that was sensitive and always feared for his brothers. He was afraid for Leo now that they finally found him. Their primary task was to find and rescue Leo. They made it so far. But right now Leonardo was fighting for his life. He was definitely going to heal from the physical wounds, but there were mental injuries that you couldn't see so easily. Leo was going to need all the help and support they could provide. Raph stared at the man that claimed he would tell them anything so they can bust Jensen's ass for all that he's done in his soon-to-be-ended life. He closed his eyes and thought of the day Leo was almost killed by the Shredder. How he was thrown through the window and the fight for their lives at April's.

"We need to move you out of the way before Jensen notices that you planned on his betrayal. Donnie you and the others take Leo to the Battle shell. Tom and I will handle Jensen."

At that moment Jensen came out of the shadows. "You said it well Ms. Akita. Move him out. But, I bet he didn't tell you the top story."

"What story? And how do you know my name?"

Jensen laughed. He put his hand on his gun just to point out that he had the advantage and that he would kill them if he wanted to. "It was so fun... ordering the hit on your loved Darren. He thought he could double cross me, but I double crossed him. With only one phone call my problem was solved. It wasn't tough to convince Oroku Saki to kill your husband. It was such a shame that your beautiful five year old daughter had to be sacrificed. She paid for her father's sins."

"What are you talking about?"

"I'm talking about that your beloved husband worked for me Ms. Akita. One day he thought that he was smarter than me and expressed his opinion. Rule number one in my world is "Never reveal your thoughts unless they are productive for the business". You see, your husband wanted out. He finally realized who I was. I couldn't let that happen. I managed to conceal my true identity for more than twenty years. And no rich fool could oppose me. Plus no man alive gets to tell the stories of the Grey Man and his true identity. Your husband had to die. He was the exception of the rule. And he was so deep into the job, that in no way whatsoever I would've allowed him to live furthermore."

Natalie was fuming by the time Jensen finished. "I don't believe you Jensen."

"You don't or you don't want to? I'm sure that this hijo de puta can explain it all to you. He was witness to everything I did including the murder of your husband. Come on ask him. Ask him!"

Natalie was doubting herself. If this was true then that meant only one thing. Everything that Darren Williamson told her about him and his life was a big fat lie. She wasn't even sure if he loved her. On the other hand he was the most loving and caring father. How could he work for a monster like Jensen? But, this wasn't her fight. It was Leonardo's fight and she had to focus on that now. He hadn't much time. His body endured an immense trauma and he lost a lot of blood. He had an infection and if it wasn't treated properly he could just die on them right there and right now. Leonardo's life was at stake. She couldn't risk his life now. It wasn't worth it. Even if she was told the whole truth about Darren, she wouldn't agree on anything that Jensen offered.

"Are you going to ask him or should I?"

"No, I won't ask him."

"Fine. Rojas, tell her the truth."

Rojas hesitated a little, but when he saw the deadly glow in Jensen's eyes he started talking. "He is right, Ms. Akita. Your husband was working for us. One day he announced that he wants out of the business. That's when Mr. Jensen contacted Oroku Saki and asked him for a favor."

"Thank you Rojas. Now, do you believe in my words Ms. Akita? Or you still believe in your late husband? I'm sure that every average person by now would see that I'm not bluffing. I may be a man that tortures people for fun, but I always tell the truth. Always. And when I say that your husband was working for me, then he was working for me. That simple."

Natalie was stunned for few seconds before regaining her composure and stance. She couldn't let her true feelings to appear on the surface. She masked them as best as she could. Her grandpa always said to her that she had one hell of a poker face.

"What now?" Asked Natalie.

"Now you retreat and let me have my revenge."

"If you think that I will let you close to Leonardo once more..."

"He needs to die."

"And why is that?"

"He saw too much. My business..."

"Your business? You think I'll let you live after all you did?" Thomas said angrily

"Tom don't stoop on his level."

"Oh, the lame detective that couldn't save his little sister. I liked the sound of her screams. She begged for more."

"You bastard!"

"Thomas, stop!" Natalie screamed as she and Raphael held him by his arms.

Natalie felt the anger bubble up in her throat, too. And she was far more dangerous than Thomas and Raphael together. She killed a man on impulse once and she strained herself from putting a bullet between his eyes, or lodging the Katana right through his heart. The fact was, we all have a dark sight. But, right then she remembered Master Yoshi's words.

 _"Natalie, you should_ _never let the anger wash over you. The anger could make you do bad things. Instead of listening to your angry heart, try and think of something else, of better times, take deep breaths and allow the anger to subside. You can defeat your opponent only when you think straight. If you let the anger guide you in a battle, your opponent can easily defeat you if he catches on your insecurity. And remember young one, the man who lives without honor will die without honor."_

Natalie snapped back to reality. Her voice was calm, and her posture perfect. With one hand she held the Katana, and with the other she secured the gun.

"I guess I interrupted your party. Rojas, did you tell to your new friends why we grabbed Leonardo?"

"Uh, no Sir."

"Tell them. After all it was your idea to talk."

"But..."

"Don't worry Rojas they won't live through the night to tell the story."

Rojas gritted his teeth as he turned to face the others. At that moment Jensen raised his gun and aimed at Rojas.

"Rojas, get down!" Natalie yelled, but it was too late. The bullet entered in his body. The second favorite thing of Jensen's after torturing people was killing his enemies from behind their back. Sneak-aim-kill.

...

Jensen's bullet pierced Rojas's left kidney and lodged into his spine. He fell on the ground.

"You really thought that I would let you to tell them the reason you fool? One truth is enough. Now prepare to meet your Maker." Jensen fired once more and Rojas was dead on impact. "Now, who shall be first to join him on his ride back home?"

Raphael yelled as he plunged a sai in Jensen's right arm. Jensen was quick. He stored his gun and backhanded Raphael. He flew over to the nearest tree. Donatello tried to take Jensen down with his Bo staff, but with his good hand Jensen managed to snatch Don's staff and hit him in the stomach. He took out the air out of his lungs. Jensen disposed of the Bo, and picked up his gun again. Natalie looked in awe as Jensen trained the gun on Thomas. Mikey and Splinter were helping Raphael and Donatello to stand up, and April and Casey defended Leo. It all happened in slow motion like in the movies. Natalie pushed Thomas out of the way. She pulled her gun and shot Jensen in the left shoulder. Jensen let go off his gun and fell on his back. It took him a minute or two before he came to his senses and got up. His wounds hurt like hell and he couldn't feel his right arm. The stab wound from the sai was paralyzing. He knew that he won't get far with those injuries but he had to try. He ran away, but Raphael was hot on his heels. The red clad ninja wasn't at the top of his game, but the adrenaline rush was driving him tonight. After all he heard about what happened to his older brother and to all those innocent people that Jensen harmed and killed he couldn't just sit on his butt and do nothing. He ran after the monster that was bold enough to torture Leo.

"You can run, but you can't hide Jensen!" Raphael yelled.

"Raphael, son come back!" Splinter yelled after him.

"Raphie!" Mikey called after his older brother

"Raph won't stop. I'm going after him." Said Donatello.

"No, Donnie you stay here. I'll go after him." Said Natalie "Help them Thomas."

"Natalie, Jensen is dangerous."

"You think I don't know that Tom? I need to help Raph."

"I'm coming with you. I'm not leaving you tonight."

"Fine."

Both Natalie and Thomas went in the direction where Jensen disappeared. Soon they were able to follow his trail since he left broken branches on the ground and ruffled leaves. They could hear parched screams, and when they came to the place where the screams cams from, the sight made them sick. Raph was on top of Jensen, beating him up like it was the punching bag.

...

Natalie grasped Raphael by the shoulders and managed to take him away from the gruesome scene. "Raph! Raph! Raph it's over. He is dead. Stop! He is dead!" She cuddled him in her arms and tried to calm him down. Raphael was panting and his hands were bloody. After few moments Raphael realized what he'd done and he started to have second thoughts. He never wanted to become killer, yet he killed his brother's tormentor. He felt like he betrayed everyone, his family, his friends, even the Bushido code that his older brother so much followed. He threw up. As he continued to heave he could feel Natalie's presence at his side. She was there for him, he knew that, but right now he thought she would lecture him about his anger. She was right to do that.

"Hey Raph, you okay?"

"No." It was the first time in ages that Raph admitted that he wasn't okay. His tough demeanor vanished in a second "I'm not okay Nat. I killed a man. No matter how evil he was, I killed him. I became like him. I am a murderer."

Natalie hugged him as he cried in her shoulder. He couldn't hide his tears anymore, and it didn't matter after all. "Raph, we have to go." She gently whispered.

"I know." And just like that Raph became his old self. He wiped the tears that were staining his cheeks and headed back.

"Tom are you coming?"

"Yeah, just to pick up this thug."

"Why would you do that?"

"I can't call the police and tell them that I found Jensen and Rojas dead in the woods. There would be a lots of questions and investigation. If they trace that bullet to your gun, then you are cooked. Plus how would you explain the stab wound in his arm when clearly there isn't any knife or any other sharp object?"

"You are right."

"I'm going to bury them in the grave that was meant for Leo. You guys go and help Leo."

"You sure?"

"Yes. And make sure that you dispose of your gun. You will report that it was stolen tomorrow morning. Throw the remnants of the gun in East River."

"Thank you for all that you did for us Tom."

"It's nothing. I want to help them. Clearly no one was there for them. They had to go through life alone. I know the feeling. I felt an obligation to help them in this situation." She hugged him and entered in the Battle shell.

...

Donatello was throbbing all over from the blow he received with his own Bo. He had trouble driving, but he managed to do it. Raphael and Michelangelo clung to each other. Raph didn't say a word on his way back. They all knew what he'd done when he appeared out of the woods, with bloody hands, and Thomas behind him with Jensen's body over his shoulder. April and Casey were trying to understand what happened to their friends. First, it was the gunshot wound, now it was more than that. Their world has been turned upside down.

Master Splinter took one of Leonardo's hands and squeezed it in an attempt to reach out to his son. Suddenly they all heard a gurgling sound and then nothing. Leonardo collapsed. Natalie performed CPR and then mouth-to-mouth. After couple of minutes Leonardo came back, but it was of an essence to get him to her apartment. They couldn't risk the hospital.

"Don?"

"Yes?"

"Can I drive the Battle shell? You are hurt and I can see you have trouble with the drive. Get here and make sure that Leonardo is breathing till we get to my apartment."

Donatello nodded and stopped the vehicle. Natalie took his place and as soon as she grabbed the wheel, she floored the Battle shell. She took a sharp turn left and headed into NYC traffic.

"Donatello you teached Ms. Akita how to drive the Battle shell I suppose?"

"No Master Splinter. She got her driver's licence regularly." Don smirked.

"It looks like she is driving just like you."

"No worries Sensei. She has this situation under control."

...

Natalie put the key in the lock and turned the key in the bolt twice. The door clicked open. She entered in her apartment, deactivated her alarm system and turned on the lights. Natalie's apartment was huge. There was the living room, the kitchen on its left. There were two bathrooms and few spare rooms. One of the rooms was Natalie's room, and the others were used for guests. But that was on the outside. On the inside Natalie's apartment was converted into an OR with special equipment, and one additional room that was reserved for patients.

Natalie explained to the guys quickly that when her family died (when they were killed) her father asked her to move here. He bought this apartment for her. At first the apartment consisted only of the living room, the kitchen, one bathroom and few spare rooms. Later on, the owners of the apartment next door wanted to sell it. The man in the house got an amazing job opportunity in Hollywood (he was film producer) and they moved out of it. Natalie didn't know that her father bought the apartment. For Christmas that year, Natalie was invited to spend few days in his father's house in LA. She agreed and took the first plane to LAX. In the next days her father via phone connection set up the apartment with the latest technology and the necessary medical equipment. He even built a passageway between Natalie's apartment and this one carefully hidden behind the walls. Natalie's father grew up reading mystery novels and he was fascinated by secret passageways both in books and movies. He decided that his daughter would love the idea to help people in her own comfort zone. After a week in LA, walking on some of the most famous beaches, visiting the one and only Malibu, getting a close look on the Hollywood heel, and walking down the Walk of Fame, she decided to go home. After all New York was her home town and she was feeling home sick. Her father expressed the wish to go with her. She agreed. Both of them arrived in NYC, on December 27th 2004. Natalie unlocked the door. As soon as she entered in her apartment she sensed that something happened to the apartment. She could feel the change and the presence of something, just like Master Splinter could. She asked her father about it and he smirked. He took her by the hand and showed her the secret passageway and the connection with the apartment next door. Natalie was left speechless by her father.

Since then she helped a lot of people that needed attention and that couldn't afford a hospital stay, in her free time. There weren't many people, but those that came to her door were in debt with her. From time to time she received gifts in the form of food and clothes and other accessories that were left on her doorstep by the people she helped to. After few weeks of using the passageway she decided to put a code on it, so no one except her had access to it. She also did that to the door of the apartment. If someone tried to harm her or the equipment they would have to deal with the code first. Right now, Natalie punched few buttons on the interphone that was hung on the wall. The sliding door opened, and Natalie jammed the door with a chair so it won't close and the turtles will have access in and out if her private OR.

Leonardo was placed on a bed and Natalie hooked few monitors on him that kept a clean bill of his vitals. She needed to stabilize him and after the collapse in the car it was of an utmost importance for Leonardo to be carefully handled. She checked his vitals. There was no change. His blood pressure was still low 50/90, the heart rate was 90 bits per minute, and his temperature was at 39 degrees Celsius. Natalie injected him with a medicine to reduce the fever, and it worked. There was no internal bleeding, thank God. Leonardo was stable for now, but there was still a lot of work to be done. She concluded that the blood loss wasn't that big and that blood transfusion won't be necessary.

After she finished her initial preparation of Leonardo's body on his way to healing, Natalie came to the living room where the three turtles, the rat and the two humans were waiting for her. She cleared her throat and spoke.

"Don you will help me with Leo." Said Natalie.

"Nat I don't know if I can do that. I've read few medical books so far, and treated the wounds of my brothers after the battles we went into, but besides that I don't know anything else. I'm the engineer. It's not time to play doctors."

"Listen Donatello your brother is in grave danger! (She gasped at her choice of words) I can do it by myself, but I need an assistant right now. I am not in a great shape myself. One wrong move and I may kill him. As much as I'm concerned you have just the perfect medical knowledge I need so far. And pardon me, but every and each one of the people that are in this room can't help me. Raphael is too angry and he'll probably end up breaking everything in there. Michelangelo will possibly cry his eyes out at the sight of his brother. Casey is not my first choice regarding medical instruments. April, well April may be the one person besides you that can help me, but not now. Master Splinter is old enough and he could not possibly stand very long. No offense."

All of them nodded in understanding. Natalie was right. The genius and the brains of the family was the only logical choice to be her assistant.

"Okay I'll help you out Nat." Said Donnie dejectedly. He really wanted to help his brother, but he didn't want to hurt him anymore than he already was.

"I know what are you thinking Donnie. You'll do just fine. Now take off your elbow and knee pads, the wrist bands and your belt. Also take off your Bo. Then wash your hands with a disinfectant and soap. There is a uniform right over there, put it on. The gloves are there and the masks are in the first drawer. Move, we have a lot of work to do."

Donatello listened and did all of what was asked from him.

…

Natalie removed Leonardo's knee pads, wrist bands and elbow pads carefully. His wrists were infected, and swollen and there was some earth that entered in the open wounds.

Next, she bathed Leonardo, carefully removing every grain of earth that was glued to his body. After she thoroughly washed him, she proceeded with the next phase. "Don you clean up his wrists and put bandages on them after you are finished. I'll focus on cleaning his rectum."

"Um… Maybe we should switch tasks?" Asked Donnie. Natalie read his body language and the meaning of his question. She understood perfectly what Donatello was trying to say to her.

"Okay, you are on. After you are finished you will help me with the leg. We need to set it right."

"Done deal."

For a long time Donatello and Natalie did their job. Both of them were silent. Donatello observed Natalie while she tended to his brother. She was so peaceful and focused while doing what she did and she kinda reminded him of Leo himself. When Leo was focused on something he would definitely get to the bottom of it. Natalie had that focus in her eyes and that determination in her demeanor. Donnie asked himself how she felt on the inside knowing what Leo went through. As a trauma surgeon she sure as shell saw all kinds of gruesome sights and heard the stories of the people that she operated on, but she never got close enough to a patient like she did with Leo. For her it was personal now, since the same man that hurt Leo ordered the hit on her family. She was hurt in that attack and it was damn personal for her now.

Natalie was cleaning the wounds on Leonardo's wrists as careful as possible. Few low moans escaped from Leonardo while she tended his wounds. She gently wrapped his wrists with bandages. Then she sewed the gun shot wound after cleaning it up again. She tended to his cuts and bruises and on the few places on his plastron where there were burn marks from the cattle prod she put a cream and then band aids.

"I'm done." Said Donnie.

Natalie nodded in understanding as she tried to stitch Leonardo's split lip. It took her few tries until she set the things right. After that she cleaned the dirt that prevented Leonardo from breathing right, and washed his mouth as to remove any dirt left. Right after she did that she placed an oxygen mask over Leonardo's nose and mouth. Now the worst part of the job came. Donatello waited for Natalie to administer a syringe into Leo's infusion, filled with a painkiller and an anesthetic. They needed him deep asleep on this 'cause it was bad enough what he went through, he didn't need additional pain.

"What I want you to do Donnie is to hold Leo still, while I set his leg straight."

"Okay."

Don did what was asked from him. Natalie took Leonardo's left leg in her hands and twisted it few times until she set it just as it was supposed to be. Something cracked and Donnie's heart caught up in his throat at the thought of the horrible things his brother went through.

After that was over, Natalie bandaged the leg and put a cast on it. Then she threw the gloves, the uniform and the mask in the bin. Donatello did the same thing.

Natalie sighed.

"Now all we can do is wait my friend. He is stable for now, his fever has broken, his wounds are tended and I think that his breathing is just fine." Natalie said "It will be better if you and the others get some rest. Tell April and Casey to go home. They are exhausted and they need rest too. We will call them if there is a need of that. There are spare rooms in my apartment, settle in as you wish. I have alarm in my room so if there are any changes in Leonardo's state I will know immediately."

"Your wish my command, Chief!" Don said sarcastically.

Natalie chuckled and left for her room.


	11. Story of my life

Chapter 11-Story of my life

Natalie was dead tired when she left her operating room. It was thanks to her father that she had a small operating room in her apartment for just in case and she was very grateful for that. They couldn't go to the hospital for they were afraid that someone will be there watching and the only solution was her apartment.

After all they've been through in the last three days, Natalie truly felt the turtles to be her next family. But, that would be short lived. She was ill and it wasn't an illness that would just go away with antibiotics. She was afraid to even admit it to herself. She put that information in the back of her brain, and forgot about it. Until she saw Leonardo collapse in the Battle shell. That opened her eyes. It was her idea to come to her apartment. They couldn't risk Leonardo's life after they've been through hell to save him.

...

The two remaining turtles occupied the big couch in the living room. April and Casey sat on the small couch hugging each other, afraid for Leo. Master Splinter sat in a big rocking chair, meditating. Only he could be so calm in this type of situation.

Not knowing was worse than knowing about it. The waiting was even worse than not knowing. It ticked Raph. Well Raph could be easily ticked off by anything, but with everything that happened his emotions were raw and he was a bomb waiting to explode. It was almost two hours since he put a stop on Travis Jensen's life. He thought it thoroughly and he knew it was wrong when you took someone's life. He regretted that he let his temper to drive him into doing something that couldn't be so easily undone as a ripped page from a book or already eaten pizza. This was man's life and you couldn't just go on the other side and bring the man back. _Whatever, the scumbag deserved what he got_ , said Raph to himself, as he felt a shiver. But, that didn't make him feel better. It actually made things worse. It made him think about what would the others think of him.

Splinter hadn't said a word since they got Leonardo and headed back to New York. Raph was worried that Splinter would hate him for what he did. He deserved that after all. He was the worst son of all of his brothers. The hothead. The one that jumped into conclusions too soon. The one that always gets in trouble. There was this other side of Raphael, that he rarely showed. The caring side. He already let the others see him cry once. Not happening again. They all knew his tough demeanor was the hideout of a more gentle and understanding Raphael.

"Son what troubles you?" He heard Splinter saying behind him.

 _Isn't it obvious?_ He thought to himself. "Nothing Sensei. Just thinking of stuff."

"I know what you are thinking of Raphael."

 _He always does that_ , said Raphael's inner voice.

"And believe me I understand what you are going through. Hadn't killed a man in my life, but lost my Master in a similar way so I already know how it feels to be a witness. I know that you didn't intend to do that. You were protecting Leonardo, and your other brothers. You were protecting me and our human friends. You were protecting yourself. I think that all of them agree with me when I say that if it weren't for your actions maybe we wouldn't have been here having this conversation right now."

Three tired heads nodded.

"But Master Splinter I killed the man. I can't live with such a thing. And what will Leo say when he wakes up and finds out I killed someone?"

"You have to, my son. Now it is part of you, of who you are as a person. Try to meditate upon this matter and don't go hard on yourself. Your brother needs you now more than ever. He's been wounded before, but the healing process involves not only physical, but also mental healing. You need to take over on the position of a leader while Leonardo is recovering from his wounds. You have to be strong. For him and for the others. You have to show them that they are not alone, that they have you. Now is not the time to blame yourself for something that can't be undone. Acceptance is the clue. Living with it is the solution. When you understand all of what I'm saying now, you will be able to let go my son. And don't worry about Leonardo. He loves you as a brother and I'm sure that after you tell him why you did what you did, he'll forgive you." Splinter was aware that Raphael wasn't telling him everything and he figured that the only one that he'll tell what was bothering was currently unconscious.

Raph closed his eyes and nodded. He wasn't going to cry in front of his Sensei. He was stronger than that. And now was just the right time for Raphael to show that strength. Splinter said that he'll use one of the rooms as his to sleep in and left the two turtles and April and Casey alone.

He was the most worried of all. Like a father of four, his greatest fears came to light. He feared that one day his sons were going to face something dangerous. He wanted to protect them from everything and everyone, but he knew he couldn't do that. He wished the boys had a mother too. He had to be substitute for a long time. But, he enjoyed being a father. There wasn't anything in the world that made Splinter happier than his four sons. Now he was afraid he failed his eldest son.

...

Raph observed the occupants of the living room. Mikey, that was half asleep, used his shell as a stupor. With only one look Raph knew that Mikey won't hold any longer. He was about to tell him to get some sleep when Donnie and Natalie got out of the secret passageway. Donnie came to the living room while Natalie went to her room. Mikey jumped from where he was seated and looked at Donnie with his big eyes. No questions asked, the look was enough for Donnie to talk.

"He is fine Mikey. He is asleep now and he will be for few more hours until the anesthesia wears off. Natalie said that we should all rest and that if there is some change with Leo, she will tell us. April, Case, she said that you should go home."

"Okay Donnie. But call if anything happens."

"I will."

They said goodbye and everyone went in a separate room.

...

Natalie went into her room. She showered and threw the bloody clothes in the bin. She dried her hair and put on a sweat pants and a black t-shirt. She saw her reflection in the mirror and she noticed that she looked thinner than before. She hoped that the guys won't notice. The illness was taking its toll on her, and the last thing the guys needed right now was one more person to worry about. Leonardo was enough. After a while, when Leonardo would get better she will tell them.

"Want a company?"

Natalie jumped at the sight of Raphael holding two glasses and a bottle of red wine. "Sure." She smiled.

"Sorry that I scared you. But, I'm a ninja." He closed the door with the leg, like kicking his worst enemy. "I needed someone to talk to." Said Raphael.

Natalie was surprised by his openness. She would expect everything from Raphael, but this was just too much for her right now. She totally misjudged his character. Well she got something right.

"I'm here for ya."

"I am not the guy that talks too much, that's Mikey, but I... What Leo went through opened my eyes and I decided that I should work on my personality and my expression more. And Master Splinter said something that makes sense now. He said that I'm the leader now and that my brothers need me. If I'm not strong enough for them, they might break under the pressure. Instead of feeling sorry for myself, I have to let go of what happened and move on." Natalie nodded. "I want you to know that I'm not good at this..." Said Raphael.

"You don't have to say twice." Natalie smiled. Raphael stopped like he was kicked outside of the room, but then he sat on the sofa on the left side from the bed. He opened the bottle and poured wine for both of them. He handed one of the glasses to Natalie.

"Are you sure you want to drink that? I don't think it will do you any good."

"I need something strong, and the wine was the only thing I found."

"I see. Next time I'll just buy Balantine."

"I'm in."

Raphael sighed.

"What I wanted to say Natalie is... Argh, I suck at this."

"No, don't stop. Go on."

"I just wanted to say thanks. I realized that I hadn't said thanks to you and you helped us in many ways. You helped us plan the rescue. You helped us free Leo, and you stood up for us in that forest... You stood up for me. I know that the only ones that could do that for me are my brothers and father, but you fought for me. You saved my life. Thank you for that. Here I said it."

"You are welcome Raph. Like I said, I'm always here. But, somehow I think that you came here for something else."

"You are right. I came here to talk to you about you. Maybe we know each other for a week, but I have the feeling that I know you for a very long time. And believe me when I say, I do feel you as my friend and I tend to think of you as my older sister."

"Thanks."

"I have noticed some changes on you. You lost some weight. And you winced when you kneeled to see the structure of the bomb under the car seat. Clearly, you weren't hit in the stomach when we fought the Purple Dragons last night."

 _Very astute assessment_ , Natalie thought to herself.

"I could see that you were exhausted by the time we went into the woods, but you didn't say a word. Also you asked Donnie to help you out when you could've patched up Leo by yourself. What's going on Natalie?"

Natalie was surprised by Raphael. He didn't strike her as the type of personality that would ask a straight question, but no one was the same after what they heard and what they saw. Raph was no exception. He tried to be better and to make himself useful. After few moments of silence Natalie voiced her worst fear.

"I'm dying Raph. I have leukemia." Raphael almost choked on the wine.

"You are fuckin' kidding me right?"

"Nope. I am sick. Been for a while."

"Why... Why didn't you say something?"

"You have enough problems on your own don't need mine too."

"This is not a problem Natalie. This is your life we are talking about." Raph was hurt and he could feel the tears veil in his eyes. He knew that Natalie won't tell the others, so he cried himself out. He cried and screamed curses and promises. "Why you? What have you done wrong? First Leo, now you. Why?"

"I'm afraid I don't have the answer of that question Raphael. But I believe that everything happens for a reason."

"You are still too young. You can't die. You have to fight! You have to! I won't let this happen." With that Raph stood up and paced up and down the room until he felt dizzy and he almost dropped on the floor, when Natalie caught him.

"I suggest you sit down and try to rest. We can talk tomorrow."

"No. I don't want to sleep. If I go to sleep then I'll have nightmares of what happened."

"It's understandable after what you went through. It's not an easy thing to kill a man no matter how justified his murder is. I know that. But you have to go to sleep eventually."

"I know. I'm just glad that Jensen won't hurt my brother ever again."

"Me too. How about some more wine?"

"Sounds great."

In the next couple of hours Natalie and Raphael sat in her dimly lit room and drank wine over a small talk. "Tell me about your life Nat."

"What about my life Raph?"

"Tell me, how'd you spent your childhood, about your family, whatever. Just talk to me. I hate to admit that, but I don't like quiet. I think I'll go crazy if it's quiet."

"Yeah, I don't like quiet too."

"I am worried about Leo. He was hurt many times, but nothing was like this. He wasn't prepared for this."

"I know. The good news is that he will heal from the physical wounds. The bad news is that his mental injuries won't heal that fast. He'll need time. And patience from all of you. He may not react well of touching and yelling."

"I understand. I am willing to help my brother even if that means that I have to stay calm and not do anything that may upset him. I won't do anything that may hurt him more than he already is. And I'll always listen. And I'll get used to quiet for him if I have to."

"That's fine by me."

"Actually I am a good listener, but most of the time I just don't have the patience to sit around and hear other people's stories. Don't get me wrong, but sometimes I'm really pissed off of some people's choices and others' fates."

"I understand what you are trying to say Raph. I know that deep inside you have compassion for all of your close ones and you feel like you can't do anything to prevent what's happening."

"Exactly."

"My Grandpa told me once that you can't undone what has been done already, but that if you may prevent something bad from happening then your obligation as a human being is to do it."

"Wise man."

"Yeah, he was. He took me to Japan every summer until he died. He always told me stories of the Japan of his childhood. He introduced me to Master Yoshi. Thanks to him I was able to learn the art of ninjitsu and how to fight. I became a martial artist because of him. He always told me stories about his great love Tang Shen. And he had this pet rat that I believe you have known for a long time."

"Yeah. He's been a great father to us."

"My mother loved her father very much as I was told. My Grandma died shortly after their arrival to New York. My mom and my uncle were my Grandpa's only company. They helped him in the bakery when not studying and soon he let go of the pain. But, then my uncle died too. Car accident. After that my Grandpa wasn't the same. He would always go with my mom wherever she went. After she married my father they agreed to live in my Grandpa's house. He was very happy to have them around. The house was big enough for all of them. With the years my father renovated the house and added few more rooms for his future kids."

"As far as I know you are only child."

"Yes, but that's because my mom died on birth."

"I'm sorry."

"Yeah. You can imagine how devastated was my Grandpa. His whole family was now dead. I was the only one left alive." Natalie paused. "He always said that I was a carbon copy of my mother, his beloved daughter. He loved me very much. He was like my guardian angel. I know that I felt safe with him. My father continued to share the house with my Grandpa. He always did his best to show me how much he loved me. After my Grandpa's death, my father was the only relative I had left. He loves me unconditionally. He bought me this apartment after Darren and Lea died and he bought me the equipment in the operation room for emergency, like I told you before."

"He seems like a nice guy."

"He is. Currently he is out of town, his real estate company has some annual reunion in LA. He'll be back next week. He spends most of his time in LA anyway."

"Have you told him about your illness?"

"Not yet."

"You have to tell him. He deserves to know."

"I'll tell him don't worry."

"Is there anything we can do to help you?"

"Be there for me?"

"Absolutely."

Raph hugged Natalie. It wasn't like him to show his emotions, but tonight everything was allowed. Everyone's emotions were raw and everyone was on edge.

"At least you have Mister Detective."

"Raph, I told you not to tease me about Tom."

"And you told me that you will discuss on that matter after we find Leo. Well, we found Leo and I think you owe me a conversation."

"And I thought that Donatello was the turtle with the eidetic memory."

"Spill."

"Okay. Me and Mr. Detective as you call him met few months ago. I wasn't particularly interested to start dating, but after few nights out, I felt something for him. At first I thought that I was betraying Darren, but I learned that one has to move on in order to be happy again." Raphael nodded.

"Everyone deserves a second chance in life Nat. I know that you loved your husband and all, but I'm glad that you gave yourself a second chance to be happy."

"I hadn't told him yet. I mean, he knows that I feel something, but I hadn't told him that I love him."

"You will tell him when it's time. And I'm sure he'll be by your side no matter what. He has honor. And you can see from a long distance that he loves you. The way he looks at you when you smile, the way he wants to protect you… I think that says it all."

"Right."

"After what we've heard of Darren, I don't think highly of him anymore. If he was able to lie to you about his job who knows what else he lied you about. I know it's not nice to talk bad about dead people, but still."

"That thought crossed my mind too Raph."

"You deserve to be happy Natalie. If that means being in love with someone that's not Darren then so be it. We don't get always second chances in life." He choked on his words.

"I know what you are thinking Raph. And you are right about that. But, right now there is nothing you or anyone else can do about my illness. It's there and nothing could prevent it. There are few options, but neither one will end pretty. I know it's tough on you and it's tough on me too. Today for the first time after I found out about the illness I accepted the fact that I am going to die."

Raph nodded. All that Natalie said made sense. He looked at the digital clock on the night stand. 3:49 a.m. It was almost 4 in the morning and for three days neither one of them had slept normally. He decided to listen to Natalie's advice. After all Leo won't be awake for few more hours. He stood up.

"I'll try and get some rest. See ya in the morning Nat." He said.

"See ya Raph."

Natalie carefully closed the door.


	12. Just an ordinary day

Chapter 12-Just an ordinary work day for detective Thomas Hayden

Some people say that sometimes it's easy to be someone else. Some days it's too easy. But, for Detective Thomas Hayden, being someone else wasn't very easy. In fact it wasn't very difficult either. He lifted Travis Jensen's body and brought him to the makeshift grave dug by Juan Rojas that was also lying on the ground dead. Well, there was this proverb that says "When someone digs a grave for the other, he will fall into it". In Rojas' case it was true. He was following an order from his boss, but that order hit him back.

Thomas promised to Natalie that he would take care of the bodies, and that there will be much time before someone finds them. It was the first time that Tom was going to do the dirty work.

He worked undercover many times throughout his career, and witnessed violence first hand, but now he was the one who will cover his tracks instead of the bad guys that he put behind bars.

Tom was thinking of how his life changed just in one day. Yesterday he was just a nice NYPD detective sitting on his desk, filling out forms and working on ongoing cases. But, this morning, when Natalie entered through the door of the 2-7 precinct* he knew that his life was going to change completely. What started like something occasional, it turned out to be more than that.

…

He met Natalie Akita few months before when he was shot on duty. It wasn't a big injury, just a bruise from the bullet that lodged into his vest, but he needed to go to the hospital. There she was, Natalie covering for a fellow doctor. She tended his injury, and he caught himself staring at the beautiful young woman.

Few days after that event, Thomas Hayden was driving around the city to clear his head. They just put behind bard a child molester, and he was stunned to see that he parked his Chevy truck in front of the hospital. Then he noticed the doctor getting out of the hospital. He got out of the car and approached her. At first she was surprised by him, being there, but she soon found herself with him in a bar.

At first she didn't want to go out, thought it was too soon after her family's death, but there wasn't something in Thomas Hayden that gave her comfort. She enjoyed to be in his company, and soon she told him everything about her, and her family, about her childhood, her studies at the Medical University, and how in 2004, she lost both her husband and her daughter, and she herself was badly wounded.

Tom was fascinated by her story, he hadn't thought that something like this could happen to a woman like Natalie for a short period of life. First, she lost her mother, actually she never even met her, since she died on childbirth. Then she lost her Grandfather, and then her father moved to Los Angeles permanently since his job was there. Like that wasn't enough, The Shredder killed her husband Darren, and her daughter Lea, and wounded her. She was left on the pavement watching her husband and daughter perish, and she survived all of that. Of course the survival came with a price in the form of Natalie's scar on her left arm.

Tom tried to talk her to operate the scar and restore the functioning of her hand to full 100%, but she denied. Natalie always said that the scar serves as a reminder to what happened to her and her family not so long ago, and that she won't do anything to change that. Plus the scar is part of her now, of who she is, of who she became after the horrible tragedy.

Tom accepted her explanation and never spoke of the scar again. He figured that the topic about the brutal murder of Darren and Lea Williamson won't do any good to Natalie and their starting relationship, so he kept his mouth shut. But it was like someone or something was against Thomas, because with everything that happened in the last day or so, the topic about her husband and daughter popped up again.

Thomas felt sick while listening to all that happened to them, but what really ticked him off was that Leonardo, the mutant turtle, he hadn't even met before today, had gone through the same ordeal as his late sister. He, at least survived.

Thomas knew what it was to hold a grudge and feel like you can't live anymore, and he had a feeling that Leonardo will need all the help he could get from his family and friends. And he would make sure to help them too.

…

He placed the two bodies in the hole and squeezed them to make them more comfortable (good choice of words Tommy) and covered them with earth. When they were completely out of sight, he took the shovel, wiped its handle and crushed it to many pieces. Even if someone found the shovel, there will be no clue to who was touching the handle before the shovel was destroyed. Tom dragged broken branches from around him and covered the area sporadically so no one will suspect that there are bodies buried down there. After he did that, he took the Escalade (since he arrived on the scene with the Battle shell) and drove off. He was careful to avoid traffic cams. He parked the car close to the warehouse on 10th street. Somehow everything came back to that place.

He wiped the GPS data, removed all the prints and fibers from him and the others.

Thomas Hayden broke the law in many ways. He covered for two murders that happened in front of his eyes (three if you count Hun's murder that he was told of), he buried their bodies, helped the perpetrator (s) to get away with murder (not that anyone would believe him that a giant teenage mutant ninja turtle killed one of them), but still it was a crime and Tom was always against crime. Now wasn't the time to think of what was right and wrong. The turtles needed help and if he could provide help, then so be it.

Tom walked down to the street where there was a bus stop. He caught the first bus and he kept a low profile as much as he could. He avoided strangers' looks on him and his dirty clothes, and he switched few buses until he arrived at his destination, and that was his apartment on the Upper East Side.

He unlocked his apartment, took his clothes off and showered. Then he carefully placed his clothes in plastic bags and put them all in a different trash cans. He figured out that some homeless man could use them if he finds them, but now wasn't the time to think of what would happen with obvious evidence. Besides Tom didn't want to drag an innocent man to the whole situation. After he walked for few more blocks disposing of the evidence of the crime that occurred almost two hours ago, Thomas Hayden came back to his apartment.

He cleaned his apartment thoroughly (he was little OCD, a trait that he inherited from his mother) and sat on the couch. He was exhausted but he couldn't sleep. He thought of all that happened tonight, and what he was told that happened the night before. He couldn't imagine his beloved Natalie to be a killer, but he understood that it was self-defense. Just like in the warehouse. She protected herself and her new friends.

At first Thomas couldn't believe in the story about the turtles and the rat, but who would? Anyway, he decided to follow his instincts and his instincts told him that those were the good guys and that they won't do anything stupid.

Tom figured out that asking for a day off wasn't an option. If he did that now plus his mysterious disappearance of today would alarm the Chief and the police department and they could investigate. If they started snooping around he could risk the lives of the people that were friends of the woman he loved and with that his friends too.

Thomas was thinking of an excuse that would save him from all the trouble and pep talk that his Chief would give to him the next day. He then looked into the mirror and saw few bruises on his face, some cuts on his arms and swollen lip. He could always claim he was mugged. But, then, his gun wasn't used at all (and it wasn't stolen) and if he was mugged, and he didn't use his gun, that would be beyond suspicion.

"Oh man, what did I get myself into?" Tom asked himself while he went to sleep. He knew that he needed that sleep much for his dislike. It was almost 1 a.m. and he needed to wake up in the morning and go to work. He needed to explain where he went tonight all of a sudden. Most of all he needed to explain his battered face and body. He just hoped that Natalie disposed of the gun like he told her.

So much for a nice average ordinary police detective that does his job and follows the law damn straight.

….

 ***The 27** **th** **precinct in New York Police Department is commonly called the two seven (I learned this in Law and Order)**


	13. Blessing

Chapter 13 - Blessing

Natalie woke up to a headache and nausea. She felt like this for a while now. At first she thought that it was from the illness, but now her stomach hurt, and she noticed something different about her.

She ran to the bathroom almost tripping over Raphael who was getting out of the bathroom.

"Hey Nat, good morning."

Natalie didn't respond, just closed the door and left Raphael wondering what was wrong with her.

"Morning bros."

"Morning Raph." Donnie chimed.

"Morning." Mikey said.

"Where is Master Splinter?"

"Um, he had an early breakfast and he is in his room meditating." Donnie said.

"And Leo?"

"No changes."

"What's for breakfast?"

"There is some milk and cereal if you like. I'm not in the mood for coking anything." Mikey said.

"Hey Mikey lighten up bro. Leo is outta woods, why are you still moody?"

"I guess even a goofball like me needs a break Raphie."

Raphael looked at his brother and didn't say a thing. He couldn't believe in the Mikey he was seeing. Changed Mikey. The tone of his voice was changed. The fact was that they all grew up too fast since they went topside for the first time. Mikey was always the happy go lucky turtle, always ready to tell a joke or pull a prank on his brothers. No matter what, he always had that goofy grin on his face and lightened up their day. Right now, the sparkle in his baby brother's eyes was missing, and Raphael was wondering what happened to the old Mikey that loved life. After what happened to Leo, Mikey was very serious and didn't talk much.

"Why are you staring at me like I've done something wrong Raph?"

"You didn't do anything Mikey. I was just thinking."

"You were thinking? Raph you never think."

"I do."

"No you don't. Braniac and Leo are the ones that think, not you and me."

Raph had to agree on that.

"And you always have to be right Mikey."

"What can I say bro, I know all three of you better than you know yourself."

"Oh yeah?"

"Yeah." Mikey replied with a smirk.

"Okay, I'm done talking." Said Raph "Now where is that milk and the cereal?"

"The milk is in the fridge and the cereal are over there. Waiting for you." Mikey teased.

Don chuckled at his two brothers' talk. They acted just like two normal teenagers would. He sometimes wished they had normal lives. He wished they were normal.

"Hey guys, where is Natalie?" Asked Donatello.

"She went into the bathroom." Raph said "She looked sick."

Then he remembered their conversation few hours ago. Donnie caught the change in Raph and figured that he knew something, but didn't ask what.

"Hey, here she is." Mikey exclaimed.

"Hey guys, good morning."

"Good morning Natalie." The three of them said.

"Why are you looking at me like that Donnie?"

"Raph said that you looked sick this morning. I'm worried."

"I'm fine Don. Just tired that's all."

"Maybe you caught a cold."

"Don't worry. It's nothing Don."

"But, I do worry Nat. I don't want you to feel sick."

"I appreciate what are you trying to do Don, but I'm fine."

Donnie sighed. Damn, this Natalie was stubborn.

Natalie opened the fridge in hopes that she will find something to eat that won't cause her to throw up again. Then she smelled something and she wrinkled her nose. She threw up in the sink, again.

"What's up?"

"Nothing, I guess that I won't eat now, maybe later. I'll take two Tylenols for the pain in the stomach. And this headache just won't go."

Donatello observed his friend.

Raph and Mikey were eating on the dining table, while Donnie helped her sit in one of the chairs.

"I've been thinking Nat... You experience headaches and stomach pains, you just threw up twice. I think you should go and do a checkup. If I didn't know you well, I would say that you are pregnant."

At that moment Raph spit a mouthful of cereal. He locked eyes with Natalie. She smiled at Don's remark and said nothing. Donatello noticed Natalie exchanging looks with his brother. Something was definitely up.

"Okay, something is going on here. Spill it. I see you and Raph sending secret signals the whole morning. And Raph almost choked on his food when I mentioned the p word."

Natalie sighed "Okay, okay. I'm in a relationship with detective Hayden."

Donatello's eyes widened with surprise "You and Tom? I see... Oh, so you actually, you two... This day keeps getting better and better."

"That's good news Nat." Said Mikey "So there is a possibility that Don's guess is right."

"We'll see. I'll meet Thomas later today to report the gun to be stolen as we agreed. On my way back I will go to the hospital and run some tests."

"Fine." Don said and he sat on the table.

After Natalie left them all alone to check on Leo, Don got the chance he was waiting for.

"Raph, what's going on with Natalie?"

"What do you mean by that?"

"You know darn well what I mean Raphael. You send secret signals between each other the whole morning, you went to her room last night, and I saw an empty wine bottle in the sink this morning. You've been acting strange yourself."

"What are you saying Donatello? That I..."

"I'm not saying anything Raph. Just tell me what the hell is wrong?"

Raphael sighed and lowered his gaze on the floor.

"So, there is something?"

Raph nodded. Still with his head down. Not a good sign.

"That bad huh?"

"Mhm."

"Raph you can tell me anything."

"I know. It's just, I don't know if Natalie would approve. I think she'll tell you and the others when the time comes."

"Tell us what Raph?"

"You are making this difficult Donnie. Just leave me alone!"

Raph left the kitchen and closed himself in the room he choose for himself. He wasn't going to tell her secret. If she decided to tell the others, it would be on hers terms, not his.

"And all hell breaks loose. Thank you Raphael, for nearly saying "screw you" to your brother." said Donatello "And I will find out what's going on, just so you know that."

...

Leonardo was recovering from the wounds very well. It's been few days since they brought him in Natalie's apartment. Although she said that the anesthesia would wear off in the hours after she together with Donatello tended his wounds, he didn't wake up as planned. They all kept watch in the hopes that Leo will open up his eyes and get back to them, but he didn't. Donatello suggested that maybe because Leo's body suffered a great trauma, is exhausted and he needs more sleep. He said that maybe Leo needed time before he came back to them.

Natalie thought the same thing, although she didn't like the way Leonardo was retreating to himself, not a little bit. She was witness over the years that patients that came on her table and suffered great trauma, had thought of suicide after they woke up from the induced sleep. It was like they wanted to lose themselves and wake up never again. She was afraid that the same applied to Leonardo, that he was too much consumed by the bad memories that kept him from thinking straight. But, she also knew that Leonardo was a fighter and he won't give up very easily. Leonardo's personality was too much contradictory that Natalie's head was spinning of just thinking of the possibilities. They needed him to wake up, badly. They went stir crazy about Leo's recovery.

...

One day as Natalie changed his IV, she sensed something. Leonardo squeezed her hand and twitched with his eyes. She thought this was it, but he didn't wake up. False alarm. She sighed and left the room. She saw Master Splinter and the turtles in the living room and decided to join them. They were staying with her for the whole time after they rescued Leo. They needed to stay close to him, to feel him. He needed them too. When he wakes up, anyway.

"Any news Ms. Akita?"

"Well there is an improvement. Leonardo just squeezed my hand and twitched with his eyes like he was going to open them, but nothing came out of it."

"What does that mean Natalie?"

"I don't know. But one is for sure. Leonardo wants to come back."

"I woulda been surprised if Fearless didn't want to come back ta us." said Raphael "Hey Nat, what happened to those blood tests that you did few days ago?"

"I'm still waiting on the results."

"Okay."

…

Raphael spent every free second staying by his older brother. Like he promised Natalie he tried to be more patient with Leo. Something he hadn't done before. And it seemed to work.

Sometimes he would talk about something he saw on TV, sometimes he would just sit there and say nothing. Holding his brother's hand was more than enough. It gave him peace of mind.

Michelangelo always told Leo some of his old jokes and laughed at them so his brother would feel normal again. A part of Mikey accepted the current situation and the fact that Leo would never be the same. He tried to fix that. Other part of Mikey lived in that moment where they were toddlers and they still hadn't known what the topside world offers and its horrors.

Donatello was by far the turtle that fussed over his brother thee most. He drove Natalie crazy with all of his theories, the probabilities, and the facts. The kid was really a "Braniac" and he had an eidetic memory. She could understand why his brothers always saw him as the strongest of them, right after Leo.

All of them were worried. Each and every one of them loved Leo. And they missed him...

Donatello caught Natalie watching him from the door.

"What?"

"Nothing. Just watching you take care of Leo. He is blessed to have brother like you and Raph and Mikey. And father as Splinter. Leo is one lucky turtle."

"Well now I don't think he'll think that of himself. You know, when something bad happens Leo tends to draw to himself and be as harsh as Raph is when he has a bad temper, which is always... Anyway, what I wanted to say is that Leo is the protector of the family. When there is no Leo, this family is nothing. If something happens to him, his family, our family won't hold together. You saw them all Nat. They are all broken. Mikey is not Mikey anymore. The light in his eyes is shut off. Raph, well Raph is Raph, but his demeanor is different. At least Master Splinter is acting normal." Donnie stopped in mid-sentence.

"Why did you stop Don?"

"All the time we talk about what's wrong with us, and we forgot you. How do you feel Nat?"

"I'm fine Don is that what you asking."

Donatello sent Natalie one of his "I don't believe you" looks. She knew she couldn't argue with him.

"Fine. The blood test arrived."

"And?"

"And you were right. I'm pregnant Don."

"That's great news Natalie. Congratulations."

"Thank you Donnie."

Donatello hugged Natalie tight.

Suddenly they both heard a sound coming from the bed where Leo lay still. Scratch that, one of his arms was moving. And his eyes were wide open, frantically searching the surroundings and resting his eyes on his brother and their human friend, the doctor.

"What happened? Where am I?" Leo spoke in hoarse voice.

"You are at my apartment Leonardo." Natalie said. "Do you remember what happened prior of your arrival here?"

It took few moments until Leo tried to remember. And he remembered all. You could clearly see the panic in his eyes. And Leo never panicked...

"Leo are you here?" Don hesitantly asked. "Please, say something." Don was dead worried that Leo went still and was actually scared to get closer to his older brother.

"I'm here Don. I ain't going nowhere." Leo smiled weakly. And then just like that the smile was gone.

"Don, go and tell the others. I will check Leo's vitals."

Don was like waiting for that opportunity because he ran off like his feet were on fire.

His brothers and father were in the living room and they all jumped when they heard Donatello entering in the room.

It took him few seconds to get back to his regular breathing.

"What happened my son? Are you alright?"

"Yes, I'm okay. It's Leo... He..."

"What happened to Fearless Donnie?" Raph was on edge.

"Leo is awake."


	14. Fighting the Demons

Chapter 14 –Fighting the Demons

* * *

 _(From Chapter 13)_

 _"What happened my son? Are you alright?"_

 _"Yes, I'm okay. It's Leo... He..."_

 _"What happened to Fearless Donnie?" Raph was on edge._

 _"Leo is awake."_

* * *

…

Shock. After the initial wave of hope they all got few days ago, this was the thing they were waiting for. They wanted Leo to wake up, but kinda wished they had more time to prepare themselves for their brother and son. They didn't realize how hard it was for Leonardo to be back.

First to recover was Raphael that bolted upright and practically ran over Donnie in an attempt to go to Leo's room. He stopped at the entrance of the room. He wasn't sure how he'll find Leo, so he stopped. He was afraid of Leo's reaction. The more accurate, he was afraid of how he'll react to him.

He soon found himself being watched by Leo and he swallowed the lump in his throat and entered in the room.

"Welcome back Leo." He said to his big brother.

"Thanks Raph."

He couldn't help, but look at the sullen face of his brother with the split lip and the dark circles under his eyes. He knew that there were other injuries under the blanket, but he didn't want to recall them as he moved closer to the bed.

"How do you feel?"

"I'm okay. It hurts a little, but I'll live."

Raph closed his eyes and took a deep breath. _What am I supposed to say to him?_

"You don't have to say anything Raph."

"You are reading my mind Fearless?"

"Not exactly, but you have to work on your technique to conceal your emotions Raph." Leo said, his voice sounded even hoarser and his throat burned with every word he spoke. Must've been from the yelling and screaming. "I have lived with you for the past 17, almost 18 years and I know you better than you know yourself."

"I could say the same about you Leo."

Natalie noticed the tension in the air and she spoke hoping to shift the conversation a little. "His vital signs are okay. There will be some time before the wounds heal properly, but I think that everything will be just fine." Said Natalie with a strained voice.

Raphael nodded. Master Splinter and Mikey entered in the room and regarded the now awake Leonardo, while Natalie left the room and joined Donatello in the hall.

"Do you think that he is going to be fine Nat?" he asked with tears in his eyes.

"Eventually he'll be fine. But, I don't know how long it will take until he is back to normal with all that happened to him."

They both looked inside the room where the others were. They both knew what her words meant. Helping Leonardo was easily said than done.

…

Natalie told them all about her pregnancy. Everyone was very happy about it. Except Leo. He was kinda weird. Like he was immune of good news. Thomas was so happy that he'd be a father in few months that he constantly bothered the boys with chattering about what he would do with his son or daughter. He liked the idea to see his girlfriend happy too. But, there was something that loomed over their heads that he could not put his finger on to.

No one said that it would be easy dealing with Leonardo after he woke up, but no one was ready to look at moody and grumpy Leonardo. Well his family was accustomed to see him angry and non-talking right until he went to see the Ancient One. Then they got back the old Leonardo. And he was taken from them again.

He was aggressive to start with. He would yell at them when they touched him unintentionally. Natalie explained them it was natural after what he went through. He also pulled some punches when he had nightmares. And that was often.

The rare moments he responded them was when Natalie gave him good night hugs. They wondered what was about Natalie's touch that wasn't bothering him.

Most of the days he would just lay in his bed doing nothing. They were all surprised. Because the real Leo wouldn't balk and sulk and pity himself. The real Leo would jump on his feet as soon as he was awake and would state how he didn't hurt, how he was fine and all that stuff they were listening for years. They couldn't recognize him anymore. He looked defeated, and by the sound of his voice it was like he didn't want to live. He scared them a lot, because no one knew how to act around him. So many things happened, and no one had the heart to move on. No one dealt with such a trauma before. This was too much even for three mutant ninja turtles and a rat. And a pregnant human doctor that had leukemia. Pretty sweet, huh? To have no idea how to help your brother, son, friend...

Leo wasn't himself, definitely. It was like he gave up. So not Leonardo-ish.

One day he proved that.

He proved that one day after he thought no one was looking. He entered in the bathroom and closed the door tightly. He didn't see a key, so he figured that everyone could enter in the bathroom. He propped a broom against the door and opened the cupboard where he found that razor blade few days ago. He took it (he had no idea who left it there, since obviously this was Natalie's apartment and she didn't need it. He was too tired to think of why the shell she had one in her bathroom) and took a deep breath. _This is it_ , he said to himself. He was thinking about this since he saw the blade few days ago.

The fact was, Leonardo was raised to live a life where honor was everything. He was raised to believe that after all bad, there is something good that will come. After the rain, it always comes sun. But, what he wasn't told was that when you faced some things, like when he was raped, you cannot expect that everything will go away like it never happened. He hated to think of that one time he was so vulnerable that he wanted to die right there. But, then his mind went to his family and the thought that he failed them by falling in that monster's hands. He failed them, because he wasn't strong enough to fight when he took him, instead he was in a damn hospital suffering from a gunshot wound, and that he didn't remember how he got it. He was a failure. He was horrible son and brother. He saw the disappointment in the eyes of his family. No one said it, but they all felt sorry for him. They didn't know what to say, how to treat him.

" _Be careful not to jostle his ribs…"_

" _Hey Leo, let me help you bro…"_

" _You wanna eat that or you'll just keep staring at it, like it's your worst enemy…"_

" _Leo, please you have too…"_

The words of Raph, Mikey, Don, Splinter, Natalie, the cop that saved their lives, the voices of his friends April and Casey… The sound of their voices, told Leo that they were disappointed. Or maybe he was thinking they were… Who knows? No one could tell.

He wouldn't talk about the time he spent in that warehouse where he was stripped off of anything sane he got inside him. He wouldn't let his family to think of him as a failure. His first thought after he was raped and woke up in that room where he was held was to keep moving, and keep fighting because he had his family out there, and he needed to get back to them.

Now, he wasn't so sure. His thoughts were so messed up that for a moment he lost the grip on the blade.

He took another shaky breath that was accompanied by a pang in his chest. He felt it often enough. Of course he didn't say anything. He didn't want to be pitied anymore. He didn't want to be made a victim. He wanted to die.

Every time he closed his eyes, every _fucking_ time he dreamt of the way he was violated…

He closed his eyes, and he brought the razor close to the wrist on his left hand.

Oh, he was so forthcoming to the darkness that was about to envelop him that he didn't hear the sound of someone trying to open the door, _frantically_.

…

Natalie was in the kitchen making lunch. Raph and Mikey were in the living room playing a video game. Master Splinter was in one of the guest room he claimed his, meditating, again. Donatello… Well, currently Donatello stayed in the kitchen to have some coffee. Right now, all he did was stare into the cup of coffee in front of him.

"Yo Don, what's up?"

"Hm?"

"You look at your coffee for, um, about 20 minutes or so. What's bugging you?"

"Leo." He blurted. Natalie wasn't surprised by his answer.

"Tell me something that I already don't know or can't see Genius."

"Now that you are pulling Raph's nickname, I think you hang out too much with our hotheaded brother."

"Yeah, well he isn't actually saying no to our late night talks so…" Don rolled his eyes and smirked, but she could see it in his look. "What's really bothering you Donnie?"

"What's bothering me Nat is that Leo isn't acting like himself these past few days. I mean not that he is supposed to act like nothing happened, after what he went through, but he is kinda, _distant_."

"I don't understand."

"He's been off before. But not like this. Usually after some pretty much awful time of him giving us his silent treatment, he'll let go of his sorrow. Now, it's like he crawled in his shell, literally and want us as much far from him as he could get. It's like he wants to escape."

"Oh no."

"What Natalie?"

"How did I miss the signs?"

At that moment she ran quickly to the living room where she found Mikey beating Raph in their game.

"Guys where is Leo?"

Last time I saw him, he was looking at the ceiling in his room." Raph answered casually.

"What's up Nat?"

Instead of answering she ran to the passage and found the door slightly ajar. Her heart caught up in her chest. It all made sense now.

Master Splinter entered in the living room and without further delay, he said "Leonardo is in danger."

"But how Master Splinter, he's just restin' in his room-"

"No, he is not!" Natalie said. "And I swear when I'll find him I'll kill him, if he is not already dead."

"What the shell are you talking about?" Mikey asked with teary voice.

"You mean, you mean like he is trying to kill himself?" Donatello asked.

"Yes." She whispered.

"No way will he do that." Said Raphael convinced.

"Donatello said something that makes me think he'll do it Raph."

"But where is he?"

"Bathroom."

She ran to the bathroom and she tugged at the handle. The handle didn't budge. "That son of a…" she muttered under her breath. "He blocked the door. I can't open it."

"Would you mind?" Raph asked.

Natalie gave him his space, and Raph kicked the door open in no time.

…

They saw Leonardo curled on the tiled floor, razor in hand trying to cut his wrist as deep as he could.

She was tempted to slap him on his face, but she knew that at these situations, you should keep a distance. She couldn't risk her life nor the life of her baby.

"How did you know Nat?" Raph asked wide eyed.

"Not time for discussion Raphael. I'll explain everything later." She took a deep breath. "Put the razor down Leonardo." Her voice was stern, and intimidating. "I said put the damn razor down." Even calm.

He did as he was asked. He put the blood covered razor on the tiled floor.

"Don, I have this gauze in that cabinet over there." She pointed to a small door. He did as he was told. "Put it on Leonardo's wrist and take him in his room."

Splinter helped Donatello to get Leo to his room. He didn't say anything to them. Just "sorry."

"Now, are you going to tell me how did you know that he wanted to kill himself?"

"Donatello said something in the kitchen that made me think of Leonardo's behavior these couple of weeks. He is all but the Leonardo you told me about. Then I remembered that in these cases victims of a rape often try to take their own life and in most of the cases it's cutting their wrists. Thomas left that razor one day and he said that he wanted to look good before he went to work if he slept over here." She actually blushed and smiled a little.

Raph and Mikey nodded at her explanation and followed her as she went to Leo's room.

"Would you guys leave me alone for a little while? I want to wrap the wound and talk with Leonardo a little. You can see him later."

"Yeah, sure. I'm not sure what to say to him now." Raph said.

"Me neither." Mikey piped.

Natalie nodded as she entered in the room. Donatello caught her look and he disappeared closing the door tightly behind him. Oh, the party was about to begin. And he was going to miss it.

He didn't want to be Leo right now.

…

"What the HELL were you doing?" Natalie screamed as soon as Don closed the door. "What in this world was so bad that you wanted to kill yourself Leonardo?!"

He didn't have an answer to that question.

She was aware that Splinter stayed behind and that he too watched Leonardo for any reaction, if he had something to say to them after what he did.

"I," he said through silent tears "I failed you all."

"YOU DID WHAT?!" that fueled Natalie's anger even more.

"I failed you, because I let them take me… I let him do some things to me and I didn't have the strength to fight him… I was vulnerable, and I let him use me. I was thinking that you didn't want me after all he did to me…"

"We didn't want you? What the hell is in those medications I give to you? You are sounding like you are high or something." She abruptly pulled his wrist in her hands and she proceeded to clean it. "You are a warrior for fuck's sake!" Natalie yelled. "Sorry Master Splinter." Splinter nodded. Natalie continued to clean the wound on the wrist and tried to stop the blood before bandaging it. "A true warrior never gives up! What happened to you, it wasn't fair, but you have to know that the suicide is not a solution Leonardo! Scream, shout, break everything that's in this apartment, I don't care what you do, but don't you dare do this AGAIN! You are not a failure, and you did not fail us. Do you understand?"

"Yes I do." He said ashamed from his actions.

"Just so you know, we didn't go the hell up to Staten Island to get your ass out of that condemned warehouse, for you to do this to yourself. Let us help you."

Splinter cupped Leonardo's cheeks in his own hands and made his eldest to look him into his eyes. "This is not your end my son." Splinter said never taking his eyes off of Leonardo. "And please do not do this to me or your brothers again. Imagine what would have happened if you actually died? We went through hell to get you back, and now you want to bail on us that quickly. This is not the Leonardo I know. This is not the son I raised."

Leo could see the disappointment in his father's voice. The tears stopped, but his cheeks were still wet and he looked lost. Natalie wished she was the one to kill Jensen and not Raph. He took Leo's love for life and his dignity. She hated that bastard so much she tightened the bandage around Leo's wrist that followed with an "ow" in a pained voice.

"Sorry Leonardo. There, all finished. Now you are okay again." She wasn't even sure in her words, but she was supposed to be strong for Leonardo.

Leo nodded in agreement. Natalie made herself comfortable on the big bed and hugged Leo.

"I will return soon Natalie. You take care of my son." Said Splinter.

Natalie nodded to Master Splinter and listened to Leonardo's even breathing which meant that he finally went to sleep. She was exhausted and she joined him soon.

Two hours later she felt a pat on her shoulder and she woke up to find Raphael looking at her.

"You go and rest in your room like a proper human being that you are." He said. "Your baby needs you now especially that you are in a delicate state. I don't want to risk your life, by Fearless punching you like that the other night when he had a nightmare."

Natalie nodded. Raphael was right. She needed rest as much as they needed it, and she had to admit that she was both pregnant and terminally ill, and she felt more tired than ever.

"Thanks Raph."

"You are welcome Nat. You help me, I help you. Now go, I'll stay with Fearless. He is not going anywhere under my watch. Plus I have few words to say to him about this stupid stunt he pulled."

"Please, go easy on him."

Raphael could see beyond Natalie's current look and saw the sorrow, the anger, the worry, every pent up emotion in her eyes, and he thought about what happened to her, and why she always seemed to understand Leo, even when they couldn't.

"I will Nat, don't worry. I promised remember?"

"I do Raph. Just sayin'."

"Don't worry. I'm not going to beat him up, just talk him out of this crazy ideas of his."

"Good. See ya later Raph."

Raphael nodded and situated himself on the large bed right next to Leonardo. He was aware of all the injuries of his big brother and he didn't want to make him feel uncomfortable, and he knew how wary he was of someone touching him, but he couldn't resist and not hug his brother closer.

Absentmindedly he was drawing circles on Leo's shell to soot him. It was something that Master Splinter always did when they were turtle tots and they had nightmares. He knew that what happened today wasn't good at all, and he was going to give his brother a handful when he felt him stir and soon Leo had his eyes open, wide open, and trying to catch his breath.

"What the…?"

"It's only a nightmare Leo. Only a nightmare."

"Where is Natalie? Where are the others? What…?"

"Try to relax Leo. It's okay. You are here with me and nothing is going to happen. I will protect you."

It was like Raph had some mind control over Leo, because Leo stopped immediately and for Raph's surprise, relaxed against his warm body and let Raph actually touch him. Something that only Natalie could do, without making him mad.

"Leo, we need to talk."

"Yeah, I know. And I know what you are going to say Raph. And you are right. I am an idiot. I know what I did was wrong, but I-"

He was stopped mid-sentence when he sensed Raph's finger over his mouth. "Shhhh Leo, will you let me talk?"

Leo nodded and he knew that Raph was serious. He sat up a little straighter and faced his red clad brother.

"You know, I always said that you were the one turtle that had been doing everything so he could show to us that you were the best. I know that I always called you Fearless. You know my thoughts about how you wielded your swords, how you managed to learn the new moves without much trouble and we would have spent days of learning something you needed only hours, a day tops. You are always in control, your mind, your spirit, your inner strength, your chi. You screamed calmness and support Leo. I want you to go back to those memories. Just go there and pull them back, yank them hard and think of the time when you were on top of your game. I know that I've been an ass, always complaining, calling you names every chance I got when you did something better than me, hell you are the oldest, and we were in constant fights with each other, but I feel like I'm losing you brother. Leo, I know that you may think I tell you this because I want you to get better, but I tell you this because... Ah, it's really simple knucklehead. I love you and I don't want anything bad to happen to you. I want you to be the old Leo, my old stubborn Leo that would give me his piece of mind if I were wrong about something. It's not gonna be an easy process, I get it. But, I'm here. I am here for you. Just like you were there for me, all those times in the past. Maybe you don't realize that Leo, but you've helped me many times in my life that I forgot the count. And you never kept score or called in a favor. Please, let me help you Leo. Reach out to me. Yell at me, kick, scream, and lash out. Just tell me that you are here. Please, talk to me. Your silence is killing me. You always spoke a little, but wise, now even that's gone. I want to know that it's not lost permanently. Leo, please... I need you."

Raphael finished his rant. It was hard for him to say this to Leo, to admit that he needed him despite the fact that he always called on him being better than all of them. Raphael loved his older brother and wanted the best for him.

Leo on the other hand, listened to every word that Raphael said, but hadn't had the strength to reply to his first younger brother. Instead, he just kept staring at the wall afar from his red-banded brother. He hated to admit that Raphael was right, but he wasn't ready.

Raphael finally gave up and started to leave the room, but a choked sob froze him in place. He turned and saw his older brother curled up in a ball, crying helplessly. Poor Leo.

"Hey, Leo... Hey, don't cry. Please, don't. Did I say something that made you cry?"

"No." Leo hiccupped as he replied.

At that moment everything stopped for Raphael. Leonardo replied to him. He spoke.

"Don't look at me like that Raph." Leo said as he hugged Raphael. "Don't look at me like you feel sorry for me. Please."

Raphael closed his eyes and took a deep breath while he was returning the hug to his brother.

"I feel sorry that you had to go through that Leo. I really feel sorry. But what you see in my eyes it is called love kid. Pure brotherly love."

Raphael tightened the grip on Leo as he felt the older turtle shivering in his grasp.

"You okay Leo? You are shivering."

"I'm fine."

Raphael needed few more minutes of cradling Leo and repeating words of reassurance. The shivering finally stopped and Leo managed to control his breathing.

"Why me Raph?"

"What's that Leo?"

"Why did he do this to me?"

The way he asked that question made Raphael's blood to boil inside his veins. He was glad that he finished the bastard for good in those woods.

"Because he had a twisted mind."

Leo didn't say another word. He just snuggled closer to Raph. Raph was fine with that. Until Leo felt comfortable he was fine in this position too.

"Thank you."

"For what Leo?"

"For everything. For being here for me. I understand it's tough for you and the others, and that I am a burden to all of you, but..."

"Listen Leonardo!" Raph didn't call Leonardo by his full name often. For him Leonardo always was either Leo or Fearless. "In no way whatsoever I have thought of you, my brother, as a burden. You are one of the best things that happened to me and I won't tolerate you talking like that for yourself. Do you understand?"

"Yes." Leo whispered.

The loud scream made Donnie and Mikey to get to Leo's room in a heartbeat.

"What's wrong?" Donnie asked.

"What did you do this time Raph?" asked Mikey.

"He didn't do anything." Leo said. "He's been trying to help me... Just like you and Donnie."

"Raph what did you say to Leo?" Donnie got all protective mode.

"I didn't say anything Genius. I just told him that I am here for him and then we talked and he said that he is burden for us and at that point it was just too much."

"Leo..." Donnie sat behind Leonardo on the bed and took one of his hands in his and squeezed it tight. "You are not a burden. You are our brother. We love you. I know that you are overwhelmed with guilt. I know it hurts. I can't imagine what you've been through while you were captured. It was horrible, I am aware of that. But it's not your fault. Please, let us help you."

"Donnie is right Leo." Mikey said from the doorway "We are here for you. We are four brothers that nothing will tear them apart. We have to take care of each other because we only have each other. We love you."

"That's what I've been trying to tell him the whole time." said Raphael.

"Your brothers are right Leo." Natalie spoke from above Leo "You have to let go at some point. And what better way than to let them help you."

Leo looked at the serene form of Natalie looking at him, and the calmness in her voice. The way she said the words sobered Leo and he nodded in understanding.

"Thank you." he said "I've been acting badly a lot lately. I know that you all want to help me, I get that, but I'm not ready to face this. It's just too much. I know you all know what happened. I know that you want me to open up, but I can't. What happened there ... It was something that I want to forget. It hurts to know that my family and friends know how my honor was taken from me, my innocence, and they still have the courage to look me in the eye."

"He tried to break you my son." Splinter joined them in Leo's recovery room "And I can see that he almost succeeded. I saw what you did with the blade today. I know you wanted to die, but there is no solution for the problem if you kill yourself. You have to work it out, don't think that it will go away just because you won't talk about it. I want you to know that you didn't fail us. In fact I am proud of you my son. We are proud, because you survived, because you fought. Not many people can do that. I can't get your innocence, or your honor back, but I believe that my Leonardo, my son, my son that had fought Oroku Saki, that fought true evil is still inside you Leonardo. Don't give up on yourself. We haven't done that yet. And we'll never give up on you my son. Never ever. Everything comes and goes. Comes and goes. Just let us all help you. Because you are screaming "help me", but you are refusing our help. Reach out to your heart Leonardo and let us in."

"Listen Leonardo," Natalie begun. "When you want to die so bad Leonardo, think of the people that are sick and are one step close to the death. The only thing they want is to get well and live. Don't you ever forget that Leonardo!" Raphael swallowed a lump in his throat.

Natalie hugged Leo so tight that she almost choked him. But he stayed in her arms for few minutes before finally letting go of her grasp.

Leo took turns looking at each one of his brothers, his father and Natalie. They were all there waiting for what he'll say, for what he'll do... They waited for a long time and it seemed like Leonardo came back to his senses. But, the worst was yet to come.

How were they going to help him get back to his old self? That was easily said than done.

…

Later that night Natalie came up with a plan of how to get the memories out of Leonardo. Her primary goal was to find out what happened with Leo the night he was shot, but her intent was to let him relax so he can tell them what really happened. She knocked on the door of Master Splinter's room and was surprised to find the rat master opening the door almost immediately, like he was right behind it.

"Something troubles you my daughter?"

"Yes, Sensei." Natalie said. "I was thinking about something for a long time, and what happened to Leonardo proved I'm right. The night when he was shot, I think that it's directly connected to why he was turtle-napped in the first place. Leonardo said something about Jensen asking about that Thursday night, the 25th of June."

"I think you are right Ms. Akita. I have a feeling that all of those things are connected to my son's current situation."

"I figured a way of how to do that."

"How?"

…


	15. Cognitive interview

Chapter 15 - Cognitive interview

* * *

 **Here is the new chapter.**

 **Just to point out something about chapter 14. I couldn't even think of Leo trying to kill himself before this one, but I had to include it in my story because I already had the second part written, and I needed something that will connect those two parts, and I didn't want to be just empty words. Of course, Leo is a strong person that would not do such a thing. But the fact is that everybody is vulnerable and we all have a pressure point when we break and we don't act like ourselves.**

 **In this case, Leo was in a dark place and excluded all of them and didn't want to see the true nature of their words and acts. They were worried about him, he thought they were disappointed in him, and he didn't judge the things like he should, his bad. But I believe that things will get better for him and the others. This won't just go away, and this fic is work in progress, so I hope you'll understand, ideas are popping every second. Thanks for reading and reviewing. I got pretty positive reviews about this story so far.**

… **.**

* * *

 _From Chapter 14_

 _Later that night Natalie came up with a plan of how to get the memories out of Leonardo. Her primary goal was to find out what happened with Leo the night he was shot, but her intent was to let him relax so he can tell them what really happened. She knocked on Master Splinter's room and was surprised to find the rat master opening the door almost immediately, like he was right behind it._

" _Something troubles you my daughter?"_

" _Yes, Sensei." Natalie said. "I was thinking about something for a long time, and what happened to Leonardo proved I'm right. The night when he was shot, I think that it's directly connected to why he was turtle-napped in the first place. Leonardo said something about Jensen asking about that Thursday night, the 25th of June."_

" _I think you are right Ms. Akita. I have a feeling that all of those things are connected to my son's current situation."_

" _I figured a way of how to do that."_

" _How?"_

* * *

…

"There is a technique that can help him recover some of his memories if you agree. It's called cognitive interview."

"What's that?"

"It's a state when a person closes its eyes. Then another person asks the person in question about an event that he/she suppressed in its memory. If we have luck then the memory is still somewhere in Leonardo's brain and we can extract it."

Splinter nodded. "I understand Natalie. You have the permission to do what you think that's best for Leonardo. I just want to see him get better."

"Me too. After today's unpleasant surprise I think it's time we start acting and not until now, thread carefully. He needs to understand that he didn't fail us, and that we love him even after what happened to him. It's not something he should be ashamed of. It happened out of his control."

"I agree my daughter."

"I'm sorry Master Splinter."

"For what?"

"For entering in your lives. You let a complete stranger in your lives and look where it got you. Lucy worked for me. With me. Only if I never met you, Leonardo would've been his normal self."

"Don't feel sorry my daughter. On the contrary. You helped my son while he was shot, you help him now too. Lucy was working for you, indeed. But you had no idea that she was going to betray you. You considered her as a friend and there was nothing that could've prevented her to do what she did."

'But, still, I shouldn't have said anything to her…"

"I think that she already knew."

"What do you mean by that?"

"I was meditating upon this matter after Leonardo was brought home, I mean in your apartment here…"

"This is your home too Master Splinter."

"Thank you Ms. Natalie. Well, I meditated upon that matter, and what you said few minutes ago confirmed my theory."

"Tell me."

"What if Leonardo was purposefully lured to your hospital? I mean, you know, he was shot, and I was thinking… What if he was purposefully shot? Someone knew his routine and followed him. Someone knew that you and Ms. O'Neill were friends and that she would call you first. Someone put Lucy near you. Hun. He must've figured a way how to capture Leonardo, and you know Hun. After Shredder's demise, my sons prevented him in too many deals with the underground. Secret military weapon. I know that Donatello said something about this guy that held Leonardo was an arms dealer, correct?"

"Yes, he was? I get your point. They were luring the brothers, but didn't expect to be Leonardo alone. Or maybe he saw something that he wasn't supposed to see or heard something. He blocked that memory somehow and… You are right Master Splinter. I need to do that cognitive interview as soon as possible. Tomorrow even."

Splinter nodded again.

It's gonna be a long night.

…

It was 5 a.m. Natalie was watching the city of New York from her room's window. The City that Never Sleeps. The Big Apple. She noticed that there was a movement in the house. She knew who it was. There was this distinctive noise this particular turtle made that revealed to Natalie it was Leonardo who was awake so early in the morning. She knew that he couldn't sleep much at night. Nightmares.

Yesterday he did something unbelievable. He tried to take his own life. He tried to give up on his life and all good that surrounded him. But, she was glad that he sobered and he listened to them. He finally reacted to them, and she didn't want to rush him with the cognitive interview, afraid of his reaction. Yet, she wasn't going to let this opportunity go away that easily. That damned night when Leo was shot held some answers to what happened to all of them in the recent weeks and she was determined to bring this thing to the bottom. If that meant to force Leo to open up about what happened, then so be it.

She quietly opened the door from her room and went to the kitchen. There she found the person she was looking for.

"Hey there."

Leo all but jumped. "Natalie. You scared the living hell from me."

"Sorry. I just wanted to take you somewhere, with your permission of course."

"Where are we going?"

"Well since you decided to wake up earlier…" _Like you always do_. "Let's say that I have a surprise for you."

"What surprise?"

"First we are going to eat something."

"Now you lost me."

"Wait until you see it Leonardo. I am sure that you will like it."

Not that she would trust him on a rooftop where he could easily jump, but she trusted him enough to know that he won't try with her by his side.

…

Natalie took the elevator to the last floor of the building together with Leonardo. She knew that even at summer New York's nights could be chilly and that's why she put a large coat over the turtle that currently had his hand tucked inside hers.

"So, what are we doing on a rooftop exactly? Not that I'm starting with training this early?"

Natalie smiled at that and she was surprised at how well Leonardo recovered from yesterday's events. For a moment she thought that it was his way of showing them he was alright before he tried to do something stupid again. But, she figured out after the talk they all had yesterday, this was probably his defense mechanism.

"No Leonardo, no training for a long time. I brought you here, because I want you to see something."

"What?"

"Sit down."

Both of them sat on the roof. Natalie positioned herself in the lotus position. Leo because of his leg tried to stretch himself out.

"Now watch over there and tell me what you see."

There was nothing but darkness out there… But, in few seconds as the sun slowly showed its way behind the skyscrapers, Leo understood what Natalie was trying to tell him.

"It's beautiful…" he said.

"Have you seen a sunrise before Leonardo?"

"Well yeah, many times, but I never actually sat down to watch the actual rising, you know we were always on the run. We went out on patrols at night, came back home before dawn, and I never had the chance to enjoy such a beauty before."

"Then, whenever you feel like it, you can come to my rooftop and watch the sunrise. I know it helped me a lot in the past.

"Are you sure that you won't mind that?"

"Sure."

"Thank you Natalie?"

"For what?"

"For doing all of this for me. I know you don't have to, but you still do."

"It's nothing, really Leonardo. I just want to help you. And I'm glad that you are finally letting me and your family help you. What you should've done first time around."

"Yeah, what I should've…"

"Don't sweat it. It's all forgotten. But only if you promise that you never ever will think again of doing what you were doing in the bathroom yesterday."

"I promise."

"Then we are good."

…

Leonardo was sleeping peacefully, as much as he could in his state after that little morning break by watching the sunset. Natalie recognized exhaustion when she saw it, and she knew that the new experience was exhausting for the teenager that immediately fall back to sleep.

She was kinda happy because of that. But, she was also worried, because exhaustion led to some health problems. She hoped she was wrong.

After he woke up, she took him to her bedroom and she quickly explained what she would do with him. His brothers joined them soon.

"I think I know why you said that you didn't see anything, but in fact you did see something, only what happened next erased your memory. I think that I have just the right way to find out what was that triggered Jensen to hire Hun and the Purple Dragons to kidnap you... And then torture you."

Leonardo looked confused. It was the first time since he was saved that anything made sense. He was feeling like someone had poured a cold water on him and he froze in place when Natalie mentioned the torture and his time being held in Jensen's warehouse on Staten Island. He didn't want to talk about it, although he could see in the eyes of his brothers and father, and even in the eyes of their human friends their need to know what exactly happened. He knew that they were aware of everything that happened to him. Natalie told him about Thomas and his sister and that she went through the same ordeal he did, with the only difference: she was dead. He was ashamed of what happened. That's why he didn't tell anyone not a single detail. He hoped that the others won't ask.

His brothers listened very carefully at what Natalie was going to do next and it seemed like Donatello was the only one that completely understood what she was saying. Master Splinter was resting in the living room while Natalie fussed over Leonardo in the bedroom.

"What are you trying to say Nat?" Raphael asked.

"She is trying to perform a cognitive interview Raph." Donatello said.

"Exactly Don."

"Let me explain it to you Raphael. Cognitive interview is a state where a person helps another person to remember a certain events that he witnessed, but now doesn't have memory of that the event even happened in the first place." Said Donatello. "It's sort of a hypnosis."

Raphael looked like a puzzle.

"From what Leonardo said, I was able to conclude that something bad happened and that Leonardo somehow witnessed it and they wanted him dead all because of what he saw. What they didn't know was that he didn't have recollections of that day. The theory is a little unclear…"

"And why do you think that happened? How? People don't forget such things just like that." Said Raphael.

"That's the point Raph, they do. And Leonardo forgot that particular night. It's erased from his memory, but still there in his brain."

"Now you've lost me, completely."

"Remember when I said that I thought Leonardo had a slight concussion when I first saw him?" Raph nodded. "At first I thought that his dizziness was from the high fever. But after you guys left I ran some tests and it showed that Leonardo indeed suffered minor concussion. At that moment it didn't seem important, because the concussion was fading, but now I strongly believe that it has a great deal to do with what happened to your brother. Something that Leo said yesterday made me think of that night, and that it may all be connected. The night when Leonardo was shot. 25th of June."

All the time while Natalie was talking Leonardo listened, but it was like he wasn't there with them.

"What do you say Leonardo? Can I try and extract the memory that's locked in your brain?"

Leo looked her with his piercing eyes and nodded, unable to speak.

From the four of them that Natalie called them by their nicknames, Leonardo was the only turtle she called by his given name.

"Lie down on the bed and try to relax as much as you can."

Natalie knew that Leonardo was wary when people touched him without his permission, after he was rescued, and she was very aware of the reaction his left fist made with her right cheek one night after she tried to calm him down when he trashed on the bed having a nightmare. And she had the bruise to prove that. Although she knew what happened to him while he was captured, he never said a word about that day.

But subconsciously he was reliving every single second of it. Natalie was scared for him. She was scared that he would make something stupid, possibly even try and take his own life, _again_. And she was determined to prevent that. Even if it meant forcing his memories out of his brain.

"That's right. Relax. Take few deep breaths Leonardo. Okay. That's it. Now I want you to remember the night on 25th of June."

Leonardo let his mind float over his memories of that day.

...

 _It was dark. Maybe it was June but there was a light breeze that sent shivers through Leonardo's spine. He didn't want to go topside today, but he didn't have a choice. He had to take something from April's apartment. He wasn't his usual self and listened only half of the things he was supposed to pick up. He figured April knew what she was supposed to give him._

 _He left April's apartment a little over 10 p.m. He slung the duffel bag with the things that Don apparently needed for his new project, across his shoulder and said goodbye to April._

 _He decided that a little rooftop exercise won't hurt. The weather was mild, it was the right time, but the wrong place._

 _He was closing in on Central Park when suddenly screams filled the air. Leonardo's gut told him to run, but his code of honor told him to see what was happening. What he saw stunned him and his anger came to a boiling degree._

...

Natalie saw Leonardo's muscles tense at the sudden memory.

"What did you see Leonardo?" She asked.

"There was this woman, long blond hair, red dress, black purse and black high heels. She was screaming. There was a man in a grey suit, and Hun, Hun was there too. The man in the grey suit gave Hun a briefcase full of money."

"Okay, what happened after that?"

"The man in the grey suit grabbed her by the waist and forced her to get in the car with him. She clearly didn't want to and he slapped her hard across the face. Blood trickled from her mouth where he hit her. She continued to fight and that's when I became visible. After that her demeanor changed."

"Changed how?"

"Her attitude... It was different. She was like a predator. She had a strange look in her eyes."

"Then they saw you."

"She saw me. When she looked up to the sky she saw me and she started screaming again and pointed towards the roof where I was standing. The man in the grey suit took out a gun, a revolver. He fired at me. I didn't see it coming, but I ducked on the right. However, the bullet grazed me slightly. Then I ran out of there as fast as I could."

"What happened after you ran?"

"I slipped on a tree branch in the park and fell down and I hit my head. Right after that, I came home, I left the bag in Don's lab, and went to sleep. I was exhausted and I almost forgot the wound on my arm. The next thing I remember is waking up in the hospital."

"Did you get a good look on the man in the grey suit?"

"I tried, but... Wait... Oh my God."

"What Leonardo?"

"The man in the grey suit was Jensen." Silence. "That's why I had the feeling that I knew him from somewhere when I first saw him in the warehouse."

"Okay. Leonardo do you know what happened to that woman afterwards?"

"Yes."

"How?"

"She is, was Jensen's wife. She was there, watching, when he..."

Leonardo's eyes snapped open. He was breathing heavily and tried to focus on his whereabouts.

"Leonardo, I think that we've just discovered the reason why Jensen went after you. You saw him and his wife and he thought that you learned about his true identity and his plans with the arms dealing." _I just hope the rest of the theory isn't right_ , Natalie thought.

"I guess that I have to be more careful in the future."

"Yup. Hey Leonardo?"

"Yes?"

"Try and get some rest will ya? This will cause an exhaustion and I don't want ya collapsing. I mean it when I say rest." Natalie looked him in the eye sternly.

"I'll try. You don't have to look at me like that." He said, a weak smile appeared as he winked at Natalie.

"Good. Guys let's get something to eat. Leonardo needs his space right now." She winked back.

"Yes boss." Said Raphael as he led the way.

...

 **-In the kitchen of Natalie's apartment-**

"Okay, that was the weirdest thing I've seen, ever." Raphael said.

"Well, I have some hidden tricks in my sleeve young one."

"I see. You are doctor that's not afraid from four mutant turtles and a mutant rat. You know martial arts, e.g. you know the art of Ninjitsu. You are a skilled fighter all right, you handled my Sais as a pro, you work well with Leo's katana, and you know how to fire a gun that's for sure. You know a lot about psychology and some mumbo jumbo stuff only Braniac could understand. Tell me if I missed something."

"I think that you summed up everything perfectly. And to tell you that I was waiting you to say this…"

"Oh, you see I forgot something. I forgot that you know how to read minds. I bet that you did that all the time in school and in college."

"You bet I did."

"And don't forget that she is a great judge of character dude." Mikey chimed in. "And she knows how to cook, alright. I can still taste her lasagna man."

"I'm glad you like my cooking Mikey. I like your dishes too. You are an experienced cook. Actually, now that you said it, I could use some help with dinner tonight. I want to cook something for Leo."

"That's okay by me." Mikey said. "Leo is the easiest from all four to cook for you know?"

"I think that I might've heard something a little birdie told me few days ago."

They continued to chat about everyday stuff. Natalie put a tea pot to boil on the stove, while she prepared the cups for each and every one of them. Even Raphael agreed to have some tea. That was quite a change. Master Splinter came into the kitchen when he smelled the rich scent of the Japanese herbal tea Natalie prepared.

"How are you my sons?" he asked while he sat in a chair.

"Fine Master Splinter." Don answered.

"And you Ms. Akita… Natalie?" Splinter furrowed his brow in the process, making Natalie chuckle at his antics.

"I'm feeling great today Master Splinter." And she was, indeed.

"Did you have a chance to talk to Leonardo about what you told me last night?"

"Yes."

"And?"

"And, I think we were right. Both of us. Every piece fits the puzzle." Natalie recapped the cognitive interview she performed on Leonardo and its outcome. She told Master Splinter about everything that happened to Leonardo that night and what he witnessed. He couldn't help, but notice that his son with the purple mask looked at his cup of green tea like it held an answer to all of his problems.

"Something troubles you Donatello?"

"Nothing Sensei."

"You are thinking of what happened to Leonardo is your fault, right my son?"

Don nodded.

"It's not your fault my son." Splinter said. "It could've easily be you, or Raphael, or Michelangelo on Leonardo's place. It was faith. It was something that was supposed to happen and nothing could've prevented it from happening. It's not your fault."

"I wish it could be so easy to just forget about it Master Splinter, but I can't. It's just… what happened to Leo, it wasn't fair. And I am the responsible for that. If I just waited for a couple of more hours, and told him to pick the tools up later…"

"It's not your fault Donnie." All of them turned to see the subject of their conversation stand by the door of the kitchen.

"I see that he is not following orders Master Splinter. Although I've been told otherwise." Natalie said.

"Yeah, well he is stubborn sometimes."

Leonardo ignored their words and walked slowly with the help of the crutch to the nearest empty chair and slumped in it.

"I couldn't lie in the bed anymore Nat. I can't just sit still and do nothing. I'll go stir crazy."

"I guess that I can relate to that. You have some book you can read or some DVD you can watch? Something to do besides lying in bed for the whole day?"

"Maybe? I really love the movie "The Three Musketeers". The 1993 version anyway." It was a movie that he saw few years prior, due to Mikey begging him to watch it. After that it became one of his favorites.

"Then we can watch it if you like? Just a suggestion. And I really like the movie. Athos is real funny."

"Yes, he is."

"I think that it would be a great idea son." Said Splinter. "You can rest, relax and have some time for yourself. What do you say?"

Leo looked at his father and Natalie awaiting an answer. He sighed. "Okay, you convinced me. Lead the way Nat."

"I'll make you some popcorn."

"Thank you Mike." Natalie said. "And don't burn the dinner." She said with a smirk.

…

As soon as Natalie and Leonardo left the kitchen the other four inside continued their talk.

"Guys we need to find that woman. She is the only one that saw Leo and knows what happened. If we see this from this angle, she is the one that started it in the first place, and we need to make sure she leaves New York." Said Raph. _Or possibly this world_ , he thought.

"Yes indeed." Said Donatello.

"But how?" asked Mikey. "We don't know anything about her, or if she was the mastermind behind the plan."

"Let me deal with that." Natalie sounded from the door while she whispered. "Your only concern is that of making sure that Leonardo is safe. I'll talk to Thomas and see what I can do. That woman shouldn't come near Leonardo again. If what Leonardo said it's true than she is dangerous as much as Jensen. Maybe more. He is in danger while she is still out there. We are in danger as well."

"Natalie is right my sons."

All three of them nodded.

And then she yelled for Leonardo to listen to her and not suspect a thing. "Mikey, where is that popcorn? We are starving here!"

…

The film ended and Natalie left Leo in the living room while she went to help Mikey prepare the rest of the dinner. Master Splinter decided to help them in the kitchen and to set the table, while Raph and Donnie went to the living room to stay with Leo. It was awkward to sit with Leo and talk about nothing in particular with their brother. He wasn't very talkative before either, but now the silence was screaming at them. Raph would never admit, but he missed Leo's strong voice yelling at him. He missed the old Leo. But, he didn't know what he should do with his brother. He tried everything. He even talked to him yesterday. And Leo responded. But, with the new day already here, he was out of thought of what he should say to Leo that he didn't say already.

It was Donatello who spoke his thoughts. "You know Leo, it's not your fault." Donnie started. "I know that you probably thought of what happened that night when you were shot a thousand times already, but it's not your fault. And think of it as a past time. Don't let it overwhelm you."

"You know when I think better of it Donnie, it was indeed his fault." Said Raph that let his anger manage him. He was thinking about what he heard happened that night and all he could see was red. He was angry at Leo, at that bloody woman, at the world. But mostly Leo because he was careless. The Fearless leader got careless for one moment and that moment proved to be deciding in their lives. He hated to see Leonardo this defeated.

"You had to go "the helper mode" when the people actually didn't have the need of you, Leo!" Raph yelled now. "You had to peer, you had to see, and you had to react to those screams. Look what it did to you bro. Look at yourself."

Donnie didn't like where this was going. "Raph, please stop." he said. "It wasn't Leo's fault."

"Oh Don, IT WAS his fault. Do you know why? Because he is always the self-righteous turtle and he always has to go with his nature. It happened the same with the Shredder. He was done. Shredder started the war. Our Fearless leader tried to stop that war by himself. But, we came along the way and helped him in his quest. We decided to kill ourselves on that ship together. And what did he do after we were saved miraculously? Instead of saying thanks to God that saved our shells, he blamed himself for the decision we made TOGETHER, AS A TEAM! AS BROTHERS! And what good it did? Nothing! Our father suffered a blow to the head and a cut on his forehead because his eldest son decided that he had enough ninja training and attacked him while they sparred! Why was that? Because he felt guilty and he was done listening to our pleas and begging to let us in, and tell us his worries. He is always the one that says when we are in need to ask him for help. He on the other hand doesn't want help either. We cannot fucking talk like normal people, since we got him back. He isn't saying a word, and what we are supposed to do Don? He tried to TAKE HIS OWN FUCKING LIFE JUST YESTERDAY DON? Did you forget that already? He is guilty for being reckless. She screamed, so what? You could easily see from a mile away that those were bad guys. I understand perfectly that she was maybe kidnapped by them, but the moment she screamed the second time, revealing him after he told her to be quiet should've sealed the deal."

"HE HAD NO POSSIBLE WAY OF KNOWING THAT HE WOULD END UP GETTING SHOT RAPHAEL!" Donatello screamed now. He was the one turtle that lost his temper almost never, but right now, he was blowing steam through his nose while he yelled at his second older brother. "You think it was easy for him getting shot and almost dying because of it? Because of it, HE WAS TORTURED! Shell, he almost died then too. Stop blaming all on Leo for once. His only fault is for being the kind turtle he is, always helping someone. If someone is to blame then that's me. I was the one that sent him to go to April's that night. I was the one that put him in that situation. It is I who is guilty of that, not Leo." Donatello ended with a whisper.

"You know, I'm here." Leo said. "Please don't argue because of me. I'm not worth the while."

That was it. Don lost his temper and charged his eldest brother with such a force that Leo fell hard on his shell, his crutch flying to the other end of the living room and biting the inside of his cheek so hard, he tasted blood. Pain was flaring through his whole body. Blood poured from his nose and while he tried to stop the bleeding, he looked in disbelief at his smart brother. Tears had welled in his eyes, and he almost shed them when his father, Natalie, and Michelangelo entered in the living room, startled from the sound of a fight. Natalie immediately helped Leo to get up and sat him on the couch. She took the first aid kit and stopped the bleeding in a flash. She gave Leo back his crutch and helped him get in his room. There, she asked him what happened between him and his brothers. Instead of answering her, he cried.

Natalie saw the pent up emotions in his eyes, and she was glad that he finally released them. She enveloped him in a tight embrace. The heart wrenching sobs racked his body while Natalie held him firmly in her gentle and loving arms. It was horrible what happened to him, and now the fight with his brothers. _Leonardo's healing will be long_ , she thought as she felt the hot tears staining her shirt. For what seemed like hours he stood in her embrace, saying nothing, panting. He shed silent tears from time to time, and hiccupped few times. But, he was awkwardly silent. She was more than satisfied that he finally reached out to her that she didn't need any words from him right now.

"I don't want them to see me crying Natalie." he suddenly croaked. "I don't want them to see me crying. I have to be strong. For them. And for me. I just don't know if I can. I am broken and I don't know if I can be repaired."

"You are one of the most noble creatures I know Leonardo. The strongest too. And you will overcome this period in your life believe me. You will be repaired. I will help you." She squeezed him reassuringly on the shoulder.

"Please call me Leo, Nat. Leonardo makes me feel so formal. And besides only Master Splinter calls me like that. And you obviously aren't Master Splinter."

Natalie chuckled at the turtle's antics. Even Leonardo had a sense of humor at some point. And for the first time since she met him, she felt like she was having the kid he was in front of her. He was a teenager, a 17 year old that had the mind of a 30 year old, just because he was forced to grow up earlier. She vowed to help him get his bearings and care for him while she was alive. And prepare him for what was to come in a few months. She hugged his fragile body closer. Leonardo let the warmth from Natalie's body to take him into custody and he soon found himself dreaming. Natalie tucked Leonardo in his bed and left his room, closing the door of the room so silently, like a ninja. And then she marched into the living room where the whole clan Hamato sat like they were sitting on nails. She eyed Donatello and Raphael before she spoke "And what the shell got into you two?"

"Nothing. Donnie here tried to apologize to Leo, to say that it wasn't his fault that he got shot and stuff, and…"

"… and Raph kinda lost it after that." Donatello finished.

"You realize what you both did right? You fought with your brother instead of talking to him like normal person. Donatello you with your fists, Raphael you with your words. I thought you guys were smarter than this."

"But, I-"

"Shut up and listen to me very carefully Raph." Natalie said. "Last night I and Master Splinter had a talk where I explained him what I was going to do with Leonardo and extracting his memory. With today's knowledge I'm almost certain that you were really targeted. It could've been anyone, not just Leonardo. They could've taken Master Splinter, April, Casey, every person that was in contact with you. You told me that you and the Purple Dragons go way back and that you tried to stop their robberies and them stealing military grade weapons after the Shredder's gone from the scene."

Raph nodded.

"Well then how about you connect the dots a little and start controlling that temper of yours? Just yesterday you poured your heart to Leo and now you are yelling at him, accusing him… How dare you Raph?"

"I…" He opened and closed his mouth again. "I guess you are right."

"Yes I am. And what I'm trying to say this whole time is that Travis Jensen was a known arms dealer that went under the alias of Mr. Grey."

"Must have been the suits." Mikey said.

Natalie actually smiled at that. "You got all figured out Mikey huh?"

"All to the last detail."

"I think that I understand where this is going Nat." Raph said.

"Well, lucky for you, but I have to say it out loud anyway. Travis Jensen and Hun, somehow planned a trap for you all. It was Leonardo that was caught in the trap and took the fall, but we all did with him. I say all because I was somehow their target too, through my personal assistant Lucy."

"Are you trying to tell me that it could've been any of us out there that night witnessing the exchange between Hun and Jensen, and they would've done it the same?"

"Correct?"

"I thought that Leo saw something that triggered Jensen to hunt him down afterwards." Raph said surprised.

"I thought of that too the first time I was trying to understand what exactly was going on with our lives and where did us do wrong. Lucy works for me. Someone knows that, like Hun who put Lucy in the hospital in the first place. Someone knows that April and I are friends and that if some of you is hurt, let's say deadly, that no one could save their injuries without any medical knowledge and supplies. If that someone knows that with an average paycheck April O'Neill and Casey Jones will draw attention to themselves for larger purchases of painkillers without prescription and medical supplies in larger amounts, then that someone also knows that April has a friend doctor that she may call in an emergency. They were counting on that."

"So they staged that meeting there, to look like Leo was witnessing a major arms deal and that he saw something that he didn't actually saw… This looks more like a movie scenario."

"Life is a movie Raph. And we better start planning what we are going to do next because we need to be one move ahead of our opponent. If that woman is still in NYC, she'll seek revenge for her husband and she'll come after us. We have to be prepared."

…

While everyone thought that they left Leonardo sleeping tight in his room, he _accidentally_ overheard their conversation.

Everything made sense now. But he didn't understand why Jensen asked him about what he saw, what he heard, and what he witnessed that night when he was shot? And why the woman screamed when she saw him? And why she watched Jensen rape him with such a pleasure? And why she had those predatory eyes?

 _What in the world is going on?_


	16. Welcome to the first day of your life

Chapter 16 - Welcome to the first day of your life

* * *

 **Hooray! This is one of the longest chapters I've ever written here on the site, and the second longest in this story. Wow, more than 11000 words.**

 **Anyway, what I wanted to say is that there are few references that are things from my real life I inserted in the story. Like the thing Natalie's friend told her "You have to be guided by the thought that everything will be better one day. You'll get through this." It's a thing a friend of mine told me once. And the reference that crying isn't a weakness, is what I "preach" almost always when crying is mentioned.**

 **The song belongs to the respective owner (s).**

 **The chapter is too long I know, longer than what I write normally, but I didn't have the heart to divide it into two or possibly three parts.**

 **Also it will be a while before I update this or another story, because I'm again busy with exams I have to take now (failed the regular) and then the semester starts and so on…**

 **Enjoy this chapter.**

 **P. S. If someone recognizes the verse of a song by one of my favorite bands I used in the title of this chapter I give him/her a virtual piece of cake :)**

* * *

…

 **3 months later**

 **Early November 2006**

She heard a soft knock on the window of her bedroom.

She was pulled out of her thoughts. When she turned around she saw him standing there, glowing in the night light. She became accustomed to him coming to her apartment every now and then, with his family following suit the next morning. She enjoyed their company too. Especially when her cop boyfriend had loads of paperwork and undercover assignments kept him busy and all they could do was share his lunch break.

Leonardo entered in her bedroom as soon as she opened the window. He enveloped her in a tight embrace.

"Didn't know you missed me this much."

"No… well yes. I was just thinking about something. Coming here, on the rooftop, gives me peace… Don't know why, but it helps me just stare in the city before it is fully awake."

Natalie nodded as she recognized the reason behind these night visits she received often enough since she stopped Leo from killing himself. She smiled at him. It was a sad smile.

"Are you for a-?"

But, she didn't finish her sentence. Leonardo enveloped her in a tight embrace. She returned the hug and tightened the grip on his shell.

"Please hold me Natalie. Don't let me fall down. If I fall down, then they all fall down. I need to stay on top of my game so they won't break. So that I won't break."

"And how exactly are you going to do this Leonardo?"

"I'll work out. I'll practice. I need to be their guide Natalie and I need to be prepared for everything and anything."

"Not before you heal completely."

"But..."

"No buts Leonardo. Do you want to die and leave your brothers alone? Just think about it. You push yourself too much. Relax and take it easy. You will succeed I know, but you cannot do that if you keep pushing your limits off the chart. If you want to go on with your crazy plan so be it, but tell Don not to call me if your state gets worse."

With that Natalie left Leonardo lying in her bed and went into the living room of her apartment.

The turtle (s) lived with her on and off for a while now since they rescued Leonardo and she started liking their company. She felt safe after all that time she spent alone before. She never feared for someone else's lives as she feared for those creatures, those mutant turtles with three fingers, and two toes, giant shells, wearing masks and practicing martial arts. They grew on her and there was nothing she could do to prevent her heart in developing a special bond with them all.

The bond of family.

A family she once lost. In the hands of Oroku Saki.

She sensed a presence behind her back and when she turned around she found a half asleep Leonardo looking at her with those giant puppy eyes of his, with a sad, distant look. He was having nightmares almost every time he closed his eyes.

"Nightmare?"

"Mhm."

"You know what help me when I have nightmares?"

Leo shook his head no.

"Hot chocolate. Wanna one?"

"Yes."

Natalie made the hot chocolate and gave Leo a cup. She observed how he let the hot drink steam and him savoring every sip till there wasn't any left of the liquid in the cup.

"Come here Leo. Let's get you to bed."

It was like she was talking to her kid, the one that died couple of years ago. She felt responsible for Leonardo. She knew he was a big guy, the leader of his team, but right now he was in a fragile state of mind and if Natalie could do anything then she chose to stay at his side no matter what. She led him to her bedroom. She wrapped a blanket around him, because she noticed he shivered slightly.

She was told by his brothers that Leo was the first to feel the cold weather, and although the cold weather was a trademark for New York City in fall and winter, and you'd think everyone was accustomed to it, it was still visible that some people felt it more than others.

Instinctively she pulled Leonardo closer to her. She knew that her body heat can warm him up. After a while he relaxed in her embrace and she heard the change of his breathing.

"You want me to stay with you tonight?"

Leonardo seemed to consider the offer for a few seconds before he spoke up. "Yes. I'd appreciate that." Leonardo said.

"Easy Leo, that's right, lean onto me."

Leo adjusted himself as Natalie wrapped her arms around him, hugging him tightly like she was holding on a life line.

Long after Leonardo thought she was asleep, she could feel his tears staining her pajama top. Leonardo was crying. What for she didn't knew, but it wasn't important. Right now the important thing was that she was there for him answering his silent secretive pleas.

He was wary of their questions about his torture in the hands of the Purple Dragons and Jensen. She knew that Leonardo experienced something that made him question his actions. She refused to name that something. But she also knew something about showing your emotions.

Crying doesn't make you weak. Crying makes you stronger. It means that you have heart, soul, feelings that every once in a while get ripped off of their shells (both figuratively and really) and get hurt. By crying you are able to repair them, to heal your wounds, to rise from the ashes like the Phoenix. It means to be able to move on. It meant that everything will be better one day. A friend once told Natalie "You have to be guided by the thought that everything will be better one day. You'll get through this."

She wanted so much to scream, but was afraid she will wake Leo up.

…

The next morning when Natalie woke up Leonardo was gone.

She frantically called Donnie that confirmed her fears. Leo wasn't home either. Then it clicked to her and she called Donnie back.

"Hey Nat, you found him?"

"No, but I have an idea where he is. Until I call you, don't tell your brothers and father. Don't want to worry them."

"Fine." Donnie replied. "Call me when you find him."

Natalie climbed up to the roof of the building. Her doubts proved to be once again true. Her instinct still served her well.

"How'd you know I was here?" Leo said, as he looked at the sunrise, not moving.

"Well, I thought of that one time when we were here watching the sunrise together, and I remembered how much you liked the sight, and how you told me that you have never seen a sight this beautiful before, because when you and your brothers got out of the sewers it was already night and you had to come back before sunrise, so you never actually enjoyed a moment like that. Although you did see sunrises before. But nothing like the one we saw together. Plus this is your new favorite rooftop."

"Yep, that's true." Leo said. "You have the memory of an elephant Nat. You never forget."

"Never. Listen Leo, um I wanted to say something last night, but you went to sleep before I had the chance to. So… It is okay to be afraid. And it's okay to have those horrible nightmares. What happened to you won't go away so easily, and if the sunrise is of any help, or if you want to come here, you can do it, whenever you feel like it, just like I said that one time. Although I suspected that you spent almost every morning on this very rooftop watching the sunrise." Leo quirked hid eyebrow in a questioning move. "It's a ninja thing." Natalie replied. "Besides, I told Master Splinter long ago. This is your home too. And you are like my little brother that I can take care of." She said. "So this is your roof and your building, and your apartment, as long as you are comfortable with it. My lil bro."

"I like the sound of it Nat." Leo said. "In my whole life I've always been the big brother. Always. It's nice to be called "little brother" instead."

"I like the sound of that too. Well, how about I go and prepare a breakfast and you enjoy your sunrise a little longer?" Natalie asked him, slowly fishing the phone out of her pocket to call Don.

Leo nodded and returned to the sun that was slowly rising and waking NYC up. He took a deep breath savoring the morning air mixed with the golden glow of the sun behind the tall buildings before he turned around and abandoned the roof. He entered in the kitchen where he saw Natalie placing glasses on the table next to the plates full of pancakes and eggs with bacon.

"I see someone has been very hungry this morning."

"Yes, I haven't eaten since last night. And I feel like I might eat a whole lion."

"I see that the baby is asking too much from you."

"Yes, it does." Natalie placed her hand on her belly. The belly started to grow, now at its four months.

"So, how is it going with Tom, Nat?"

"Great. We've been out on a dinner the other night, and he wants us to take a little late fall break and go to LA, to tell my father about our relationship and about the baby. He's been pretty excited."

"I can see that. So what did you say?"

"Well, not that I've abandoned my job permanently, I think that I will manage to squeeze in a week or two. But there is…" The fact was that she didn't want to face her father and tell him that she was deadly ill. And she kept it a secret from the boys that she reduced her shifts in the hospital pulling some days off and vacation days she had from previous years, before she quit completely.

"What? Is there something wrong with you or with the trip?"

"There are so many things going on around here Leonardo, I don't know where to start."

"If it's about me Nat, I know how to take care of myself. Besides, I have three annoying brothers and an overprotective father that can take care of me if I can't do that for myself. I think you had a chance to meet them already." Leo winked as he sipped from his orange juice.

"Well, yes, you are part of the reason, but there is something else going on… I don't know how to tell you this, but-"she was cut mid-sentence when the doorbell rang. "I better open the door."

…

"Oh it's you guys. Good morning April." they hugged. "Casey." She bumped fists with the vigilante. "What are you guys doing here?"

"Well we were just passing by your apartment on our way to work, and we thought that we should pay you a visit and have a nice and descent breakfast."

"Yummy yummy bear claws. Ape you are the best."

"I know, I know. That's why I always bought an extra pack in school. I knew how much you loved them, and I just had to indulge you."

"You are such a sweetie."

"I know that too. Oh, Leo is here too." The pink haired woman noticed the sword wielding turtle at the table eating his eggs and bacon and currently sipping from the orange juice. "And I see that you already started breakfast…"

"Yeah, well he came here to…"

"I wanted to see the sunrise. It's so nice from this rooftop. Good morning."

"Good morning to you too Leo." April said. Leo left the table as he ate the last bite of his breakfast. She tried to approach him easily as to not startle him. He spread his arms and the woman flew in a tight embrace. She couldn't stop few stray tears.

"So, what do you say we call the guys and Tom if he's not already in the station?" Casey asked.

"Someone called my name?" Thomas asked as he planted a kiss on Natalie's lips and hugged her sideways. "Oh, I see that someone kept you company while I was gone."

"Yes, he did."

Leo smiled sheepishly as he let the moment flow over him. He was still bugged by Natalie's last words before the doorbell rang, but right now he decided that he would enjoy the rare moment.

At that moment Don's voice brought him to the present. "I see you started the party without us."

"Don't be mad Donnie-boy." Mikey piped cheerfully. "I think there is plenty of food in Natalie's fridge and she needs some help with it. Ow!"

"That's not the way I taught you Michelangelo." Splinter said as he smacked the youngest on the head.

"I don't have nothing against you helping me with food Mikey. Both with preparing and eating it." Natalie said. "Now, shall we savor those goodies April brought?"

"You up for your second breakfast Nat?" Leo said as he occupied the chair next to Natalie.

"I'm not the only one." She replied. That made everyone laugh.

Everyone took their place at the table. They enjoyed the breakfast together as a family, laughing and joking.

…

 **Later that afternoon**

Natalie knew that she started something this morning while she and Leo shared a private moment and it was time that she told them all the truth about her and her health. But the conversation took another course as she tried to reason with Leonardo that he needed to take it easy and not push himself too much. He was still prohibited to train and to mention the word "dojo". He went stir crazy. But whenever he took a sharp breath or move suddenly, he'll feel a pain in his chest. He still favored his broken leg. Sometimes his left arm would hurt if he tried to stretch his arm too much. And he definitely couldn't do any kata without his arms and legs involved in the process, and he already experienced the pain of his lower body once when he _accidentally_ tried to train, albeit not allowed to do so. To say that Natalie was pissed, it was an understatement.

The pain in his chest made him think her reasoning was right and that she never spoke something if she never meant it. That also made him to listen to her orders. He knew that if his family members saw him struggle during their sparring sessions or when practicing some katas, they would either pester him for a month for that or would try and teach him a lesson of how you should not hide your pain from yourself first and then from your family. Something he was accustomed to hear almost always when he was hurt and he refused to say how much pain he felt.

There was something else considering his health that he disclosed form his family and that was that he felt tired. More tired than usual with him getting up earlier than anyone. He didn't listen what Natalie was saying.

"Sorry Nat I wasn't paying attention, can you repeat the question again."

She smiled at him. The usually focused Leonardo was easily losing focus in the months that followed his recovery. "I said, you could've easily escaped after we found you that first time in the warehouse Leo. Why didn't you?" Natalie asked him, after they finally had some time just for themselves. She knew that he wouldn't talk about his ordeal in front of his brothers, and she had somehow to convince him to talk about it.

"Because while you fought with his men, Rojas came right behind me, and caught me by the arm, the injured one, and then… Jensen came right behind me and put one of his filthy hands over my right shoulder and turned me in the direction as to face me directly. He said that with one call he'll kill you. I couldn't let that happen. I couldn't let that man kill you and my family. After all you've been through to save me, I couldn't let him do something to you. I can't stand to see the others suffering. I've seen them in some of their worst moments, and believe me, they are really sensitive beings."

"And you are not?" she asked him.

"What do you mean by that?"

"You are as sensitive as they are Leonardo. You deserve to have some time to yourself, some peace for yourself. You cannot always sacrifice you for the sake of your brothers. If he wanted to kill us, he would've done it the moment we entered in his warehouse. We triggered the silent alarms without knowing. Donnie told me that after we entered in the building."

"What are you trying to say?"

"I'm saying that Jensen played on the family card so he could get a hold on you once again. He felt that you were slipping through the tight grip he had on you the moment we entered in that warehouse. In some twisted way you were special to him. Or maybe he wanted to do something else with you, but we interrupted his plans and he decided that it was the best if he eliminated you once and for all, right there, and right then. He couldn't afford witness to be left alive. "

Leonardo hated to admit, but Natalie's words were true. What she was saying was true to its form, and she also had a great insight on all of them, except for her assistant, whom she trusted and then she betrayed her. But, he also remembered Jensen's wife. He knew that his family and his friends tried to find her before she found them. So far no one would tell him what exactly their plan was or how they were going to find her in city this big.

"It's not your fault Nat."

"What?" Now Leonardo's voice took Natalie out of her own world of thoughts.

"It's not your fault that I've been taken. You couldn't have possibly known that Lucy was going to tell Hun that I was there, nor that she actually knew him."

Natalie bit back the theory she and Splinter came to, not knowing that the turtle that sat across her already knew about it.

"I can't help it Leonardo. I can't help it, but think that it was me who pushed you in her arms and she took you away from me and your brothers. You suffered a lot because of it. It was supposed to be a simple recovery from a gunshot wound. It turned out to be the fight for yours… and our lives."

"Well, there is nothing simple in being a teenage mutant ninja turtle Nat." Leo said, with a sad smile. "I want you to know that I don't blame you for what happened. You and I were working on our friendship before I was taken, and I want us to continue and be good friends. Nothing has changed that."

Sincerity was evident in Leonardo's eyes, as he looked at his damaged leg that was in a cast till recently, and the brace around his plastron and shell that held his ribs in place (for precaution).

"You okay?" Natalie asked looking at the tortured body of her friend.

"Yep, I'm fine." Leonardo felt a sharp pain in his chest that came in waves today.

"I know that you are not fine, so cut the crap. It's time for you to finally admit that you hurt Leonardo. It's not time to be strong in front of me, when I know you feel awful."

"You are stubborn"

"Not more than you."

Leonardo sighed. "Ahhhh, okay. I felt a sharp pain in my chest. It's probably nothing and we are worrying over something that's not even important."

"Not important? Are you listening to yourself Leonardo? You are saying that it's nothing. A chest pain is nothing to you? Do you know what happened to you? Electroshocks happened. You are unbelievable."

"Please don't yell at me." He said with a voice that seemed defeated.

She regretted her yelling the moment she saw him tense. "Sorry Leo. But, I'm so worried about you and what you are going through and I'm pissed off that you think it's nothing. You were hurt God dammit. You need to tell me what's wrong with you so I can try and fix the problem if it's in my powers. You are my responsibility now. If you try and pull the 'failing card' once again, or the 'I'm not hurt card' there would be consequences."

"I understand. And I'm sorry once again."

Natalie told him to lie down as she tried to make him an EKG and then she measured his blood pressure and pulse.

"You tired lately?"

Leo nodded. The EKG showed a little irregularity in the work of the heart, it skipped a normal rate, and then at one moment it took longer to continue with the normal pace.

"You have trouble breathing Leo?"

"Well not exactly. Sometimes my breath hitches, but that happens almost always so I don't know if you could define it as a part of the problem with the pain in my chest."

Natalie nodded as she continued working with her machines while Leo stayed perfectly calm. Or so he was convinced.

"What is it?" Leo asked, frightened for the outcome.

"It's nothing. I mean, your heart shows a little irregularity in its beats, it skips a beat every few seconds. I think that I might have the solution for that, although I think that it's better if you hear me out. I know that this might be hard for you, but in order to solve this problem we have to go at its core. First, I want you to promise me that until you are fully healed you will stay out of the dojo, no physical activities that may get you down, are we clear?"

Leo nodded. _Like I was allowed till now…_

"You will start some exercises and you will be very careful with everything you do. Whatever you do, it has to be done with use of normal strength. If you have to lift a cardboard box that's empty, you'll do that with minimum pressure, are we clear?"

Leo nodded again. His face was a mask of pain and anguish. His mind registered everything that Natalie said, but what she was saying was equal to Leonardo's suicide. Poor choice of words. She was saying that he shouldn't train, that he needed to exercise for his heart, and not to help his brothers. Just stay put in one place, and listen to their orders and everything they asked him. Nothing out of the ordinary was supposed to happen. What was this heart problem all of a sudden? He was the leader. He couldn't allow himself to rest.

"I know what you are thinking Leonardo. But, I promise you that after a while you'll heal. Not completely, but we can manage to reduce the pain in your chest and you going back to your normal activities. That means normal activities, not overreacting with your training sessions. And if there is any change of your breathing, if you feel more pain, if you feel anything that can turn out to be a problem, then you will contact me immediately. Leonardo."

Leo nodded unable to speak. He just stared way beyond Natalie, and the wall, and the whole apartment. His thoughts traveled to some happy times, when they were careless turtles living in the sewers.

"Come here big ninja boy." Natalie opened up her arms that enveloped Leonardo's shell. It was a little weird with the growing belly of Natalie's.

Leonardo returned the hug and was grateful because Natalie was here for him. He squeezed her tightly and breathed in her scent to know that she was real and he wasn't imagining that he gained a friend in the doctor he once didn't trust. He felt like something kicked in his plastron and he immediately broke the embrace.

"What happened?"

"I think that the little one kicked in. I felt it on my plastron."

"He or she will be a fighter I guess."

"Since before he or she is born." Leo smiled. "And I think we agreed on 'Leo' didn't we?"

"I'm so sorry Mr. Hamato, I didn't know it bothered you to be called by your first name."

Leonardo laughed for the first time in a long time and it was so good to listen to that tone of his voice that Natalie swallowed a lump in her throat.

How was she supposed to break the bad news to the turtle that started feeling better again after all the hell he went through?

She felt that the answer would come all too soon.

…

Natalie started to have sessions with Leonardo to control his breathing. Not that he didn't know how to do that, but she wanted to try out something new that she thought it would work with him. Through meditation and breathing control she wanted to make Leo open up about what happened to him. She came down only to the part after he was captured by Hun and the Purple Dragons and experienced waterboarding. Like she thought in the first place when she saw the barrel the first time.

She also realized that their private sessions where both of them could say whatever they wanted and discuss the matter without actually telling someone what they were talking about actually relieved their stress. Something like writing down your tasks for school and trying to solve them one by one.

…

 **A week later**

It was time for one of their sessions. Leo felt pretty relaxed by now and started talking about how it would be awesome if all of them went to the farmhouse that was once property of Casey's grandma. He was talking about how he enjoyed his stay there and that in many occasions that place helped him heal both physically and emotionally.

He was still wary from people touching him, but throughout these sessions, and Natalie's words of encouragement, he finally let his family around him. He tried to be more normal around them and not freak out when Mikey would yell after he beat Raph in a game, or when he heard Donnie yell at Mikey for ruining another experiment for his.

He realized the meaning of Natalie's words about the fact that he was sensitive too, and that he should think of himself more often, than to bury him with worries over his brothers and father, about his family, if he was a good brother or son, if he failed them… He was about to go with the flow and see where the path would lead him in his life.

Strangely, no one mentioned _how_ they found him after Jensen decided that he should die. He had some pretty awful nightmares about that night, when he was pushed into the 6 feet hole in the ground and buried alive while he struggled for air. He didn't mention to Natalie the fear he felt when they rode the lift of the building. Like the world was closing on him and even he knew he had Natalie with him, he was scared. That's why he held her by her hand.

He often woke up in bed, sweating and breathing heavily.

Then Raph would come to his room and will practice the exercise together with Leo and help him even his breathing. He wouldn't ask what the nightmare was about. Instead he would just tell him that everything will be okay one day and that he should try and relax.

He was surprised by Raph. He knew that his immediate younger brother was a big softie on the inside and that he was probably the most emotional of all, but of course he would not openly admit it.

Other than that, he didn't talk much with Raph. It was strange because before the event, they would talk, okay argue most of the time, but they talked. Ever since that awkward scene in the living room of Natalie's apartment with Don and Raph, Leo felt like Raph didn't want anything with him… Even after all those words of encouragement he heard from Raph just the day before. He knew that his brothers loved him. He loved them back. Just right now his mind wasn't in the right place.

He realized that he let his thought to wander a little further tonight and he noticed that Natalie shifted positions often and wasn't focusing on the task in hand. He was worried for her.

What do you say Nat?" Leo asked the distracted Natalie.

"Hm?"

"You are distracted again. And you seem unfocused to our session."

"Sorry Leo." She said. "But I feel awfully hot on the inside, and my head hurts a little. Can we continue later?"

"Sure, whenever you feel okay, you will tell me."

"Deal. What were you-?"

She didn't have time to finish her question, because the moment Natalie got up on her feet and turned around to face Leo, she fell down on the floor hard.

…

The family of three turtles and a rat plus Thomas sat in the living room playing poker, trying not to be beat up by Master Splinter, when the high-pitched scream filled the air. First to shot up from his place was Raphael, followed by Thomas and the rest of his family. He found Natalie sprawled on the floor and a frantic Leo that checked for pulse, but he seemed like he didn't hear them entering in the room.

"Leo, back off!" Donnie called to his older brother. Leo seemed like he was frozen in place. "LEO!" this time Leo's eyes shot to Donnie. He read his lips and he saw Donatello say, _Move_. He listened to his brother's plea and moved out of the way. Thomas picked up Natalie in his arms, and with Raph's help brought her to the couch. Donatello checked her vitals, and while it seemed like nothing was wrong on the outside, Thomas decided that the wisest thing would be if he took her to the hospital. The guys agreed.

Donatello called April and Casey to tell them about the little episode they had, and she said to him that they will check out on Natalie in the hospital. That's when Donatello noticed they were one man, well turtle short.

"Where is Leo guys?"

"I don't know, he was right over… here." Raph said when he realized that Leo didn't come with them in the living room.

"My son? Leonardo?" Master Splinter called out his name.

"Hey Leo you better get your shell here." Raph joined in.

"Leo, it's not funny. Come out." Mike said, voice full of worry.

A minute later they found him crouched on the floor in Natalie's room, clutching his legs tight to his chest, his head resting on his knees.

"Leo?" Raph asked tentatively, when he saw the blank look in Leo's eyes.

The others tried to move, but Raph stopped them. "Get back." He said. "Just get back. Let me deal with him."

They all knew that Raph was the first one Leo responded to that one time when he was almost killed by the Shredder. They also knew that Raph was Leo's best friend once. They decided to listen to Raphael and they backed off.

"Hey fearless." He said as he sat right next to Leo. "Care to tell me what's bothering you?"

"Natalie… I was talking to her, I was excited about a plan I made and I wanted to consult with her if she wanted… if she wanted to come with us… if we could go together like family in Casey's grandmother's farmhouse. I, I never noticed that she wasn't feeling well. It's my fault."

"Seriously Leo, if you start that blaming yourself bullshit, you will hear from me."

"Please Raph don't talk to me like that."

"Like what? Like a worried brother for his older brother? I'm worried because those guilt trips you take every now and then could destroy you. Instead of rising from the floor and come to the living room, face the situation, you sit back here clutching your knees like your life depends on them. Tell me, what the shell is wrong with you Leo?"

"Everything Raph. Everything is wrong with me. Everything is wrong with me."

Raph closed his eyes and took a deep breath. Right now he should be saying something to Leo Right now he should be saying that everything would be alright, that nothing is wrong and that Natalie is okay. But he couldn't. He couldn't say that to his brother and give him false hope. Because he knew what was wrong with her and he kept her secret till today under wraps. He knew that he shouldn't tell Leo anything, but his conscience won.

"Natalie is sick Leo."

"Yeah, tell me something I don't know." Leo retorted.

"She is _sick._ " He accented sick. That earned him a stare from Leo. "She is dying."

The words didn't register in Leo's mind. He continued staring at Raph and look him somehow _weird_. Like he was a madman or something. He even growled that scared Raph to hell.

"Leo…"

"She is sick, and you are telling me this right now after all this time? I understand she didn't want to tell me, but why did you keep it a secret and hid it from your brother? Brothers. Family."

'Leo calm down, please."

"The fuck I'll calm down. Don't tell me to calm down because you fucking know how important she is to me. She gave me back my life."

"No one said that…"

"Just stop talking for fuck's sake."

"Swearing isn't really your thing Leo."

"Oh, so you are going to lecture me on my language Raphael, huh?"

"Leo you are scaring me."

"Good. Because you should be scared. You should be scared, because all this time you were saying to me to open up, so there are no more secrets between us, and you are keeping something from me, your brother, and swearing is your problem?"

"Donnie, get down here, right now!" Raph yelled.

Leo took the first thing he could see and threw it at Raphael. Raph could see the hurt behind Leo's eyes, and the pain and the guilt. But there was deadly precision with which Leo threw the objects that Raph had to dodge them real fast.

When Donnie and Mikey entered in the room a minute later they saw Leo practically like he was having a rabies. Mad, shining eyes, screaming and cursing.

"What did you do to him this time Raph?" Mikey asked as he saw Leo trashing Natalie's room.

"He's having a nervous breakdown." Donnie stated.

"A very violent one apparently." Raph and Mikey said at the same moment.

"Don't you just stand there, help me!" Raphael screamed.

The three brothers were frantically trying to stop maddened Leonardo before he destroyed the room. Raphael managed to catch him, and the way he shrieked when his hand touched the muscles on Leo's right arm, it gave him the chills. His heart was torn to pieces right then. He bit back his own scream as he picked up Leo and tightened the grip around his plastron, careful not to hurt him. Leo's breath caught in his throat and he frantically tried to breathe in some air, but it was like everyone stopped the oxygen. Like that time they were transported to Triceraton home world. They couldn't breathe without help of tanks of oxygen and tubes that went down to their throats.

"And now he is having a panic attack." _Great, just great._ "Leo, listen to me!" the eldest didn't budge. "You have to put your head between your knees and take deep breaths. Can you do that?"

Leo slightly nodded before he did what Don said. He soon returned his breathing to normal and he felt Raphael enveloping him again. For a moment Leo thought Raph was afraid of losing him. He didn't want to think about that. He just thought of the way Natalie fell on the floor in front of his eyes. His tears died in his eyes. He was screaming and crying from the inside. Raph tightened the grip he had on Leo.

Donatello quickly ran out of the room and came back with a mild sedative. He injected Leo with it, and soon Raph felt Leo relaxing in his arms. He held onto his brother and cussed because he was the reason Leo raged and almost hurt himself trying to take the room apart.

Master Splinter sighed at the scene that played in front of him. He didn't want to open his mouth because he knew that Raphael would alienate himself and Leonardo won't focus on his lecture, because he was currently out of it, staring blankly, nowhere in particular, but he had to. "You wanted to say something Raphael?"

 _Fuck_. Raphael took a deep breath and told them everything.

…

When they came back to the apartment it was almost dawn. The news hit them fast and they didn't have time to recover before Thomas quickly ordered April and Casey to go home. He wasn't expecting Natalie to hide something so important from them. From him.

He took a shaky breath as he watched Natalie's growing belly and think of his, theirs baby that was inside of that belly. Natalie was dying, she was going to die… What was he supposed to do with his baby alone? He or she didn't know that before they were born they already lost their mother.

As soon as they entered in the apartment, Natalie felt that something wasn't right. She noticed the brothers sitting in the living room doing nothing, and she noticed Master Splinter in the kitchen.

"What happened here?"

"Leo happened." Raph spit. Despite the anger radiating off of him, he had Leonardo tucked in his side on the couch. He absentmindedly traced Leo's shell with his thumb, in a calming manner. "He repeatedly said that he was guilty for what happened to you, and I had to tell him about you know what. He had a small nervous breakdown and a panic attack. He is okay now though. Although your room died."

"He knew?" Tom asked from behind them and that was the first time Raph acknowledged the cop since he entered in the apartment.

"You know?"

"So, Raph knows and I don't, right?"

"Tom, don't yell please. Leo needs to…"

"Enough Leo and his brothers!"

Leo's head snapped from where it was on Raph's shoulder and he straightened on the couch.

"When are you going to think for yourself for a change Natalie? You are dying for God's sake. Think a little to what is going to happen. You are pregnant, ill and all you care is Leo and his family. I understand what are they going through, been there done that myself, but you are too much into them and not into you."

Natalie listened to Tom's words. She hated to admit that he was right. But the Hamatos were her family now and she wasn't going to turn her back to them. Not, after what they've been through.

"You are right." She finally said, taking Leo's hand into hers sitting next to him. "I care too much for Leo. I care too much for this family. I know what you've been through, and you know what they've been through yourself, because you were there. I know that it was tough on you watching your sister disappear in front of your eyes, then losing her to that bastard Jensen. I understand, because I've seen the change in Leo, when you didn't."

Tom recoiled and bit back a reply.

"I know that you want the best for me, and right now, it's me that should take care of myself. I know you'll say that Leonardo has his brothers and his father. But the minute I was entangled in this web when he was turtle-napped and taken from the hospital, it became personal. And he became an important person in my life. He is an important person in my life. I grew up without my mother with only my father and grandfather by my side. When I married Darren and had Lea I thought that I found the true happiness. It was short-lived. They died. Then, I found you. You were the light in my life I was looking for, albeit not consciously. I love you, and I'd do everything for you, but if you ask me to give up on Leonardo to take care of myself, that's not going to happen. They are my family, and I consider him my younger brother." She squeezed Leo's hand. Leo still had that blank face expression and said nothing.

Silence.

Splinter finally broke the awkward silence bringing tea for everyone.

"Here my daughter." He said. Natalie gratefully accepted a cup. Leonardo took one too. "Please my daughter tell us about how you found out that you were ill."

Natalie sighed. She knew the moment will come, but she hated to have to tell them this. She secretly hoped that she would never have to do this. "It happened short time before I met you guys. One day, I felt sick and dizzy. At first I thought it was nothing, I didn't pay much attention to it. Then I noticed the bruises on my body. I had an idea of what might be the problem. I went to the doctors and he confirmed the symptoms and the illness. I am ill and it is leukemia. I was in shock when the doctor first told me about my illness, but I soon accepted it. Now you know why I didn't want to go deeper in our relationship Tom."

Tom swallowed the lump in his throat and continued to stare at nowhere in particular, all but in Natalie. He was still pissed off and didn't want to talk to her. He realized that his words were wrong earlier, but his pride won't let him say sorry to Leo and his family.

"I talked to the doctor over the next few days when he ran the tests and she said that I have some rare form of leukemia that spread faster than it was expected and that I don't have much time left, maybe a year or so, maybe less. At first I felt like someone kicked me in the gut and I couldn't accept the fact that I was dying, that everything that I ever worked for, what I did will go down with me. I never had the heart to tell Tom the truth. I love you Tom and I know that I hurt you, but try to understand me."

"Believe me Nat, I do, but I still wish that you told me earlier."

"I decided to keep it a secret, until I could feel some worse symptoms. Raph... Well Raph was the one that brought me out of my misery and pulled me out of my own head. At first it was you Leo, your heart stopped in our way back to New York. For just a moment in the Battle Shell, your heart stopped. I felt dizzy earlier that night and I felt this piercing and enormous pain when I leaned to look at the structure of the bomb under the car seat where Donatello was sitting. Then I obviously asked for his help when with all knowledge and my skills I could've performed the action all by myself. The very same night, Raph came into my room with a bottle of wine. He asked me about me, and he made me think of what was happening to me. He noticed the weight loss and everything else. It was just a matter of time when he would've found out about it by himself. So, I told him everything."

"I vowed to myself that I wouldn't reveal her secret until she was ready to tell you all. We were worried about Fearless and his reaction to the news." said Raph, eyeing Leonardo who sat stiffly on the couch, unusually still and quiet. Must have been the sedative. "I encouraged her to tell you guys, to tell you Tom and she said to me that now after all we've been through she will... And I ended up telling Leo everything."

"I was going to talk to you and tell you about it, when my pregnancy popped up, just like Don said it that morning. I couldn't believe I was pregnant. It came so quickly…"

"My son may not be a doctor, but he certainly knows many things Natalie." said Master Splinter.

"I believe so Sensei. Anyway... I was at the doctor's yesterday, my gynecologist said that my pregnancy may be actually a good thing for my illness. It will certainly give me some more time and I don't feel that bad like I used to. But, I can't help the dizziness and the nausea, and the pain I feel. That's why under her strict order I take the proper medications and everything is going fine. Till now anyway. I just hope that there won't be much surprises like this one in future. No more secrets. And no more tantrums like the one you did while I was _gone_ Leo." She eyed him. "I liked my room the way it was before."

"You are kidding right?" Leonardo said from his spot on the couch. "What else could possibly surprise us?" the irony in his voice didn't escape Natalie.

"Maybe the fact that I'm pregnant with twins."

…

The Hamato family left Natalie alone with Thomas. They decided that it will be the best if they left the two lovers alone to settle their differences, and they needed rest too. It was almost 9 p.m. and they needed to sleep after all they experienced yesterday night and this morning.

Back in the apartment Natalie and Thomas sat in the living room, no one having the guts to break the silence. Both of them were full of pride and no one will let go just because they were too proud to do so.

Thomas stared at the wall, and with such a ferocity that the wall could actually break under the pressure. Natalie stared at him. She knew that he was thinking. And when he was thinking, which was often, he hurt his brain to come up with something to say. She knew she had the fault with not telling him about something very important, and she didn't want it to be this way. But, it happened and it was up to her, and Thomas to fix their broken bond.

"You know if you continue with the silent treatment I might just go and get some sleep." She said first. "Plus I think you are pretty late for work, and unless you call your supervisor to tell him that you are going to be late for work, you are going to be cooked when he sees you the next time."

"You see, there. Right there is the source of my anger and frustration." Thomas said. "You care for everybody and not for you. You care if I go to work, if I'm being late or if Leo is okay, if he's breathing, if he eats properly."

"How do you-?"

"I eavesdropped a conversation between you and Donatello accidentally one day."

"Well, that's me. And if you cannot accept that fact, then this ends here."

"What do you mean by that?"

"I mean that if you don't understand what I'm doing or why I'm doing it, then our thing ends here."

"I love you Natalie."

"I love you too Thomas. But I want to know where we are. You clearly went crazy last night. I understand that it's tough for you, but it's tougher for me. I have to bear the fact that I'm dying and that I'm pregnant, and that soon I'll have two babies instead of one, and the fact that I won't be there for them while they grow up…" she didn't finish her sentence, when she felt Thomas kissing her on the mouth.

Deep, sweet kiss that erased all of her current thoughts.

"I love you. I'd die for you. I want you to be with me, I want to be with you. You are the yin to my yang Nat. And I want to have these babies with you. I want to love you till your end. It doesn't matter if it will be tomorrow or in 5 months, in a year. I want to be with you every single day until you decide to say goodbye to this world and to me. I love you and nothing would change that. You know that sometimes I let my anger get the best of me and I say some things that I regret, but I was so mad that you disclosed something so important from me, that I took it on Leo."

"My love for you hasn't changed. And I already told you why I didn't say anything earlier. I was afraid of what would happen with us if I told you. I didn't want you to be with me, just because I was going to die someday soon. I wanted to be because of you feeling the same I do."

"I understand. Plus I think that you'll never stop worrying for me or for Leo or for his family. And that's kinda sexy. Mother hen mode. You know, the mother looking over her children, making sure everything's alright and stuff."

Natalie huffed out a laugh. "That's me Tommy boy. Besides I only care so much for the people I love. And Leo grew on me since I first saw him. He is like my younger brother or something you know. And I kinda like it. From zero I went to a family of four a stepfather, my friend April and her boyfriend Casey and well I had you…" she blushed. Thomas' grin couldn't have been bigger.

"Like I said honey, you are filling in all my blanks. And I want to spend the rest of my life with you."

"Me too."

"We should totally marry Nat."

"One marriage was enough for me. Don't get me wrong, I would love to, but after I found out about Darren's betrayal I realized that marriage was based on lies and deception and I don't want to connect marriage with our thing."

"As you say princess."

Thomas realized that this was the first time Natalie spoke about Darren since they all heard the horrible truth in those woods when they went after Leo four months ago. And he was certain that she hasn't told anyone how she felt about that.

Right there and right then she understood that she had more in common with Leo than she thought.

…

Leonardo took off again the next morning. He did that often in the months after his family and friends rescued him. He found solace in Natalie's apartment and that was why he kept coming back there. He said to himself that he needed to clear his head and get out of the lair. The truth was that he wanted to distance himself from his family. He felt like he failed them, again. And he felt like an embarrassment for them and he wanted to spend as little time with them as possible. He knew that all of his brothers worried about him, but he thought that they shouldn't do that. He saw what happened when they said bad things about him. He fought with Raph and Donnie that one time in the living room of Natalie's apartment. He fought with Raph again yesterday. Then he scared the living shit out of them with his breakdown and panic attack. Definitely not on his list, but he freaked out when he saw Natalie on the floor, unconscious.

Mikey made his favorite dishes and was constantly telling him jokes to make him feel comfortable. Master Splinter tried to reach him too, but he kept resisting his father's pleas. April and Casey came to their lair and Natalie's apartment multiple times over the 3 months that passed since his tried to take his own life, but neither one of them succeeded to convince Leonardo to open up. The only one that didn't ask questions, and instead she just listened to him, almost always saying nothing was Natalie.

Most of the time she pried the questions open, not asking them.

The other reason why he came to her apartment, was because of it. Because here he found the strength to move on, and not let his brothers down. Sometimes he would ask something. Natalie would reply to and he will go on with the thing he came for in the first place. Most of the time he spent on the roof, thinking, or in the master bedroom meditating.

He thought of the lyrics of one of his favorite songs, actually it was Raph's favorite band, Green day and it was called "Boulevard of broken dreams." It went like this:

 _ **I walk a lonely road**_

 _ **The only one that I have ever known**_

 _ **Don't know where it goes**_

 _ **But it's home to me and I walk alone.**_

Right now, he was trying not to think about the conversation they all had with Natalie yesterday, right here in her apartment.

Leo exhaled as he felt a presence behind him, and a minute later he saw Raphael next to him.

"So here it is your hiding place Fearless, huh?"

"Raph, I don't want to fight…"

"Relax Leo, I'm not here to fight. I wanted to um, just to see where, um, where you are going every time when you leave the lair. I know that you don't want us following you, or asking you questions as to your whereabouts at times, but I'm… I'm worried Leo. We just got you back, and I… I don't want to lose you Leo. I know I suck at these emotional babble, I'm more of a punch guy, but I think I let you off the hook long enough. You and I need to talk about you and what happened to you and the consequences. Yesterday is a witness to that. I wondered why we always found you here already when we'd arrive."

Leo considered Raph's words when he decided that he should face his brother. He got up from the couch, but he felt a small pain in the chest.

"Leo you okay?"

"Yes."

"You winced when you got up that's why I asked."

"Listen Raph, I'm not the baby, so cut it okay? These past few months I've been listening to yours "be careful", then "you will hurt yourself", next "don't go anywhere without one of us being with you". I'm tired Raph! Tired! When will you and the others understand that I'm not a cripple and that I'm fine?! Please don't treat me like this. I can't even have a bloody heart problem without you pestering me."

"Well now you know what it's like when you are babying me!" Raph snapped too.

Leo looked at his younger brother and saw how mature he looked for his age. He thought in himself that he changed him and the others big time. They never really talked about what happened to him that night and it was like a precedent between them to not mention that horrible night. Natalie helped them big time and Leonardo was grateful for that. But, it was enough. He got enough of care and surveillance.

"Listen Raph... I know that I am the one that always says that you should take care, and I'm choking you with my overly protective behavior. But I'm the oldest and being the leader, it comes naturally to me. I love you and I care for you, but what you are doing, it's not normal. You are controlling my movements, what I eat, how much sleep do I get, what I'm doing. And I'm surprised because of it. Master Splinter was the one asking those questions while I was younger, but then even he stopped asking. Why are you doing this to me?"

"Payback."

Leo frowned.

"I'm kidding Fearless, I wouldn't pay you back in this condition. If I was to pay you back you would've felt it hard on your shell, be sure of that."

"I'm feeling that my brothers are ganging up against me. You want to take care of me? Leave me the fuck alone!"

"Wow, what a language. I am flattered Leo. Now, what other thing your younger brother taught you huh?"

"Raph, will you please stop?! Just stop!"

"I won't stop and you know it. You don't live by yourself, you have a family, you have brothers and a father, and you have friends. You are not alone okay? What happens to you happens to me, Don, Mikey, and Splinter! April, Casey, even Natalie and Thomas! We all love you and care about you. We want to know that you are safe, that nothing bad will happen to you. You are our root, and if the root is yanked from the ground the trunk falls immediately altogether with the leaves and the branches. I was so pissed off at you for not telling us about the gsw, but the fact is that you didn't remember about it. That's okay, I'm over it. What happened to you it wasn't fair. But, it wasn't just you that suffered. We suffered too." Raph took a deep breath. "I understand bro. I understand believe me. Not literally, but I understand. Please try to understand us. Me. We are here for you, like you are always there for us when we need you. Let us help you. You scream for help brother, but you are unawares of it."

"Maybe I don't want help Raphael."

"Okay. Enough self-pity Leo! Enough! You are not the only one that was a victim of a rape! You are not the last one neither! And if you don't stop this crap I will stop you for sure!"

"Yeah? Well, you can try your luck Raph. Come on! Try!"

Raphael was screaming and cussing when he charged. He was surprised by Leo's strength. Both of them pulled some punches. The final blow was given by Raphael. He hit Leo square on his face and when he saw the blood sipping from his brother's nose and mouth he regretted it the same moment.

"I'm sorry... I didn't mean to hit you that hard... Leo?"

"What did you mean by "I understand, but not literally" Raph?" Leo said instead of answering him.

Oh-oh. "I… um… nothing Leo, I just wanted to…"

"Yeah, right." Leo snorted.

"Okay, Leo, the night we rescued you, Rojas came back to the woods, where they buried you alive. He wanted to tell us what Jensen did to you and the others, to redeem himself for what he did so far. He thought that he double crossed Jensen, but out of the blue Jensen appeared. He held us all at gunpoint. He killed Rojas."

Leo continued to stare at Raph. Raph was scared for his big brother, _again_.

"He managed to escape even after I stabbed him with my sai, and Natalie had him shot in the shoulder. I ran off after him. I guess that he was hidden in a bush. He tackled me on the ground and he…"

Leo's breath caught in his throat.

"He touched me like he wanted to possess me. Like he wanted to… I'm sure you know about the way he did that."

"He did anything to you? Raph!"

"No, he didn't have a chance to. I killed him before he even made the next move."

"You… you killed him? You…"

"Listen to me Leo, please focus, and please look at me!"

The fierce look in Leo's eyes scared Raph to hell. It sent chills down his spine. He backed up a little.

"I killed him. Yes, I did it. I did it because of you, because of me and because of the others. I never thought of killing someone before, I mean we have hurt Dragons and Foot in our fights, but never killed someone. When I punched him for the first time I felt anger. I continued, hit after hit, hit after hit… Until Natalie pulled me off of his dead body. I don't like that I killed a man Leonardo." He used his whole name. "But, I did it for all the right reasons. And I want you to understand me. Not to judge me big brother."

"I understand." Leo whispered and Raph had to strain himself as to listen to what Leo said. "I understand Raph, and I won't judge you. Probably I would've done the same, if I were you."

Leo couldn't believe in what he was hearing. First Natalie killed Hun, and now Raphael killed Jensen.

"Leo are you okay?"

"Yeah." He said while looking in the direction of the wall.

"Leo I know you. You are not okay. Why don't you let me in for a sec?"

Leo turned his head and focused his gaze on Raph. He read so many things in his eyes. And for the first time he realized that what his brothers and friends were doing and they were doing it for him, because they loved him and respected him. It wasn't pity, it was love. Like Raph told him once. There was love in his eyes.

Then Leo did something that he vowed not to do anymore. He cried again in front of his brothers. Leo was fragile and no matter what he or Don or Mike did, it turned out that they were treating Leo as a doll from porcelain. Leo cried. He cried in anguish. He even screamed. He let go of all the pent up emotions. And Raph held him, supporting him while Leo emptied his soul. They needed each other right now.

That's how Natalie found them, on the floor hugging each other and she smiled, because Raph was keeping his promise after all. Then she saw the blood and the bruises and she all but screamed.

"What happened here?"

"Um... We had a little brotherly talk Nat."

"Yeah I can see that Raphael."

"We solved it Natalie." Leo said and sniffed.

"Here, take this." she gave Leo a tissue.

After Leo wiped the blood and tears from his nose and face he got up and went to the bathroom. Raph was right. It was time for him to let his family and friends help him. He was the one that always dealt with his businesses alone, but this one time, he decided to swallow his pride and let his brothers help him. They didn't deserve his denial.

He cleaned himself and came into the living room.

"You are right Raph." Leo said.

"About what Fearless?" he said as he supported his brother while he sat down on the couch. He enveloped him in an embrace as Natalie seated herself on the other side of Leo and took one of his hands in hers.

"I need help. And I want you to help me. I want to be the old self, I don't want to be afraid anymore, to walk and always look behind my back to see if someone is following me... I want to be free again."

By the time Leo finished with his speech Don and Mike joined them in the apartment. Later on Splinter arrived, bringing April, Casey and Thomas with him. They all listened to Leo and what he had to say.

"I realized that nothing will go away if I just sit and do nothing about it. Instead of feeling sorry for myself, I decided to move on. With your help. I need that in order to keep my sanity. I love you all and thank you for everything. I know I've been a hard ass over the months that passed, but it was tough for me. I know that I've been running here every chance I got, because I didn't want you to see me defeated. I didn't want you to see me crying, and I knew that Natalie wouldn't say a word to you for whatever happened here. Thanks Nat." Leo sighed and found strength in her hand on top of his hand, and Raph's embrace. "I hope that you can understand me and that at some point our lives we will be back to normal, and we'll be the family we once were."

Everyone nodded and was deep in thought of Leo's words. Then each and every one of them gave Leo a reassuring hug, last being Master Splinter.

"I'm so proud of you my son. I knew that you would come back to us. Welcome home Leonardo. Welcome to the first day of your life."

Leonardo leaned in his father's touch when he heard Casey saying behind his back, "So, who wants a little late fall vacation to the farmhouse?"

Leo had to laugh at that one, because it was initially his idea to go to the farmhouse. Right then Raphael knew that he got his real brother back.

 _ **Check my vital signs to know I'm still alive…**_


	17. The Leader

Chapter 17 – The Leader

* * *

" **No matter how awful you think it is, I promise you, you are not alone."**

 **-Derek Morgan,** _ **Criminal Minds**_ **-**

* * *

…

Sometimes he still felt like he was trapped in that room in that damned warehouse on Staten Island. It was in nights like these, when he had horrible nightmares that he thought of what really happened to him. Because in those nightmares he dreamed of awful things that Jensen did to him. In those dreams Jensen raped him repeatedly until he lost consciousness, he electrocuted him multiple times until he gave in and died from exhaustion, in others he was starved till death, and he still couldn't force himself to say something to that man that plagued his dreams. He knew that he was dead, that he is only imagining this in his head hat those are his internal demons that attack him from the inside and that give him enough force as to think of the worst that could've happened to him while he was held captive.

When in fact he was safe at home with his brothers. He was in the safety of their lair, with his three brothers that loved him more than he ever thought, and he loved them back. His father that held even deeper love for his eldest, and wasn't ashamed to show it…

He kicked the nightmare in its face with happy thoughts of his family, well his slightly dysfunctional family, that was too loud at times, but he had to admit that after all he went through, and the consequences, he enjoyed the sound of "loudness" in his home. He wanted to feel normal again. Not just like some oversensitive giant turtle that couldn't even go out by himself and not be pestered about his health and the importance of a brother to be always with him in those moments.

They fought over who needed to do that duty, well they all wanted to, but after some talk they had on their way to the farmhouse, Leonardo chose Raphael. At first they were shocked, because Leo chose his opposite and judging by their past fights and their history together, they could have sworn that he would choose either Mikey or Donnie. Leo was always calm, and Raph was always angry, and rash, and they feared that if Leo wanted to do something Raph disapproved, then they would fight again and Leo's state could get even worse.

When that discussion took place inside of the Battle Shell just as the tires screeched to a halt that told them they left New York City behind, Leonardo with one swift motion of his hand, graceful even in his state of a tiredness and slightly pale face, silenced them all. He told them his reasons why he chose his immediate younger brother. The reasons were many. He couldn't say just one reason why he chose Raph. He stated few that were enough to make his brothers and father and friends to nod in understanding. Raph was the perfect choice.

…

It was late at night when they arrived at the farm house. Leo felt sleepy and tired from the journey and he immediately climbed the stairs and claimed a room for himself. April and Casey were going there every once in a while, so the house was pretty much clean, but it needed a little warm up. So while Casey, Mikey and Donnie geared with flashlights and winter clothes went to chop some wood for the fireplace, Natalie and Thomas went in one of the rooms so they can rest. Splinter did the same.

Raphael realized that he was left alone in the big living room and he caught himself staring at the couch that not many years ago held the almost dead body of his older brother. He still remembered the pang in his chest when Leo reacted to his voice first, and he kinda felt special because of that. He always knew Leo and him were connected in a way that only twins could be connected.

A lump in his throat burned and he turned his face far from the couch. He wasn't aware that he was leaning against the window in front of which he hid his tears from his family, when they all tried to make Leonardo to get back to the land of the living. And they succeeded. He was back.

He was taken away from them so many times and then he was miraculously patched up and given back to them that he lost count. You lost count easily with Leo. He witnessed some of the stages of healing his brother went through, and nothing that anyone else said and done could convince Raphael that they suffered more than Leo did.

Besides, Leo, most of the time suffered from mental pain, not physical pain. He suffered for his family. He wasn't just bearing his pain. He took the pain of them three, and their father upon himself. He was the leader, and instead for one he suffered for five.

Raphael took in a deep breath and decided that first thing in the morning he will check on Leo to see if he is okay, but going to one of the rooms, he listened muffled voice mumbling something in a slumber state. He couldn't make out much of what the voice was saying, but the voice was all too familiar, and before Raphael knew it, he was in front of the room Leo picked earlier that night, and opened the door. He saw his brother thrashing and moaning and his first reaction was to touch his brother, and calm him down. He pinned his arms to the sides, squeezing his wrists that he could swear, they would've popped by now if he used his real Raph strength he often did when attacking Leo in the past.

He hated himself for that.

Leo kept thrashing and he had to call out his name few times before Fearless opened his eyes and looked at him with cloudy look in his eyes.

Leonardo blinked few times, but when it was clear that the image of three Raphaels pinning him to the bed in his room wasn't going to disappear, he cleared his already sore throat (he didn't say anything about that during their trip to the farmhouse, he didn't want them to treat him like a baby after the conversation they all had in Natalie's living room) and asked in a voice barely above a whisper "What's going on Raph?"

"You were having a bad dream bro. I wanted to make sure that you won't hurt yourself."

For the first time in months, Leo relaxed in his brother's touch and he didn't move himself from the position he was in. Instead, he let Raph to keep his hands on him, because he wanted to fight the urge to scream and punch Raph, because he touched him. He wanted to forget those filthy hands of Jensen that trailed up and down his body in a consistent pattern while he had him tortured and then viciously raped. He wanted to feel normal again.

"Am I hurting you Leo?"

"No, Raph, you are not. I was just thinking…" he smiled sheepishly. "I was thinking about your touch and how soothing it feels on my arms, how different from what his hands felt like on my body."

This was the first time Leo opened up about that aspect of his torture, and Raph could not pass this opportunity so easily and that's why he made himself comfortable on the edge of the bed, while Leo raised his body slightly so he was sat against the wall and next to his brother.

"I know that this is not easy for you Leo and you know that I would give everything just to spare you from what you went through."

"I know Raph. But it can't be helped now that it already happened. You can help me you know, each and every one of you can help me."

"I have one question before we move on with the helping thing."

"Yes?"

"Why did you let Natalie touch you, and you always flinched when some of us did that and you almost jumped when we were too close to you?"

"After I, um… tried to kill myself, we had a nice talk and she asked me the same thing. I don't know why that happened Raph. It would be logical that I would react like that to touch, and loud voices, and I would be more sensitive, but the truth is… I don't really know. I guess that she was something like a mothering figure right then and I felt that everyone thought I was a failure, good for nothing, and there was something in her eyes I saw every time I looked in them… Maybe I didn't want to look in your eyes because I thought that I wasn't worth it anymore… I was in a dark place for a while Raphael and I guess my defense mechanism hit full force, and defended me from my own family. It felt awful until I realized what I was doing to myself. Unconsciously I was killing myself and I was killing my family. I hope you can forgive me one day."

"Nothing to forgive you Leo. I would've done it the same, if I were you and I think that we are all allowed to cross some borders, test our limits, and see what this other aspect of our personality brings us, but under one term. We need to always come back to what we are, to what we were in the moment we changed. And I will be glad to help you overcome this situation. I'm sure you will get past this in no time. With mine, and of course our help. You have many people that love you Leo and that would always be here for you, no matter what."

"Thank you Raph." Leo put one of his arms around Raph's shoulder and squeezed him in a one-side hug. For a moment both brothers stood there, the time irrelevant. But, then Raphael felt heat coming in waves, and it wasn't from his always overheated body, like Mikey used to call the fact he was always the warm turtle. And Leo was the over sensitive one that always caught everything. Stomach virus, flu, cold, you name it.

"Leo?"

"Mmmm?"

"You alright?"

Leo decided that this was one of those days when he should be honest with Raph. And honestly he felt tired of keeping his pain and his feelings for himself. He taught himself to this unwritten rule that he would never tell his family or friends the amount of pain he was in when he was hurt. But, that rule was fading away as a new pang of pain in his temples attacked Leo.

"Nope. I have a headache. Throat feels sore."

"Why didn't you say something earlier? Don't answer that, I already know what you will say." Raph couldn't hide his smirk from his voice when he spoke.

"Raph, you know me all too well."

"Same goes to you Fearless."

"Hothead."

"Hey, someone is partying here without us." Donatello spoke from the door, leaning on the wooden frame, but his smile faded the moment he saw Raphael's scrunched up face. "Everything alright?"

"Leo here has a sore throat, and a headache. And I think I have a heating oven next to me, so if he hasn't swallowed one while I wasn't watching, I'd say that he is having a fever. You don't have to be a doctor to guess that one Donnie boy."

Raphael's sense of humor was poor, that was Mikey's job, but when Raph wanted to make you laugh, he'll make you laugh. After they laughed for a few moments, Donatello checked Leo and he figured out that it was a simple cold that'll vanish in a few days, if treated. He went to take some medicine to reduce the fever, while Mikey went to take a clean towel and ice cold water so he can try and reduce the temperature and help a little. Raph and Leo were all alone again.

Raph giggled as he thought of a thing that could keep Fearless awake while Doctor Donnie checked on him thousand times over the next few hours. He strictly ordered Leo not to go to sleep yet. He wanted to be sure the fever was gone before he ordered the oldest to let himself rest.

…

Leo couldn't in a million years guess that the tactic Raph had in mind was for them to say out loud their favorite quotes. Leo had an eidetic memory, almost like Donnie, but he wasn't aware Raph could remember so many quotes, and each and every one of those quotes was quoted word by word.

"Let me use your analogy, Hothead, it seems to me that you swallowed a scanner. How the shell did you remember so many quotes?"

"I learned from the best Fearless."

Leo furrowed a brow.

"I listened to you and Master Splinter saying quotes by famous Japanese samurai, from actors in his soap operas, singers, artists, and even lyrics from songs. And I figured out since you two can remember so many words for a long time, I could do just the same."

"You one bad turtle." Leo chuckled. "You are really naughty. Eavesdropping is not nice Raphie."

"I like to break the rules, what can I say."

"And get angry."

"That too."

"You will not be punished for your anger, you will be punished by your anger." Leonardo said.

"Holding on to anger is like grasping a hot coal with the intent of throwing it at someone else, you are the one who gets burned." Raphael replied.

"Do not dwell in the past, do not dream of the future, concentrate the mind on the present moment." Leo said, smirking to his younger brother.

"No one saves us but ourselves. No one can and no one may. We ourselves must walk the path."

"Without health life is not life; it is only a state of languor and suffering - an image of death." Don said. "Enough citing the Buddha you two. Leo let me measure your temperature."

Don took in the red and puffy eyes and flushed cheeks. He checked Leo's forehead, and cussed when he felt the hotness.

"This is not good." He muttered under his breath.

"What's up Don?"

"The temperature has risen for another degree. It's so close to 40 degrees Celsius that I think we need to give him a cold bath. Raph can you help Leo?"

"Of course Don." Raph grumbled as he got up from the bed.

"I can walk by myself Doctor." Leo said, angry that he was treated like a baby this whole time, but after he placed on foot on the floor and got up from the bed, he felt lightheaded and dizziness attacked him. His knees buckled and he felt strong emerald arms taking a hold of him before he hit the floor.

"You were saying?" Raph said.

Leo laughed at that. That was a hysterical laugh.

Raph silently cursed under his breath and looked questioningly at Donnie that shrugged his shoulders.

Down the hall a door opened and Thomas showed his head. "What's up guys?"

"Nothing dude. Leo is a little sick, but nothing to worry about. We will tell you if his state changes." Mikey said.

"Okay. But, seriously, tell us if there is something we can do." Tom looked worried. With everything the turtles went through they didn't need another problem. He quietly closed the door and told Natalie the news.

…

Don filled the bathtub with ice cold water and ordered Raphael do put Leo in the water gently.

Raph did that and took a seat next to the tub.

"You should take a sponge and gently move it up and down his arms and legs. That way the blood will move normally through his body and his limbs won't freeze from the temperature of the water. And the effect will be quicker that way." Natalie's sleepy voice sounded from the door.

Raph swore under his breath and Donatello jumped. Mikey laughed at his two brothers and went to bring a chair for Natalie. "Here Nat, you shouldn't be on your feet too much."  
"Thank you Mikey, you are so thoughtful."

"Don't mention it. It's my job to make my family and friends happy and safe."

"Yep. By goofing off." Raph piped in.

"Someone has too Hothead."

"Easy tiger." Natalie said, smiling. "So, how is he?"

"It seems like the bath is making its effect. His temperature is dropping."

"That's good. He is strong, he'll fight the cold. But, what's worrying me, it's his heart. Because of his heart, his immunity is weaker and that's why it may take him a while longer before he beats the cold faster."

"I thought of the same thing Nat. So many things happened to Leo's body and organs, that I think it would be a while before his organism learns how to cope with it."

Natalie nodded, busy with her thoughts. After a few minutes Raphael helped Leonardo from the tub, while Donatello wrapped a blanket around him and dried him.

As the hours went by, the temperature dropped completely and Leonardo was able to sleep normally. But, his breathing was altered, and he felt like he had a rock lodged in his throat.

Five days later he was finally feeling better as to move around the house, and even went out, even in the cold weather. The first hint of snow could be felt in the chilly air.

…

Being free wasn't a common feeling between the turtles and the rat. Splinter knew that very well. He knew it, because when they first set a foot on this land, Casey's farmhouse that once belonged to his grandmother, that his sons weren't truly free. They were free in a sense that they weren't captured or held against their will. But, they weren't free to enjoy the life the people on Earth could. They weren't free to mix with the common people and enjoy what was offered in a world so big, yet so small. So, they were hiding, like cowards. Something that was beyond words and deeds. But, they had to. They had to in order to not be marked like kappa, tengu and other stuff they were called throughout the centuries. And so they did.

When the unpleasant circumstances few years ago brought his family here, Splinter thought that it was much more like in Japan when he lived with his Master Yoshi. It was clear, grass everywhere, clear air, trees, wood… It had an aura of a home. It was true what Yoshi told him once, albeit he couldn't say anything to him at that moment. He said "Home isn't a place, but a feeling. Home is where your heart is. Where your family is. Home is wherever you feel like it. Your home can be your wife, your kids, the sky…"

Ah, a wise man was, Hamato Yoshi.

Splinter was stirred from his thoughts when he heard voices coming from downstairs. It sounded like the two eldest.

…

Raph came downstairs to think about something that bothered him for a few days now, and he decided to speak with Splinter the same day about it, when he felt a presence behind him. He looked at the fireplace, the fire crackling and reflecting in his onyx eyes.

"Hey Raph."

"Hey Leo."

"What are you doing?"

"Nothing. I'm thinking."

"You thinking?"

"Obviously a turtle can think sometimes." Raph winked and moved himself to sit on the couch. Leo followed suit.

"You were pestering me to open up not too long ago. Now, why won't you do the same Raph?"

"It's no big deal Fearless."

"It's big deal for me."

Raph sighed. "I was thinking about me being the leader while you were healing. We all agreed that until you are able to take your position again, I would lead, but Leo, I think that it is about time so you can get your title, and your place among the family back."

"What… what do you mean Raph?"

"I want to give you the role of the leader back to you. Right now if you prefer."

"But… Raph, I don't think that I'll be able to lead again. At least not as I used to."

"Are you kidding me? You are great leader, Fearless. Nothing stopped you before slapping me, and stating loudly that you were the leader, and that we should follow your orders. What's stopping you from doing the same thing again?"

"I am tainted Raph. I am broken beyond repair. I am just a ghost that's walking among the land of the living that came back from the hell itself. I am not the leader you know."

"Yes you are!"

"No! I'm not! Nothing you say will ever change that. Besides, you always wanted the leader position. Now you have the chance. Take it. And don't blow it!"

Leo went through the front door as Splinter took the final step and joined Raphael.

"I don't know what else should I do Father."

"Let me handle it Raphael. He'll come around."

"I hate this Sensei."

"I do too, my son. I do too. But we have to fight it until it's gone. I didn't raise you or your brothers so I can see you destroy yourself. I will fight with all means necessary, and Leonardo will be no exception when it comes to accepting the facts and moving forwards. I know he knows we all feel his pain, and we have love and compassion for him, but I think that he doesn't understand the extent of that pain, what's causing us all as well. I can understand him, but if it were you, or Donatello or Michelangelo on his place right now, he would've preached the same I do now."

"We were lucky that you found us that day."

"I was luckier."

Raphael watched as his father vanished through the door. He sighed and got up again. Soon Don and Mikey joined him.

…

 **-A week later-**

"Something troubles you my son?"

Leo heard his father's voice that pulled him out of his thoughts. He was watching the stars in the night sky under the big oak tree in the yard. They spent a wonderful week at the farmhouse and he kinda wished they could stay there forever.

There they could be themselves, with no need to hide from the outer world.

But his thoughts really troubled him and he smiled inwardly at the insight his father had on him and his brothers.

"Yeah, well actually lot of things trouble me Sensei."

"Want to tell me?"

Leo sighed. "I know that you told Raph that he will be the leader while I was recovering."

"Yes, I did."

"Well, have you thought about continuing his leadership?"

"What are you trying to say Leonardo?"

"I'm saying that you should consider it… um, Raph to be the leader instead of me."

"What?"

"I'm not the Leonardo I was before this happened. Before I was stripped off of everything descent I had in myself. The little dignity I have left in me drove me to want to take my own life. I thought I failed you, but what happened really was my mind tricking me and I let my weaknesses show. Something a leader cannot be allowed to do."

"I have never in these 17 years doubted you my son. And in the years since you was named leader, I never doubted your leadership skills, nor your ability to protect us. Raphael leads with his heart, you with your mind. What happened to you was awful, I understand. You were in a dark place, thinking that you failed us, that what happened to you was embarrassing. It was in sorts, because you didn't want us taking care of you. You wanted to get out of this mess by yourself. But you are forgetting one thing Leonardo. We are family and we are here for each other, so if you are hurt, if you have a bad day or if you just want to rest, your family is here to keep your safe and take the wheel for just one bit. I trust you all my sons. But, I trust you the most with the leadership of this family and I know that as soon as you get out of your funk and face the reality as it is again, you'll have no trouble being the leader you once were. Besides, you are teenager. I know that you don't want to feel weakness that you don't want to show your weakness, your fears, your doubts, but sometimes, just sometimes in order to move on, you need to let go. And what a better way of dealing with everything than telling us if something is wrong my son?"

"But, what about my heart problem? And…"

"No one said that your leadership should last 24/7 Leonardo. We are all here to help you after all. I mean I don't know how much can Michelangelo and Donatello help with their minds in the clouds, but they love you and they'll do anything to you. Raphael is beginning to control his anger and rage and he showed you the love he feels for you and the way he cares for you brought tears to my eyes the other day. All of them have been affected from what happened to you and the outcome, but I think Raphael suffered the most, because he had to kill and because he was also an inch from losing his sanity. I'm not saying that you should blame the killing on yourself, I'm just saying that he'd do whatever it takes to make your safe. Even lead the team while the leader is injured."

Leo smiled at his father and thanked him for this talk that he needed so bad. They still trusted him. They loved him. They were family.

"Besides I think that you and Raphael are more connected than the two of you think?"

"Huh?"

"When we came to the warehouse on Staten Island, short before we entered in the yard, Raphael experienced a sharp pain to the chest, right about the time you said you tried to escape from the room where they held you."

Leonardo nodded.

"Well, you said you were kicked square in the chest…"

"I was. I don't see the point."

"Well, I always thought you two had a special bond, the one of twins."

"What are you saying Master Splinter?"

"I say that your bond of brothers is special. You are all connected, but it seems to me that you and Raphael are born like twins. You are so much alike, and once upon a time you were best friends…"

Leo nodded and shivered involuntarily. Splinter put a pawed hand on Leo's shoulder. Leo relaxed in the one-sided hug his father was giving him. Soon after he felt a warm blanked draped around him and he found Raph smirking from above him.

"Thought you'd be cold and I brought the blanket."

"Thanks Raph."

"No problem Leo. Sensei, you can enter inside. I'll take it from here."

"Thank you very much Raphael. I know you'll take great care of Leonardo. Don't stay too late, we have to go tomorrow. Good night my sons."

"Night Sensei." Leo and Raph replied in unison.

Raph hugged Leo closer, and for a moment both of them just stood there not saying anything. Then "Just how much did you listen of our conversation Raph?"

"Enough. Enough to tell you that you should never doubt your leader skills. I know I'm always calling you on it, but I guess I just want your attention."

"Big strong Raphael finally admitted something."

"Look who's talking."

"Your leader Hamato Raphael."

"And my big brother. Never forget that."

"I won't. Love you Raph. Thanks for being always here for me."

"Love you Leo, the same."

Raph kissed Leo on the forehead and Leo hugged Raph. After the brief tender moment between the brothers, they set to watch the starts bright on the sky.

…

 **-Leo P. O. V.-**

People think that leadership is easy. That is merely giving an order and the other or others following the order to the letter. But, what they don't know is that leadership means much more than just giving an order. It is having an authority, to be strong, not just physical strength… It requires strength of the mind too. I always tried to reason with Raphael that being a leader is not an easy job. That he won't make a good leader, not because he was not fit, but because he was rash, and he was angry. He didn't even have enough control to reign his rage when we fought the Foot, the Purple Dragons or whichever villain we had a chance to meet on the streets and rooftops in NYC. He was thinking with his heart, and when in the heat of the fight took hold of him, well, let's just say that he lost track of time and place, and he just kicked and screamed and when he was finished, he would look around to check if all of us are okay. He'd do the same throughout the fight too, but not the way a leader would do it. The leader has to have a plan. Well, I seem to be the turtle with the plan.

Always.

I always see the field, the rooftop, the street, our lair, everything as a battle field. Don't get me wrong, I don't want to start World War III, but a good leader and an eldest brother, that's also a ninja and master swordsman with his almost 18 years, has to be prepared for everything, anytime, anywhere. He should not rest, he should think faster than his opponents. He needs to see 50 moves ahead of the person that's against him and his family. He needs to fight, not just for himself, but for other 4 members of his family, his brothers, and his father. He needs to fight for his friends, too. He needs to not show fear, to not surrender unless it's absolutely required, to never end a fight without wasting his last breath, without giving his enemy the taste of their own medicine.

A fighter, a ninja, a warrior, needs to fight with honor, with skills, and with heart and mind combined in one. Natural equilibrium. A place where his best and his worst traits merge, and he becomes "the freak" his opponents so much despise. To become a harsh, and rash mass of destruction. But, he should never kill, even when his opponents use dirty tricks on him… Sometimes it happens. But, in our case we were able not to kill anyone, just to kick some serious shell. That was until few months ago, when Raphael had to kill for the first time.

I can feel that he is troubled by that, but I don't know how to react in his case, because in the last three or four months, I lost count of that, I wasn't much better than him when he was his normal self. Before this happened to me… Before Jensen happened to me, and my family. Before I was scarred for life. Before I was marred forever with something that I won't ever be able to forget. Before I was raped and I was stripped off of my innocence and I stopped being just a young teenager that leads seemingly not so normal life like his peers in the human world. If I were human, Jensen would've gone to jail for doing that to me. But, there is no justice for me, because I'm not human, because I'm not one of them. No one cares, except my family and friends.

No justice for me, except the one of God.

I keep apologizing to them for all I have done in the last few months. I tried to kill myself. I was weak. Something no leader should be. From the strongest, I became the weakest link. And I regret that. I regret I let my mind wander and float in a dark place for a while. I regret for letting that bloody bullet hit me. If that didn't happen, nothing would've happened and my family would've never seen me like that, never have the chance to experience something this cruel… But, nothing can be done now. Everything happened, and nothing I say or I do will ever change that.

Now, this heart problem that came out of nowhere isn't helping me at all. I have to take it slow.

And I never take it slow.

Ask my family, ask my friends. They will tell you, I never ever take it easy. Even if I am at my worst I would never take it slow. I'll fight till the bitter end. But, I have to admit it to myself and to everyone else that I am not what I used to be. I am not the strong turtle I used to be. I am hurt, scarred, helpless, sick turtle. But, if I can help it, and have a word in my future destiny, in my fate, I will fight, as much as I can, to go back to what I once was. To be the warrior Hamato Splinter raised, again.

To be the leader of his clan when he retires.

To be his son and their big brother again.

I am Hamato Leonardo, and from now on I refuse to submit to the dark forces of my captor that still linger around me, even after his death! I refuse to let him rule with me and my conscience, and with my sanity. I refuse to be led by the feeling that I'm a failure. I choose to fight.

Because I am a fighter!

And I'll fight!

Till my last breath, I swear to God!

...


	18. Movie night

Chapter 18 - Movie night

* * *

 **Something that's been sitting in my "To Shell with Gunshots" folder for a couple of months, and I decided to post it as chapter 18 before I move on and point the focus of the story on Natalie for a while, before I fly this story to the birth of the twins. I hope you enjoy this chapter as much as I enjoyed writing it. And Happy Easter to all of you that celebrate today. I'm an Orthodox Christian and we celebrate it today. So Happy Easter to me!**

 **Of course, Happy Sunday too!**

* * *

"Okay bro, it's time for a little fun." Mikey exclaimed and watched Leo raise an eyebrow in surprise.

"What have you planned now Mikey?" Raph all, but growled.

"I guess that it's one of his pranks again." Don said, not lifting his look from the thing he worked on in the lab.

"Aw, don't be like that. Party breakers. It's something really fun."

"Can't wait to see what it is." Said Leo, playfully.

Leo let his brothers spoil him these past few months, and when he looked at himself in the mirror, he noticed that he put on some weight and he also noticed that the scars and the burn marks were completely healed. His ribs were still a little sore when he did sudden moves, and he still limped a little, but everything else was okay with him. Except his heart.

Ever since Natalie discovered that he experienced chest pains, and that he had problems with the heart that won't go away so easily, his brothers became like nannies to Leo. He wasn't allowed to train with them, just watch them. He wasn't allowed to lift anything that weighed more than a piece of bread. He wasn't allowed to go out without company. He was given strict order to do some cardio exercises from Natalie, and a strict order from Splinter and Donatello to take it easy and not tire himself too much.

Even with all of this babying, Leo felt tired, and many times you could find him napping in the living room with the TV on. At times like these Raph would look at his brother's peaceful form and will cover him with a blanket, scanning the lair to see if there is someone else nearby, and then placing a kiss on top of Leo's forehead. He really liked his brother, but he didn't show his love the way the others did.

"Well, if the bummer that's named Casey Jones comes to the lair in 5 minutes and brings the flick you'll all find out what I'm babbling about." Mikey said with his trademark grin.

"You told Casey to pick a movie? Oh Mikey, you really know what to do."

"What can I say Raph? It's the best thing we all 4 can do besides training to not argue all the time."

"Oh, shut up Mikey." Donnie said.

Leo just smiled at his brothers that were seated in the lair together with him. Master Splinter was paying a visit to the Daimyo and he said that he will spend the night there. The 4 of them were alone.

"And I also told Natalie and Thomas that we were having some movie night down here, so they may visit us to watch the movie together."

"Are you sure that Natalie should be coming down to the sewers with her pregnancy and her health issues?" Leo said.

"Don't sweat it bro." Mikey said. "I took care of that too."

"I'd like to hear that one." Said Donnie.

"Well, I might've spoken to the Earth Justice Force about out old lair that was destroyed, and they helped me to clean it up. And while they were cleaning up, I discovered that the elevator, that I found few years ago, miraculously survived. So, I told Thomas about that, and he will bring Natalie through that elevator. Then they will find their way here with the help of that vehicle you created once upon a time, that I may have left it earlier today there."

"You did what?"

"Relax Donnie, nothing happened to it, not a scratch."

"You are really thoughtful Mikey." Leo said. "Thanks for doing this."

"Doing what? Making my brothers happy? Duh."

"That's my line."

"Are you whining Donnie?" Raph asked.

"No, but…"

"Okay, game over. Time out. Chill bro."

Don opened his mouth and then closed it again. Soon April and Casey arrived, together with Thomas and Natalie.

"I see that Casey brought the movie." Raph said to his friend. "What did you pick up this time Case?"

"I picked something super awesome that I think you will all enjoy. A mix of martial arts, comedy and romance."

"Dude, don't tell me you picked a film with Jackie Chan."

"You bet I did."

As he played the tape of the film "The Tuxedo" they were all left speechless by Casey. He really knew how to pick a movie, something he proved himself in over the years.

Throughout the movie there were loud laughs that filled the lair, and rocked the walls as the crew of four plus their friends enjoyed their little movie night. Raph sat next to Leo and instinctively put his arm over Leo's shoulder to pull him closer to him and was more than happy to see that his brother wasn't startled by the touch. They enjoyed the film where Jackie Chan played that Tong guy who accidentally put the tuxedo on him and then he gained some amazing powers.

Raph felt a dead weight on his shoulder when he realized that Leo fell asleep on his shoulder. He snuggled closer to his older brother. He quietly warned the others, and Don went to Leo's room to bring back two blankets and covered Leo and Raph.

"He hasn't been this peaceful in his sleep since we got him back." Said Donnie.

"Yeah, it's like the movie made some magic bro. Like the tuxedo did for Tong."

"Yeah, I guess you can call this a magic."

"Or brotherly love." Natalie chimed in watching the brothers hugging each other.

"I guess you can call it brotherly love." Raph said. He tightened the grip around his brother and secretly snuggled even closer, trying to have Leo as closer as he could. He cherished these precious moments he shared with Leo and he would do nothing to change that.

He secretly wished that they could stay like this forever.


End file.
